Christianity – Page 28 – Growing 4 Life

With Acceptance Comes Peace

1 Comment / February 8, 2016 February 8, 2016

When you get to be my age, sometimes you look back over your past and you realize just how much you have changed in certain areas. Oh, in many ways, I am still the person I was but–praise God!– in so many ways I am not.

Sometimes it seems that all we hear about the Christian life is brokenness and imperfectness and how that unites us all. And, yes, we are all broken. I actually prefer the term sinful. It’s what we are and it is how we are born. But there is some victory over the years in the life of a servant of God who truly desires to obey the Word of God. I’d like to share one of those small victories with you today. I am not sure I was even aware of it until a conversation took place a few weeks ago.

This person was not happy with their circumstances. They kept reminding me of how unfair it all was and questioning why life wasn’t going a bit more according to their plan.

As I listened, vague memories of my own dissatisfaction with my life circumstances came to my mind. I remembered feeling much the same way about my life situation when I was a young wife with a houseful of small children and a workaholic husband. If you remember, we were building a business. And businesses take hours and hours and hours. My husband has never worked less than 55 hours a week. Many times it was more. (It probably still is). And, of course, in the beginning years, there was little money to show for it. It was a lot of hours for little reward.

I could feel myself growing slightly resentful. I’d hear of things other husbands were doing and how they were able to help their wives and I’d think to myself: That’s just not fair.

But somewhere in that time of my life when I could have grown bitter and resentful over this, the Lord opened my eyes to a wonderful truth–

With acceptance comes peace.

This particular phrase was coined by Elisabeth Elliot. I am using it because it is the simplest, most profound way to say what I learned.

My life was my life. I was not changing my husband. I knew enough to know that. So I could choose to be joyful in my circumstances or I could choose to be a miserable grump. The choice was all mine. And the ramifications of that choice would ripple out across my family.

As I understood this more fully, I came to understand that the only thing I could change was me. Was I so arrogant as to believe that I somehow I had it all together? Did I think my husband had it so easy to be married to me?

Yes, as the Lord opened my eyes to accepting my circumstances, he also opened my eyes to my own bad attitudes, unkind words, and impatience. And it was not a pretty sight.

As I started climbing out of the pit that complaining and dissatisfaction had kept me in, I started realizing just how good I had it. Sure, my husband worked long hours but he loved his family. He was there for the kids whenever he possibly could be, making it to more games and events of theirs than most dads who don’t work those same hours. We had winters together–a few quiet months each year to catch our breath and regroup as a family.

As I started to focus on the positive and not the negative, our family life changed. As I started focusing on fixing myself instead of fixing my husband, our marriage changed.

Oh, I’d like to say I never experienced defeat in this area again, but, of course, life isn’t like that. But remembering that accepting my circumstances is the key to peace (and joy, too) in my life has helped me navigate many an unfair circumstance in my life. That lesson I learned as a young mom has helped me through many difficult times.

Let’s face it–we could all have a reason to be dissatisfied with our lot in life in one way or another. And if the thing we struggle with could be fixed tomorrow, we’d find something else to be unhappy about. It is the very nature of our humanity. We actually have to work against our selfish nature to rise above it and reach acceptance.

Now, let me just add this one thing–

Acceptance is not the same thing as resignation.

Accepting our circumstances does not mean we resign ourselves to the fact that our circumstances will never change. We still pray and ask the Lord to convict those who need to change. We ask Him to turn hearts to Him or to work in an area of our life or someone else’s life that needs changed. Oh, how we neglect the power of God to change people when we don’t get on our knees with diligence and perseverance.

But while we wait for God to work, we have to accept His timing and His sovereignty in the situation and work on our own selves–humbly recognizing our own sinfulness and need for growth.

Yes, this can all be extremely difficult, but the sweet and abundant fruit we yield when we do so is so much different than the bitter, ugly fruit we yield when we don’t.

And, so, there is some victory in the life of a believer truly dedicated to God and His Word. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 is so true, isn’t it? —

All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, ¹⁷that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work.

The Word of God will change us–but only if we spend time studying it with a humble and yielded heart.

Love and Snakes

19 Comments / February 4, 2016 February 4, 2016

Once upon a time there was a young husband. His wife hated snakes with a passion. Deeply. And fully. This young man told his family just how much he loved his wife. He told his friends how much he loved his young wife. And he told his wife how much he loved her.

But one day the young wife came home to find a small snake statue sitting on her coffee table.

“What is this?” she demanded.

“Oh, I know you don’t like snakes but honey this is just a tiny, little statue. It’s not a big deal,” He rubbed her shoulders as he spoke, whispering the words soothingly.

The young wife relaxed a bit, still eyeing the statue doubtfully. She spent the next few days trying to ignore it. But every time she walked by she saw it’s beady marble eyes staring at her and she shivered. And that was when she started to doubt her husband’s love just a little.

Over the course of the next year, the husband brought more and more snakes into the house, rationalizing and explaining them away to his young wife, until one day he wall-papered their bedroom with photos of them.

The young women, unsuspecting, walked into the room after a long day and gave a little scream of shock. Her husband’s argument had always been that he doesn’t have any live snakes in their house. But no matter how he rationalized with her, she now realized that he didn’t really love her at all, but only said he did. The snakes covering their bedroom walls made that perfectly clear. For no man who truly loved her would make her live immersed in and surrounded by something that she abhorred.

That wasn’t love.

The end.

My brother, Pastor Dean, gives this illustration to explain the inconsistency of saying with our mouths that we love the Lord and yet then filling our hearts and minds with the things He hates.

My dear readers, I have a heavy, heavy burden over the entertainment blindness that is in the church. As if somehow entertainment is excluded from our call to purity and holiness. How has Satan so tricked us into believing that we can say we love the Lord and yet fill our eyes, ears, brains, and hearts with the things God abhors?

We find these things in Galatians 5:19-21–

¹⁹Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery,^[c] fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, ²⁰idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, ²¹envy, murders,^[d] drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

And Colossians 3:5-8–

Therefore put to death your members which are on the earth: fornication, uncleanness, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which is idolatry. ⁶Because of these things the wrath of God is coming upon the sons of disobedience, ⁷in which you yourselves once walked when you lived in them. ⁸But now you yourselves are to put off all these: anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy language out of your mouth.

There are many more places in scripture that show us the things we are to eradicate when we become saved. We have left the darkness and walked into the light. So why do we think it’s just fine to bring the darkness into our homes and cars and lives, as if not doing the actual sin ourselves somehow makes it all okay? Why do we want to?

Sorcery

Sexual Immorality

Violence

Crude Language

Funny thing is–or should I say the tragic thing is–not only are Christians watching these things but they are defending them under the guise of Christian liberty. They are are actually rationalizing and explaining away why it is okay to fill our minds with the things God hates.

This has been one of the biggest puzzles I have tried to understand as a believer. How can godly people who are in a good solid church and in the Word on a regular basis justify such evil entertainment?

I think it has something to do with the hardening our consciences. See, as the young husband filled his home with snakes, he became rather inoculated to them. He stopped thinking about the offense he was bringing to his wife. Oh, his conscience was pricked once in awhile–kind of like ours is after a sermon or blog post about entertainment is pricked, but not enough to actually make changes. After all, he could enjoy the feel of snakes–the look of snakes–and his fascination of snakes without having a real snake.

Let’s continue our story for just a moment. Let’s say that the young man saw his wife’s distress and, finally faces what he is doing to the relationship. Instead of rationalizing it away, he recognizes his lack of love towards her in one eye-opening moment. He starts removing the snakes from the house. As he does so, they start to lose their appeal. He eyes the statue in his hand and starts to wonder what his fascination was to begin with. As he turns it over, he recognizes it for what it is. As the weeks slip by, he finds snakes here and there but he is quick to remove them in his desire to eradicate all snakes from his life. Not only as a sign of love for his wife, but because has grown to hate them like her.

I’d like to share a quick story from my own life about this. I’ve shared it before but it’s been a long time. In the mid-90s my husband and I had a favorite TV show we liked to watch. We’d turn it on and for 30 minutes we could forget the world and just laugh. We enjoyed that and never really thought that much about it. Fast forward 15 years to when the show came back on in re-runs. Keep in mind that in that time, we were making an effort to purify our entertainment and to live out Philippians 4:8–

Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.

And Psalm 101:3–

I will set nothing wicked before my eyes;
I hate the work of those who fall away;
It shall not cling to me.

So one day I sat down to watch the show. And I was appalled. It was terrible. It was filled with fornication, crude language, envy, and a number of other things that all made me cringe inside. And I realized something–God was working in me! I was growing towards Him and away from the world.

I’d like to say I never struggled with this area of entertainment again, but of course I did. Of course I do. It’s a really tough area of life to navigate.

But may I suggest that we give this area of our lives to the Lord?

The other week I decided to look at the lyrics of the Top Ten pop songs chart for a Bible Study I was doing. Can I just tell you that it almost made me sick? Literally. And yet this is what Christians play on their radios, filling their minds with all kinds of evil. Allowing their kids to fill their minds with all kinds of evil.

Why don’t we care? Why doesn’t it bother us as believers? Those are the questions that I still have no answer for. However, from my own life, I have recognized one thing–

Our entertainment choices and spiritual growth are directly correlated.

Until I really gave an effort to purifying my entertainment, my spiritual growth was stunted.

I know that I am pretty alone on this issue. Our family has learned to take the criticisms and ridicule we regularly receive at not going to the popular movies filled with immorality, watching the TV shows filled with crude language, or ignoring the bestsellers that are full of sorcery. And, honestly, sometimes some of us cave to the peer pressure. It gets really old always having to be the odd one out and sometimes we blow it.

Someone accused me yesterday of thinking myself to be so righteous. At first, I was taken aback. I never want anyone to believe that about me. So let me be clear here– I am not righteous in any way, which is clear to me on almost any given day. I am just a wicked sinner saved by grace who loves her Lord. And I believe that my love for Jesus has to shine through all areas of my life–including my entertainment.

I hope that you will consider opening the entertainment room of your heart to the Lord.

Clearing Up a Muddy Subject

12 Comments / January 28, 2016 January 28, 2016

I once heard someone compare the church of today to a shallow river. The path of water is wide and muddy and impure. It’s the opposite of a church forced underground– which just like a spring of water that runs underneath the surface of the earth– runs deep and pure with little contamination.

The problem with the wide river is that it can be so difficult to find the true believers. The ones who have repented of their sins and truly desire to walk with God. The ones that wouldn’t say “See you later” when the first wave of persecution comes.

And you may be thinking–why does it even matter?

I believe it matters because, while we can be good friends with all floating in the river, true and lasting fellowship only comes between members of the true church. Who are we going to be able to count on and trust as we move closer and closer to a one world religion?

Our pastor has given our church family a Bible reading schedule for this year. We are reading through the four gospels through five times each. He schedules it so that we read the same one to three chapters each week five times. I love this because I become so familiar with the passage. In addition to reading, I sometimes will pull up a sermon or two on the Grace to You app that corresponds with what I am reading. I find this very helpful in helping me to understand difficult passages and they also give me a deeper understanding of the context of the passage.

This is what I did last week, when I came across verse 33 in Chapter 6 of John–

From that time many of His disciples went back and walked with Him no more.

What? Why? I was anxious to understand this verse and turned to John MacArthur for his wisdom on this passage. Part of what he had to share was so insightful and so helpful–especially in a world where everyone calls themselves a “Christian” –that I wanted to share it with you. I believe it will help us navigate this changing world.

He gave four different descriptions of a false disciple (the numbered list is by him but the commentary and the contrasts after it are by me, unless otherwise noted)–

(By the way, I want you to know that not everyone who exhibits one of these things listed below is unsaved. Even we genuine believers stray at times and can find ourselves a little lost. But keep your eyes out for those who hold to these beliefs or behaviors adamantly and arrogantly. Another sign is someone who takes verses out of context, who says that only parts of the Bible matter, or discounts the Word of God entirely. These are a few red flags)

1. False Disciples are attracted by a crowd.

They like to do what is popular and are always looking for what is trendy. They don’t want to be called names or take any heat for standing for Christ. They are of the sheep mentality, following the herd wherever it may lead– even if it’s over a cliff.

In Contrast–This would mean that true disciples are not ruled by the crowd. They are far more concerned with what Jesus thinks than what their families, co-workers, church friends, or classmates think. They may follow after the crowd for a bit until they realize that Living Water is not found there. True disciples are guided by the Word of God and not by what is popular.

2. False Disciples are fascinated by the supernatural.

They are looking for cool experiences and wonderful feelings and are driven by their desire for miracles, God’s personal messages, and encounters with angels. They want an emotional high and have little interest in truth–in fact most don’t believe there is such a thing as absolute truth and turn their backs completely on the doctrines of old as told to us in scripture.

In Contrast–While a true disciple may be temporarily fascinated by some of these things, as they grow in the Lord, they begin to recognize the danger in them. They understand that God’s Word has provided all we need and that voices and messages outside of scripture are not only unnecessary and irrelevant, but are generally downright dangerous.

Please note: I am not implying that miracles don’t exist but instead that our faith is not driven by them or reliant upon them. God has worked many miracles and still does so. We thank Him for those and continue to turn to the Word for our sustenance and faith and not to our personal experience to define our spirituality.

3. False disciples think only of earthly benefits.

Materialism, worldly goods, health, and wealth are why this disciple follows. He is looking for reward in this present life and if there isn’t any forthcoming is quick to turn away. This person expects God to be his personal genie–granting any wish he may have.

In Contrast–True disciples recognize the insignificance of earthly goods and success. While they enjoy them and thank the Lord for providing all of the things that makes for a wonderful life here on earth, they do not let themselves become too entangled with the things of this life.

4. False disciples have no interest in worship.

At first, when he said this, I thought–wait a minute. I know a LOT of people who like to worship. But then this made much more sense as he went on to describe it. This is what he said–

“But the false disciples, there’s no humility there, there’s no meekness there. There’s no adoring reverence. There’s no holy awe. They come for the external. They come for the show. They come for the promise, the hope of some temporal fulfillment. There’s no real obedience. There’s no longing for the glory and honor of God and the exaltation of Christ…They’ll watch a show and listen to music, but that’s a far cry from real worship.” (see link for sermon below)

So fake worship is given by false disciples. Fake worship contains no humility, no reverence, no holy awe. It is self-absorbed and is driven by an intense longing for an emotional high.

In Contrast–The true worshiper is a repentant, humble soul worshiping the God who saved him from death and destruction. He can worship through singing an old, obscure hymn as well as a worship song that contains biblical lyrics. It makes no difference to him. A true disciple recognizes that worship is a lifestyle. It isn’t about swaying to music or shouting aloud, but instead about a life that is lived every hour in submission and obedience to the Savior.

Has this helped you? Doesn’t it make a really muddy subject so much clearer?

And again, make sure you understand me–I am not saying that everyone who is caught up in some of this is not a true believer. What I am saying is that these are four clear signs that they might not be.

As we get closer and closer to the end, this is all going to sort itself out, isn’t it? As the persecution of the true church increases, the false disciples will fall away, just as they did in John 6. But, until then, let’s be wise as serpents and harmless as doves (Matthew 10:16). Although it’s so tempting, let’s not put our heads in the sand and ignore the swirling chaos that is the church around us, but instead, let’s watch with careful discernment and be sure to run everything through the grid of God’s Word.

If you’d like to listen to these helpful sermons, you can find them here–

True and False Disciples, Part 1

True and False Disciples, Part 2

Lessons from a Snowstorm

8 Comments / January 25, 2016 January 25, 2016

To say my weekend turned out nothing like I planned would be an understatement. It started off with a phone call on Friday morning that forced me to change my plans for the whole day. As I drove home on Friday night the snow was coming down much earlier than had been forecasted and the weather reports seemed to be raising the amount of snowfall expected. Our landscape company does snow removal, so I knew we were definitely in for an interesting weekend.

As the snow fell on Friday night everyone gathered at our house and we turned on a movie. But it was not a normal relaxed movie night as my husband, son, and son-in-law kept their eyes on the weather and wondered how they were going to handle such a huge storm.

Three days later, it is mostly over. Although as I sit here at my laptop, my guys are still clearing snow in their efforts to get normal life back up and running for folks. Oh, how I respect and admire them for this. I don’t think I could do it. They have been going nonstop since during the night on Friday with just a few hours of sleep. I don’t know about you, but I know that I couldn’t do that. I am so thankful for the men in my life!

My job is to take the inevitable phone calls, which is always an adventure. One of our secretaries made it into the office this morning, so I am finally getting the opportunity to sit down and write on this Monday morning. My thoughts feel a little scattered, so I am going to try to pull them all together.

The weekend was full of interesting stories and tidbits, but instead of relaying everything, I thought I’d just summarize a few lessons that I learned (or was reminded of yet again)–

1. God is faithful. I never fail to be amazed at how God works out all the details when these days come. We have breakdowns and we have problems, but God is there in the midst of it. Without question. I know skeptics call this coincidence. But really–is there such a thing?

2. Most people are still generally nice. At least that is what I experienced yesterday. Because of the huge amounts of snow, we had run into the unusual circumstance of our normal snow equipment not being adequate for all of our jobs. This meant contracting subcontractors with bigger machines. But most people were patient and very kind when they called to ask about their driveway.

3. Some people are not so nice and they are the ones who remind me that I still have such a long way to go in the sanctification process. At one point, one lady called to complain about something. Her complaint was certainly legitimate, but it was made with such anger and accusations that I had a very difficult time holding on to my temper. I did manage to do so, but I got a little sarcastic and felt quite a bit of glee informing her that I was one of the owners when she demanded to speak to one of them. It is people like this that remind me that I still have such a long way to go in loving others–especially the ones that are selfish and unkind.

4. God answers prayer. In the midst of the weekend, we ended up having quite the crisis. Without going into details, I felt so helpless and really had to reign in the worry and fear that was rising quickly inside me, threatening to overtake me. I learned again that when I am faced with circumstances far outside my control, that I am not that spiritually mature, after all. I enlisted a few people to pray and God answered in an amazing way. We feel undeserving but offer our deepest and most humble thanks to Him!

5. A thank you in the midst of something like this is like a balm to the soul. This morning, before I switched the phones back to the office, I answered a call from a local business that we plow for. As most calls are usually negative, I prepared for the complaint that was sure to come. Instead, they had called to thank us for doing such a great job. Wow. What a blessing! Just a simple phone call, so easy to do, and yet so many of us never take the time to do this. I am thankful that this man did so. It means so much to our guys to hear words of praise once in awhile. We are always so quick to complain but most of us rarely offer a thank you. This phone call reminded me of the importance to express my gratitude to others.

6. I won’t die if I can’t leave my house. One of the things I have had to get used to is being the last one plowed out. Even now, my driveway is full of snow and drifts. This used to really get to me and I would grow a little angry. But as I have gotten older, I have realized that it was just my selfish desire not to be stuck here that drove my anger. Now I just try to be patient and not to be an extra burden that my husband has to worry about. When I feel a little claustrophobia rising in me, I just remind myself that I have people who could pick me up if there was an emergency!

These are just a few of things I learned this weekend. I am sure I could come up with more, but I need to go get busy and see if I can get my life back to some semblance of order! Hope you have a great day!

Living in Stepford

6 Comments / January 21, 2016 January 21, 2016

I can still remember the “made for TV” movie called The Stepford Wives in the 1970s. It starrrd Barbara Eden of I Dream of Jeannie fame and, for whatever reason, made quite an impact on me. Many years later, maybe in the 90s, they remade the movie but I never watched that version, so I don’t know how similar it was to the first one.

The original movie was set in the town of Stepford, where an evil thing was happening –the husbands of the town were replacing their real wives and children with perfect robotic versions of them. Barbara Eden’s character gets wind of this and the movie is about her and her children fighting for their lives. The plot is a bit vague in the back of my mind and I don’t remember much, but I do remember one thing–it was creepy seeing all that “perfection”.

Yes, dear.

No, dear.

What do you want for supper, dear?

It wasn’t…normal.

Sometimes in life we see families a little like this. Of course, we know they are real people, but from the outside all looks to be quite perfect–at least for awhile. And, yet, in so many of these families the kids walk away from the Lord when they grow up. Why is that?

I have spent some time pondering the effects of legalism on a family. Why do some families who live by a set of rules have their kids grow up practicing a vibrant faith, while other families, living by those same rules, lose their kids to the world?

I believe this is a very valuable discussion, because many of us have grown so afraid to lay down strict rules for our children because we are so afraid of losing their hearts. But I don’t believe that one leads to the other. In fact, I have seen as many kids walk away from the faith who had permissive parents as those who walked away from the Lord under the care of strict parents.

So what is the key to raising kids who love the Lord? If it isn’t a set of rules or not having a set of rules, what is it?

It can be puzzling for us to see these churches and families who look a little like Stepford, But, perhaps, some of them, like the Pharisees, have never been cleaned from the inside out.

And so perhaps that is the answer to my question–

Some families are only focusing on the outside set of rules–concerned for their reputation and outward appearance. These families leave little room for discussion and use terms like “because I said so” and “you’re grounded” quite often. But other families are more concerned about their children’s walk with God, and they focus on the heart, recognizing that this is the fountain from which a holy life springs. These parents spend just as much time communicating and discussing the Word of God and what to live a Christian life means as they do disciplining bad behavior.

Actually, if you really think about it, legalism is just another false religion, isn’t it?

Last year I wrote a post on this topic of false religion. Here are a few paragraphs from it to remind us what exactly makes a religion true or false–

False religion teaches that your eternal destiny lies in your hands in one way or another. It will teach that you need to do something in order to be saved. Oh, they all vary in what that something is and they might even throw in as part of their doctrine something about Jesus saving you from your sins, but false religion will always require something other than faith alone.

Ephesians 2:8-9 confirms this–

For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, ⁹not of works, lest anyone should boast.

And so if we teach that we must add something to be right with God, we become heretics. This makes legalism damning–for it is a set of rules that needs to accompany saving faith in Jesus Christ.

Does that mean we need to toss all rules to the wind?

Of course not. Just as we need laws and policeman to enforce them to keep the public safe and secure, so we need to have some rules to keep our children safe and protected. It is our job. But we can never make the rules the heart of our parenting.

And, as our kids grow into teens, our rules should always have a reason based on the Word of God. For it is there we want our young adults to find their authority. It is there we want them to go with their questions and decisions.

Our family has been accused of legalism so often I can’t count. It seems in this culture, convictions and legalism equal the same thing. But I want you to know they are absolutely not the same thing.

Making a choice to do or not do something that is based on our love for Jesus and our desire to be like Him is not legalism. That is called a desire to be holy and pure, as commanded in scripture on multiple occasions (I Peter 1:15-16; Colossians 3:12)

And so, as believers, we shouldn’t pretend to be living in Stepford. And, honestly, who are we going to win for the gospel with that kind of Christianity, anyway? It looks impossible and the results are mixed, at best.

So let’s be real. Let’s make sure the world knows we aren’t perfect and that we continue to battle with sin each and every day. Let’s stop trying to look so perfect to the outside world–as if by becoming a Christian, our life somehow becomes perfect. But let’s also make sure we continue to strive to live a holy life, putting rules and guidelines in place that help us in our desire to be more like Jesus and to live a life that honors God, all the while keeping the focus on our hearts and the hearts of our kids, knowing that this is where all behavior is rooted.

And let’s remember the important difference between legalism and conviction, not allowing fingers pointed at us and voices calling us “legalistic” and “narrow-minded” to keep us from doing the right thing as we strive to live a life that is holy and separate from the world.

How Deep the Father’s Love

12 Comments / January 18, 2016 January 18, 2016

The other night my husband and I were laying in bed talking. As we prepared to go to sleep for the night, he turned over and wrapped me in his arms. As I lay there, listening to him breathe and feeling the warmth of his body, I felt so safe and secure. I don’t deserve to be loved as well as he loves me. I just don’t. I can be bossy and talk too much and struggle with being submissive sometimes but he loves me, anyway. I make mistakes and sin and fail and continue to do so even after all these years. And yet he continues to love me. For almost 28 years, this man has loved me despite my faults.

Of course, he has his faults, too, and so we love each other, offering much grace and mercy, in our mutual understanding that we are both sinful human beings in a fallen world.

I know I am beyond blessed to have this kind of marriage. I know that this is not the experience of everyone. And my heart hurts for those of you who have never experienced this or have experienced it but have had it taken away due to the great thief called Death. (And, on a side note–we all have our crosses to bear. My crosses just look different than yours. A happy marriage does not equal a perfect life.)

But as I was thinking about the security I feel in the imperfect, human love of my sinful husband, I found my mind moving to the absolute security, safety, and peace that we have in the perfect, divine love of our Heavenly Father when we are born again. We can trust Him wholly because of who He is.

It is a little easier for us to offer love to one another because we understand each others’ humanity. We expect the other person to make mistakes and to fail and change. We expect them to expect us to do the same.

But God doesn’t change. He doesn’t fail. He doesn’t make mistakes.

That He would reach down to love someone such as I astounds me. He is perfect, just, and holy. He is omnipotent and mighty. He does not need me for any reason. I have nothing to offer Him. Anything good in me is a gift from Him to be used for His glory. And yet, despite all this, He made a way for me–and for you, too–to be saved through faith alone, by His grace alone.

Ephesians 2:4-10 is just one of the scripture passages where we read of this great love towards wretched sinners–

But God, who is rich in mercy, because of His great love with which He loved us, ⁵even when we were dead in trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), ⁶and raised us up together, and made us sit together in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, ⁷that in the ages to come He might show the exceeding riches of His grace in His kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. ⁸For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, ⁹not of works, lest anyone should boast. ¹⁰For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.

God loves us with great love and much mercy. And that’s something to be thankful for today. There are so many songs about God’s love, but I think the song How Deep the Father’s Love For Us best expresses my thoughts for today–

How deep the Father’s love for us
How vast beyond all measure
That He should give His only Son
To make a wretch His treasure

How great the pain of searing loss
The Father turns His face away
As wounds which mar the Chosen One
Bring many sons to glory

Behold the man upon a cross
My sin upon His shoulders
Ashamed, I hear my mocking voice
Call out among the scoffers

It was my sin that held Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished

I will not boast in anything
No gifts, no power, no wisdom
But I will boast in Jesus Christ
His death and resurrection

Why should I gain from His reward?
I cannot give an answer
But this I know with all my heart
His wounds have paid my ransom

Here is the song, if you’ve never heard it but would like to. I hope it is a comfort and blessing to you today, no matter what circumstances you find yourself in–

Fury and Tears

8 Comments / January 10, 2016 January 11, 2016

It’s football time around here. Even though our favorite team lost their final hope of seeing a playoff game a few weeks ago, we will still turn on the playoff games to watch. Well, let me rephrase that–my husband will turn on the playoff games to watch. I don’t mind football and so I will sometimes watch with him. The other night he was downstairs and around 11:20pm he came bounding up the stairs and rushed over to the TV in our room. Turning it on, he explained that it was a very close game that could go either way. Being that this was the end of 2016 Superbowl hopes for either the Steelers or the Bengals, it was more important than most games. Little did we know that it was going to get way more interesting.

With just a few seconds on the clock, one of the Steelers took a hard illegal hit. While he lay sprawled on the ground, The Bengals players made their opinions known to the refs. Some were polite and some were not so polite. The fans were disgraceful in their dismay and disappointment as their team had really just given the game away. You could see tempers flaring and, for a second, those watching wondered if there would be some kind of brawl between the two teams on the field. Finally, the injured player hobbled over to the side of the field and the refs officially announced that it was an illegal hit and the Steelers, tailing the Bengals by just a point or two, received a 15 yard advantage. The refs gave the Bengals a second penalty due to a personal foul and the Steelers received another 15 yards, bringing them into very comfortable field goal range.

The kicker easily made that field goal and, after one last-ditch attempt by the Bengals, the Steelers were able to run off the field in triumphant victory. I might add that they ran off the field very quickly, as they really weren’t sure what the home team fans would do to them in their distress and anger over losing a game.

As they panned the field, one camera settled in on a Bengals fan–a woman fully decked out in Bengals attire. Her face gave evidence of her distress at the loss. Tears ran down her face as she stood there in disbelief. Her significant other stood by her side, trying to comfort her. And then the camera moved on to something else.

After it was all over, I really had to think about those few minutes of that game.

I thought about the wretched sinfulness that we battle every day and the wicked, wicked world we live in that yield nary a tear or even a bit of fury from most of us.

Instead our emotions are driven by things like football games.

Men act like overgrown boys as they huff and puff and stomp and yell and get in the faces of the refs, their anger and self-interest taking priority. Fans boo, call names, and cry. And this is all over a game.

A GAME.

Have we stopped recently to think about how ludicrous this is?

I heard later on that social media was very unkind to the crying woman on the camera. (In a world that seems to be so concerned about judging others, it would seem that social media is by far the cruelest, harshest judge in the world.) But I am not going to criticize her. After all, we all do what she did, don’t we? She just happened to have the great misfortune of a national TV camera settling in on her face so that the whole country could see her distress. Don’t we all get upset and cry over things that are totally and completely insignificant in the scope of eternity? Things that have no eternal value whatsoever? That’s the nature of being human.

But I think the thing that really made me stop and think is the fact that so often we Christians often do the same thing. Oh, we may not have cried at the loss of a football game recently, but I know that most things that make me furious or make me cry have nothing to do with the things in life that really matter. Instead they are usually just an outpouring of the deep selfishness that lies within me–the strong desire to have things my way.

This week I was reading in John 2 (verses 13-17) and I came to the section where Jesus throws the money changers out of the Temple. His anger in this chapter was justifiable. He was truly angry because people were not treating God and His Holy Temple with the respect and awe it deserved.

And I wonder–how many of us spend even a second thinking about the world that has entered our churches? How many of us even care? Do we care if the preacher has stopped using the Bible as he preaches? Do we care if the Worship Songs we sing sound more like love songs from the radio than worship to a Holy God? What about the entertainment being brought into the church in the forms of movies, music, and games?

Do we cry over this? Do we get angry? Do we even notice?

And so we find ourselves in this crazy mixed-up world where it’s okay to get angry and cry over childish games, but if we do the same over the great sacrilege we see in our churches, the wicked darkness of the world, or even our own sinfulness, we will be called narrow-minded and mentally disturbed. And we will be judged and we will be ostracized.

What is wrong with this picture?

But I guess we should be getting used to it by now. After all, we aren’t in Kansas anymore.

10 Reasons Why We Avoid the Altar

6 Comments / January 7, 2016 January 7, 2016

Sometimes I just don’t really want to be a Christian.

That’s just the honest truth.

Oh, I am not talking about the kind of Christian that is so popular these days–the kind who call themselves Christians and then go on to live however they want and do anything they want and still believe they have fire insurance from hell because they said a prayer. I’m not the judge, but God’s Word itself tells us about these kind of people—

But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away! 2 Timothy 3:1-5

No, I am talking about the real kind. The kind that Paul describes in the New Testament. The kind Jesus says He is preparing a place for in heaven.

Being this kind of Christian is so hard some days. In fact, if it weren’t for the Holy Spirit living inside of us true believers, drawing us to the Word and transforming our lives, it would be impossible.

I happened upon the lyrics of “Trust and Obey” the other day. It was the fourth, little-sung verse that really made me think–

But we never can prove the delights of His love
Until all on the altar we lay;
For the favor He shows, for the joy He bestows,
Are for them who will trust and obey.

There is such truth in this verse–supernatural peace and lasting joy and God’s favor are just part of our reward when we sacrifice our life for Christ. But, oh, how much our human flesh hates that altar! We sing songs that say we surrender all or lay all at the feet of Jesus, but do we? Really?

It costs us so much. And so many of us don’t want to pay the price. I thought of ten reasons why we are so tempted to avoid the altar–

1. We have to give up our independence. Our life is no longer our own and we hate that. We want to make our own decisions and choices without anyone–even God– looking over our shoulders, telling us what to do.

“I am the vine, you are the branches; he who abides in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit, for apart from Me you can do nothing.” John 15:5

I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God, that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God, which is your reasonable service. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God. Romans 12:1-2

2. We have to hand over our dreams, our hopes, and our expectations to God. We are told every day by some author or TV personality to follow our dreams. But is this, truly, what scripture teaches? No, it is not. And this can be extremely difficult–especially if we don’t know our heavenly Father well enough to trust Him. (The absolute beauty of this sacrifice is that God changes and molds our dreams to reflect His will and, so, when it is all said and done, we are more far more fulfilled than if we would have had our own paltry dreams, anyway!)

Then Jesus said to His disciples, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow Me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will find it. Matthew 6:24-25

3. We have to stand alone sometimes. This takes a tremendous amount of courage, as it means we can no longer follow the crowd. Peer pressure can be so strong. If we are a follower, this can be so difficult. We want to be liked. We want to be cool or hip or trendy. It’s hard to be the one that’s different. The one that people are talking about behind their hands on the sidelines of the soccer game or around the water cooler at work.

Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Ephesians 6:13

If you were of the world, the world would love its own. Yet because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you. John 15:19

4. We have to swim upstream in a downstream world. It is exhausting. Sometimes my husband and I just wanted to tell our kids to go to that movie, get that video game, or whatever, because we were just so tired of swimming upstream. It is downright hard work to be the one moving one direction, when the rest of the world is moving a different direction.

Enter by the narrow gate; for wide is the gate and broad is the way that leads to destruction, and there are many who go in by it. Because narrow is the gate and difficult is the way which leads to life, and there are few who find it. Matthew 7:13-14

5. We have to give up the things of this world. We walk away from the world and towards Jesus. But the ramifications are much broader than you’d first think when you read the verse below. Setting our eyes on Jesus and eternity means we purposefully change how we handle money, what radio station we listen to in the car, what movie we go to see, how we spend our time, what books we read, and how we celebrate holidays. We stop acting and looking like the world and purposefully, and with the help of the Holy Spirit, grow to look more like Jesus.

Do not love the world or the things in the world. If anyone loves the world, the love of the Father is not in him. For all that is in the world—the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life—is not of the Father but is of the world. And the world is passing away, and the lust of it; but he who does the will of God abides forever. I John 2:15-17

Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal; but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also. Matthew 6:19-20

6. We lose the glory. This one can be really hard in this age of self-glory. We live in a world of “selfies” and mega-stars. But, as believers, should self-glory be our goal? As we grow in Christ, we realize the depth of our sin and that it is God who works in us to do any good thing. This can be hard to believe if we are full of pride and desire the glory for ourselves.

Therefore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God. I Corinthians 10:31

And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance; for you serve the Lord Christ. Colossians 3:23-24

7. I must decrease. Every choice, decision, and thought should be based on the Word. Salvation costs us nothing and yet it costs us everything. We are all at different points on our journey with God, traveling at different speeds and jumping different hurdles. But, as a rule, we believers are decreasing in our own eyes, while Jesus is increasing.

He must increase, but I must decrease. John 3:30

8. We must turn away from human wisdom. Instead of believing what the scientists say, we look to the Bible. Instead of believing the psychologists, we turn first to the scriptures.

Because the foolishness of God is wiser than men, and the weakness of God is stronger than men. I Corinthians 1:25

For the wisdom of this world is foolishness with God. For it is written, “He catches the wise in their own craftiness”; I Corinthians 3:19

9. We lose our rights— While we all have basic human rights that are set up in the first few books of the Bible, when we lay our lives on the altar, we give up our right to indulge, our right to follow our flesh, our right for revenge, our right to never forgive; our rights to do what we want, to say what we want, to live how we want, to watch what we want; to read what we want. We submit to the will of the Father in all things. We find out His will by reading His Word.

Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body^[c] and in your spirit, which are God’s. I Corinthians 6:19-20

10. We have to admit that there isn’t anything we can do to save ourselves from our sinful state. This may be the hardest thing of all for some of us. In our human pride, we like to insist that we have something good to bring. Did you ever think about the fact that Christianity is the only religion that doesn’t require something from man to be right with God? It doesn’t require good works or a human sacrifice. It doesn’t require prayer five times a day or a pilgrimage to some distant land. It is truly the gift of God to mankind. But, even when we accept Christ’s gift to us, we can sometimes forget that it has nothing to do with us and go back to thinking that our good works are helping us get to heaven. But this is not what the Bible tells us.

For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, ⁹not of works, lest anyone should boast. Ephesians 2:8-9

But let’s not end this post in this place where all looks to be sacrifice with no reward. There are so many reasons why the price of laying our lives on the altar is so very worth it. Besides the fact that it is the least we can do to honor and love the Savior who died for us, we reap so very many rewards. Here are just a few verses to get you started. It may be something to study for yourself–

The sting of death is sin, and the strength of sin is the law. But thanks be to God, who gives us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. Therefore, my beloved brethren, be steadfast, immovable, always abounding in the work of the Lord, knowing that your labor is not in vain in the Lord. I Corinthians 15:56-58

Now thanks be to God who always leads us in triumph in Christ, and through us diffuses the fragrance of His knowledge in every place. 2 Corinthians 2:14

and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:7

As the Father loved Me, I also have loved you; abide in My love. If you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love, just as I have kept My Father’s commandments and abide in His love. These things I have spoken to you, that My joy may remain in you, and that your joy may be full. John 15:9-11

Now godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out. I Timothy 6:6-7

We have one to life. One. And God has graciously given us a choice. We can choose Christ or we can choose self. But we can’t choose both. That is one of the fundamental truths of the New Testament. You will hear so many pastors and teachers and authors and song-writers telling you otherwise these days. But I encourage you to study the Word for yourself and read what it says. Laying our lives on the altar is just what we believers do. It is part of the wonderful transformation that takes place when we are saved.

Oh, we all grow at different rates and find ourselves at different parts of the journey, so I wouldn’t recommend looking around at how much your Christian neighbor has surrendered. That’s between him and the Lord. But have you laid your life on the altar? For, me, personally, I find it a daily struggle. I can see I am much further along than I was 20 years ago and that gives me hope. But each day I find myself struggling with my flesh in one area or another, but I continue the battle, never giving up. I hope you feel the same way. I leave you with these words of Paul–

For I am already being poured out as a drink offering, and the time of my departure is at hand. ⁷I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith. ⁸Finally, there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous Judge, will give to me on that Day, and not to me only but also to all who have loved His appearing. I Timothy 4:6-8

May we, too, be able to say this same thing when we have reached the end of our lives.

How Did That Happen?

4 Comments / December 28, 2015 December 28, 2015

The other night as I stood over the sink, cleaning up from another big meal I had planned and prepared during this holiday season, I suddenly realized that somehow over the past 25 years I went from being completely incapable in the kitchen to being able to prepare a meal for 10-20 family members and/or close friends and not even be really stressed about it.

When did that happen? Or perhaps a better question is: How did that happen?

First, you have to understand that hospitality would not be my natural gift. Food preparation and serving takes me way outside my comfort zone. Way outside.

I remember the first meal I cooked for my in-laws. I have this vague memory of burning the peas. I was so incredibly stressed. Not because of them–they were more than gracious. It was just so stressful to plan and prepare meals for even two extra people who I wanted to impress. It wasn’t much better the next time I tried to host a couple from our church for Sunday lunch–we arrived home to find that I had never turned the oven on for the roast!

But I survived those embarrassing incidents of hosting guests in that tiny apartment we first called home and just kept trying. And, gradually, over the years, somehow everything changed.

But that change only occurred because I forced myself to have that first meal. And then a second. And then a third. Had I just refused to have people in my home from the beginning or even after those first couple attempts–using my fear and inability as an excuse– I would not be where I am today.

And it’s a great reminder that sometimes we need to step forward in faith to do the good works God has prepared for us despite the fear and the inability. Despite the failures.

We will never change if we don’t start walking in the direction we want to go. We won’t accomplish much if we never even try.

Sure, it took me a really long time to get here. But I did get here. Sure, I still have failures sometimes (like making the pineapple stuffing a little too crispy on Christmas day!) But now I know that I can survive failures without the world coming to an end.

Life is good. But it’s way better if we know we are doing the will of God and living to glorify Him, despite our personal fears and insecurities.

Is there anything that you know God has called you to do that is just way outside your comfort zone? Perhaps it is witnessing to a co-worker or starting to tithe? Maybe it is disciplining your children properly or memorizing scripture? Showing hospitality, getting rid of the TV, getting involved in a ministry at your church or asking someone to forgive you–these are all things that take great courage. But if we never try, we will never change.

As we contemplate this year’s end, may we reflect on what it is that God would like us to change this coming year. Let’s start thinking about how we may be better able to please Him by making a change or two in our lives, taking that first step of faith forward. Let’s show the world around us that we are never satisfied with status quo.

Where the Rubber Meets the Road

2 Comments / December 23, 2015 December 23, 2015

So many of us consider ourselves pretty good Christians. We don’t drink in excess, we don’t steal from our bosses or cheat on our taxes. We have been faithful to our spouses and we go to church almost every Sunday. All good things.

But there is nothing like a week full of family get-togethers to remind us of our sinful natures. This is where the “rubber meets the road” in our profession of Christianity.

As families go, I am pretty blessed. But in every family we have the potential of run-ins and relationship problems because we all are different– we have different priorities and we have differing views on religion and politics. We don’t raise our kids the same way. And we don’t feel passionate about the same things. Some of us tend to be very loud and boisterous and others of us are quiet and reserved. All this means that we don’t always see eye-to-eye. How that plays out is not the same in every family.

Some families have loud debates or even arguments. Other families are full of sarcastic remarks that infuse every family gathering. In some families, it is just a cold, unbreakable tension that lies underneath all that goes on during their times together.

Hurtful remarks. Sarcastic comments. Cold shoulders.

They can all add up to a real lack of peace among family members.

And I am here to encourage you not to be part of any of it.

As Christians dedicated to growing in holiness each and every day, let’s be the ones that bring peace and unity to the family.

What does this look like in practical terms?

These thoughts came to my mind this morning before I started my Bible reading this morning. A few minutes later I read this in I Peter 3—

8 Finally, all of you be of one mind, having compassion for one another; love as brothers, be tenderhearted, be courteous;[a] 9 not returning evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary blessing, knowing that you were called to this, that you may inherit a blessing.

These verses give us such clear instructions on how to relate to others—practical and helpful as we face a week of family get-togethers and parties with friends.

We are to be of one mind. This is what Matthew Henry writes in his commentary about this sameness of mind that we are to have with other believers—

Christians should endeavour to be all of one mind in the great points of faith, in real affection, and in Christian practice; they should be like-minded one to another, according to Christ Jesus (Rom. 15:5 ), not according to man’s pleasure, but God’s word.

This unity can only be experienced with our Christian brothers and sisters. We will not be able to be unified with unbelievers, as we are categorically in opposition as we journey towards two opposite goals.

However, even if we can’t be unified with unbelieving family members, we can certainly practice being compassionate, tender-hearted, and courteous, can’t we? We can practice returning good for evil. We can choose to bless, rather than to choose revenge.

Revenge is such an ugly word, but in everyday life it can be very tempting to exact. It’s not always something dreadful but can instead be how we choose respond to a person–making sarcastic remarks or ignoring them, as we seethe in our souls.

Every day offers us opportunities to live out I Peter 3:8-10. But there are few times each year that offer us so many opportunities to practice this than during the Christmas season–a time that taxes even the closest of families.

May we be the ones that bring a breath of fresh air to our family gatherings. Let’s be the ones that offer abundant grace and blessing, no matter how hurtful the remark or how unkind the deed. It may not be easy, but we have the Holy Spirit guiding and directing us. Let’s walk in the Spirit and choose to show loving-kindness with a joyful heart this holiday season!

**On a different note**
I’d like to thank you, dear reader, for joining me on my journey to grow in Christ this past year. I count it as a privilege and a blessing that you would use some of your precious time to read my posts. I wish you a wonderful Christmas and a blessed New Year.