Encouragement – Page 26 – Growing 4 Life

Dealing with Difficult People

6 Comments / April 28, 2014 April 28, 2014

Have you ever had to deal with someone you just couldn’t make happy? Or perhaps it is someone who lies constantly, is consistently unkind, or very angry? Or maybe they just absolutely exhaust you by telling you all of their woes? Sometimes, if they are friends, we can gently extricate ourselves from these relationships. But, many times, we can’t. We may go to church together. Or we may work together. More often than not, our difficult relationships are within our own families.

So what then?

So often we continue to live with a sense of constant frustration in this state of affairs. When someone is affecting our personal peace or happiness, we can get really annoyed. But how should we look at these situations?

I have floundered in this area for years. If I was struggling in a relationship, I would grow irritated and hopeless. But then, a few months ago, I heard this sentence in a sermon–

We need to look at difficult people as the tools God uses to shape us to look more like Jesus.

Ever since that time, my whole viewpoint has changed. You see, I used to view these relationships as obstacles that were keeping me from looking like Jesus–unnecessary extra baggage that kept tempting me and causing me to fail (notice my finger of blame was pointed at them, not myself…)

But this one sentence clarified for me that I had it all wrong. ALL wrong. These people in my life are there to help, not hinder, my walk with Christ.

Because I have this new perspective, it changes everything. Oh, I still grow frustrated and annoyed, but I can see the big picture now. Instead of incidents seeming pointless and ridiculous, I see them as challenges I need to rise up and meet as Jesus would have.

I know this is so easy to say in principle. Some of you are almost buried underneath dysfunctional families or bad work situations. This isn’t an easy thing to live for any of us, but for some of you it probably feels impossible. I hope that this helps, at least a little.

You see, we can’t change anyone but ourselves. But, by the power of the Holy Spirit, we can change ourselves. Let’s rise up and meet the challenge of personal change instead of being so worried about the pointless, fruitless endeavor of changing the other person.

De-Sensitized

Leave a Comment / April 1, 2014 October 22, 2017

SO…I spent most of the past week battling some type of cold or flu. Not sure what it was, but besides making me all around miserable and even a permanent resident on my sofa for a couple of those days, it also made me lose all sense of taste and smell. While I can recall having bad colds and flus before, I cannot ever recall losing almost all sense of taste and smell. It’s actually really weird.

It first started with my morning coffee one day last week. It just tasted…off. I dumped it down the drain and tried a different k-cup. Maybe the first one was old. But, no, it was the same thing with the second cup. Coffee is usually one of the first things to go when I have a cold, so I wasn’t all that surprised. But then my fruit-infused water tasted off and basically anything I put in my mouth had no flavor. I could just barely taste salty and really sweet things.

I am still not tasting very well. It makes it very easy not to eat. Maybe someone should look into this for a new weight loss technique?

But, of course, as usual, it got me thinking. Why doesn’t anything taste good? Because I’m sick. Why can’t I smell anything? Because I’m sick.

And I started thinking over the years of my life and how my hunger for God’s Word has grown in the recent years. As a young person, I had a really hard time sitting down to read the Bible. And I wonder if I wasn’t a little like my physical body–so sickened spiritually by all the junk I was taking in or the sinful habits that had ensnared me, that I was de-sensitized to the beautiful, life-changing Word of God.

I think sometimes we wonder why God’s word doesn’t “taste” good to us (Psalm 119:103). We sit down and try to read it and we find it dry and boring. I have been there. But now I realize that it is me– not the Bible– that is the cause of my lack of interest.

If we are making a conscious effort to please God, with a humble heart and a deep desire to be holy, then, while we will make mistakes and still sin (obviously), God’s Word will fill a deep hunger inside us that will be nonexistent otherwise. And it will taste wonderful. Like life-giving water.

I’m still growing and still learning, so this is just a theory. I still have some days where I am reading the Bible and I grow disinterested or distracted. But, after this week’s experience, I may just take my spiritual temperature on those days because I know it is my problem.

You know I believe a very large part of the problem in the modern day church stems from biblical illiteracy. If we don’t know our Bibles we can not really even know God, we won’t be able to discern and defend truth, and we will fall prey to any wind of false doctrine that comes along. If Satan can trap us in a sinful habit or busyness or worldly entertainment, he knows it will diminish our hunger for the bread of life.

Wow. The things you can learn from being sick. I’ll just think about this while I sip my coffee that still tastes like…not much of anything. I am very much anticipating the return of my taste buds!

SEE–

2 Timothy 3:16

Hebrews 4:12

Psalm 119

James 1:21-22

But Why, God?

2 Comments / March 24, 2014 March 24, 2014

Something terrible happened over the weekend to a really nice family. I don’t know them all that well, but I do know that, from my purely human point of view, they certainly didn’t deserve this tragedy in their lives.

I found myself really questioning the goodness of God as I tried to sort through all of this in my mind. Bad things happen to godly people. We know this is a fact of life. And, yet, sometimes, it just hits us and our spirit cries out to the Lord, asking “But why, God?”

It wasn’t that I was questioning Him. I know (in my head) that He is good all the time. And I know that He loves this family and that hasn’t changed because He has allowed this tragedy in their lives. But my heart was having a really hard time wrapping itself around the why. What good purpose could this possibly have?

I don’t have the answer to that. Just like good purposes and lessons learned do not always show forth through the hard moments and difficult times in my own life, I may never know why this family has suffered so.

But God knows. I try to remember that He sees the whole tapestry, while I only see a tiny speck of it. One tiny dot in the scope of all of time in the whole world. I can’t help but realize that I really know nothing and should not judge God based on my very limited perspective.

As I was pondering all of this, I just “happened” to read the following in a *fiction book I am reading–

“See, typically we measure goodness by whether we like something or not. I like this, so it’s good. I don’t like that, so it’s not good. We can do this with God, pretty easily, in fact. If He does something we like or agree with, then He’s good. If He does something or allows something we don’t like, we’re not so sure anymore. We won’t usually say it out loud; that would be impolite. But we can go there in our hearts. And once we do, we start to pull away from the Lord . Do you think that could have happened here?”

And this–

“God doesn’t just do good, Shawn. He is good. His goodness flows from his very nature. Because we don’t always understand what He’s doing, some of it doesn’t seem good to us. But that’s where our faith comes into play. We must believe, as Paul says, that God is working all things together for our good. In time, His goodness and good purposes will become clearer to us. But it can take time.”

Wow. A sermon to me right in the middle of a novel, just when I needed it. And people say there is no personal God? I beg to differ.

Of course, that last sentence — about His purposes becoming clearer in time–while that is sometimes true, it isn’t always true, is it? Sometimes we will never find out this side of heaven.

But how convicted I was by that first thought— Wasn’t I judging God’s goodness based on my perception of what is good? Only God knows the ramifications of any tragedy. He knows whose hearts will be touched and what seeds will be planted. He knows the spiritual growth that will take place and the relationships that will be changed. We can’t see it all, because we are limited by time and our own perspectives. I keep coming back to that word “limited”.

And I realized something — how dare I judge God based on my own limited and humanly flawed knowledge? How dare I? Who do I think I am, anyway?

I remember a friend once saying that she believes it is actually a sin to question God and to ask why. I am not sure about that, but I do believe that if we don’t come to a place of utter submission to His will after our initial and natural questioning, we will struggle all of our lives in our relationship with Him. It is about sovereignty and submission. Very very unpopular words in this culture we find ourselves.

And, interestingly enough, as I was thinking through all of this, another friend who is going through an extremely difficult time in her life shared with me a really amazing way she has seen the Lord take her tragedy and bring someone to Himself because of it. Now if that isn’t an encouragement to keep trusting, I don’t know what is.

But, no matter what outcomes we do or do not see, scripture teaches us that we are to keep submitting and trusting, knowing that our heavenly Father loves us and will keep us in His care, no matter what we face (I Peter 5:7; Lamentations 3:25; 2 Corinthians 1:3-4).

*Walsh, Dan (2010-06-01). Homecoming, The: A Novel (Kindle Locations 3581-3584 & 3588-3591). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.

Only God

2 Comments / March 6, 2014 March 6, 2014

It was a cold, windy day and I had two boxes of flowers in my car. We had them left over from a garden show and I was determined to keep them from a lonely death in my garage, while giving a few friends a little taste of spring in this long winter. As I pulled up to a friend’s house, I remembered that there was another lady there at her house. As I got out of the car, I decided spontaneously to take an extra hyacinth in with me and give it to her. I don’t know her all that well, but, hey, who turns down a spring-scented flower? Especially after this winter!

As I handed her the flower, her face lit up and she thanked me.

I thought no more of it. Until I got a thank-you card from this woman a week or so later.

You see this woman’s mother lives with her. And she has terminal cancer. She had given up. This is a portion of the note:

I don’t know flower names, but the minute Mom saw it she exclaimed, “Where did you get that! I love hyacinths. We can plant it in the front yard come spring.” That is the first time my mother looked ahead with any joy.

Now, here is the thing– I had NO idea that her dying mother’s favorite flower was a hyacinth. I didn’t even know she had a mother who has cancer. I could just as easily have given her a daffodil or tulip, both of which were with me in my car. Why did I choose to give her a hyacinth?

But God knew. God knew that a hyacinth, specifically, would brighten up this woman’s mother’s day like nothing else. He knew it would be a source of encouragement to both of them in ways I could never have imagined.

It’s funny, but I continue to be amazed at how much God cares about the small stuff in our lives. How can this be? There is so much hurt and pain and tragedy everywhere. There are wars and rumors of wars. There are failing economies. And yet, amidst all of this, God cared enough to bring this woman the “right” flower.

What an awesome God we serve.

Bird in a Blizzard

2 Comments / February 13, 2014 February 13, 2014

As I looked out my window at the blowing snow this morning, I couldn’t help but notice the four little sparrows hopping around our bird feeder. One was on the feeder, while it blew in the wind, and three were on the ground below, their feathers all fluffed out as they searched for fallen seeds. The temperatures are cold this morning–26 degrees Fahrenheit– and I know I wouldn’t want to be outside. And I couldn’t help thinking–

I’m so glad I’m not a bird today.

But then I remembered that God created them with very specific features. They have exactly what they need to survive this day.

And so the sparrows that sit in the trees and sing on warm summer mornings are the same sparrows that have to endure winter. But God has prepared them and, most likely, they will survive to see summer come again.

Thinking about this made me realize that God will prepare you and me for whatever winters come our way, as well. I was talking with some friends the other day about the great Christians who have been martyred in other times and other lands. As we talked we pondered about the possibility of that happening in our country and whether or not we would have the strength to stand for what is right if it came. I said, “God would give us the grace. He promises to give us the grace.” But as I said it, inside my head I wondered a bit. Would He really??

And then this morning He showed me the birds. And I knew. He will prepare us for whatever is to come. He will not leave us or forsake us through the dark valleys that are ahead. Just as the birds have been prepared for their winters, so will we be prepared for ours. If we are a true believer and Jesus Christ has saved us, then we can rest in this thought.

This Is the Day

4 Comments / February 10, 2014 February 10, 2014

As I have muddled through the last few days, I have struggled. The winter has been long and filled with snow and ice. It has been absolutely frigid and cloudy most days and now I am fighting a cold. It is starting to feel like spring will never arrive.

But then God reminded me that He has made this day and I am to rejoice in it (Psalm 118:24). These days. This winter. And I have to continue to be faithful even when all I feel like doing is putting on sweatpants, wrapping up in a blanket, and watching TV.

There are no conditions attached to this verse. Wouldn’t it be easier for our flesh if there were?

This is the day the Lord hath made, rejoice if everything is going your way or rejoice if you got that promotion you wanted, or rejoice if the sun is shining.

But, as much as we would like to, we can find no conditions attached to this verse. We are to rejoice in each new day God grants us.

The best way to get a good start on our day is to get up with these words on our lips: “This is the day the Lord hath made, I will rejoice and be glad in it!”

There is lot to be done and I am to do it cheerfully! How much easier is this task if I acknowledge that, no matter what the day brings I can rejoice, knowing that God is in control and that I can rest in His hands, trusting Him.

And, ironically, it is when I can fight my flesh and actively accomplish my work for the day, I am energized and fulfilled. On the other hand, when I give in to my fleshly cravings and lay around all day, I am filled with lethargy and a vague sense of dissatisfaction.

So which will it be today? I choose to rejoice!

I am so thankful that God cares enough about me to remind me that He has made this day and that I am to rejoice in it!

Thankless Jobs

6 Comments / February 6, 2014 February 6, 2014

As my husband crawled into bed last night, exhausted after several nights of little sleep and hours and hours out in the cold, he said these words to me: “There is one thing about snow removal. It is such a thankless job.”

He went on to talk about his day and the lack of gratitude he gets in the snow removal business. I dealt with my own end of that this past week, where the east has been coated in snow and ice. I am the lucky girl who gets to take the phone calls. And, trust me, people do not call to say how awesome of a job we did. It is always a complaint. Mostly by people who aren’t very kind as they express their frustrations. Now, I will say this, some people are very nice when they call and that helps so much. And I am also thankful that we have an AWESOME crew who does a GREAT job and so the calls are fairly infrequent. But it does remind me of a couple of things —

1. We need to thank someone who does something we take for granted. Someone is working hard, often during the hours you are asleep, so that you can get to work tomorrow or walk safely on the sidewalks leading into the bank or the grocery store. If you see them out working, tell them you appreciate them. But this isn’t just about snow removal. Think about other thankless jobs people do each and every day and then intentionally start thanking those people.

2. We need to do our duty, with or without the praise of men. Sometimes we find ourselves relying on someone saying thank you or good job and when it doesn’t come we get discouraged and want to quit. But Colossians 3:23-24 says And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance; for you serve the Lord Christ. Yes! We serve the Lord, not man. Whether we are doing the dishes, plowing snow, or collecting garbage, we are to do it out of a heart of love for our Lord.

And so the long winter continues, but it has not been without its life lessons and good reminders. And while I am thankful for what God is teaching me, I do find myself longing for the sunny summer days. I guess they will come soon enough.

It’s An Exciting Time To Be a Christian!

Leave a Comment / January 28, 2014 January 28, 2014

I just saw an article on Facebook about how the government is spying on us using apps like Angry Birds and Google Maps.

In the last several weeks, incidents of random shootings at malls and grocery stores and on the highway have been a regular occurrence.

People, who call themselves Christians, are aligning themselves with worldly philosophies and practices at a record number with little resistance from solid, Bible-believing folks.

SELF has become god and most of us are all about seeking pleasure, comfort, power, and money. Even many of us Christians have fallen prey to this.

Children aren’t taught to obey and we are starting to reap the fruits of this in our schools and our communities.

The video game, movie, and music industries fill our minds with anti-God philosophies, while we just sit idly by, oftentimes using our God-given money to purchase it.

False teachers have infiltrated almost every aspect of the true church and have been warmly welcomed in the name of unity.

Wars and Rumors of Wars are in the news almost constantly.

This reminds me of 2 Timothy 3:1-5:

But know this, that in the last days perilous times will come: 2 For men will be lovers of themselves, lovers of money, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, 3 unloving, unforgiving, slanderers, without self-control, brutal, despisers of good, 4 traitors, headstrong, haughty, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 having a form of godliness but denying its power. And from such people turn away!

Matthew 24 also comes to mind.

As I read through these passages the other day, I realized something: We are HERE. We are in the last days. I don’t know if they will last a month or a hundred years, but they are here.

The puzzle pieces are starting to come together like never before —

We can now see how the mark will be a computerized chip lodged just below the skin.

We can understand how the witnesses will be seen across the world — an absolute puzzle to generations before us who never even heard of satellites.

We can understand how Israel will desperately need the peace treaty with the antichrist.

We can see how, right before our eyes, a one-world religion is forming, pushed through by many “evangelicals”, surprisingly.

We are watching the formation of a cashless society develop, which will eventually lead to a one world economy.

We can see the downfall of America, as it weakens and corrodes from within. America can’t be strong in the end–we aren’t even mentioned in the Bible. And it looks like we are losing our influence and power at a record pace.

And while all of this is slightly frightening, it is also INCREDIBLY exciting! Fellow Christians, if you believe the Bible with all your heart and soul, we are living in a time where we are seeing prophecy being fulfilled right before our eyes! It is truly amazing.

Most Christians do not want to think about the end days. But John tells us in Revelation 1:3 that we are blessed if we read and and hear the words of the prophecy contained in Revelation. We aren’t just to push this book aside, because the time is near. If it was near two thousand years ago, can you imagine how much closer we are now?

I repeat: It is an incredible time to be a Christian! Let’s not forget that, amidst our discouragement and fear. We know the ending of this story and we are on the winning side!

Please note: It seems as if Facebook has been stone-walling me. If you like this post (or any of my posts), I would be very appreciative if you would share them. Thank you :)

Looking Back and Looking Forward

4 Comments / December 31, 2013 January 1, 2016

As another year draws to a close, I inevitably start looking to the new year. Budgets are again created for our household and business. I come up with personal goals having to do with my health, my home, and my walk with God. I suppose I am not alone in this past time. Many of us use this time to look forward and set goals. And while we don’t always get very far on our goals, budgets, and plans to lose weight, it is very important that we keep trying and working and praying. We can’t just give up.

One of the best starts to next year is first taking a few moments to reflect on last year. And so I decided to ask myself a few questions–

Am I closer to the Lord now than I was last year at this time?

What did I do that matters for eternity this past year?

Do I look more like Jesus right now than I did one year ago? Five years ago? Twenty years ago?

You may think I am a little obsessed with the spiritual side of things and I guess you would be right. As I get older, I can’t help but realize that it is really the only thing — long-term– that matters. And, quite honestly, out of my good spiritual health flows other good things–better relationships, self-control, joy.

But we can never manipulate God. And so it can never be our desire to have good spiritual health so that we can get what we want out of life. There is such a push to fulfill ourselves and find our purpose that we can sometimes forget that our purpose is to glorify God. As a believer, my desire is to please Him, not myself.

This takes me back to my goals for the new year. Am I creating these goals for me? Or do I have pleasing God in mind?

I can honestly say that –while there is an element of selfishness in them — more and more I become acutely aware of the fact that lack of self-control is a sin. And this is the main reason why I don’t stop trying to lose weight, to stick to a budget, and to stop wasting time.

God has given me (and you) some incredible resources. The three I specifically think of are our body, our time, and our money. If we don’t intentionally care for these resources they can be frittered away into nothingness (or in the case of our bodies — be enlarged into a great something!)

And this has been my experience on more occasions than I care to admit. And so I keep setting goals. But I try to set them in light of my spiritual health.

Because I want to serve and honor Jesus in this new year. And I cannot do that if I am lacking self-control in my life.

I know lots of people have given up on setting “New Year’s Resolutions”. But I want to encourage you to take a few minutes today for reflection. The new year is a great time to reflect on the past year and to set hopeful goals for the new year. But let’s set those goals with the Lord in mind. And let’s remember that Jesus is by our side as we fight against the sin and bad habits that so easily beset us, ready to strengthen and help us.

Isaiah 41:10

I Corinthians 10:13

2 Corinthians 12:9-10

Psalm 46:1

Just Believe

2 Comments / December 23, 2013 December 23, 2013

This time of year, you hear (and see) the words just believe a lot. Most times it is referring to Santa Claus. But, other times, it is referring to believing in God or in angels. Or something supernatural. Something outside of normal human happenings.

Sometimes these words are followed by the words “in yourself”. Just believe in yourself. Sometimes they are followed with a Bible verse.

The key is believing. It doesn’t seem to really matter these days what you believe, as long as you believe.

The problem lies in the fact that, outside of God’s Word, whatever you believe in seems to consistently change.

Believe in myself?

One day I am strong and courageous and, the next, I am frightened and weak.

Believe in the media?

One day they say vitamins and supplements are critical to a healthy lifestyle, the next they say they cause cancer (yes, I actually just read an article that states this!)

Believe in Santa Claus?

That works until you are about six and can make sense of the fact that, no matter how many times your parents take you to see Santa Claus or how many Christmas movies show Santa weaving Christmas miracles, there is no possible way a big fat man could get down the chimney or visit all those houses on Christmas Eve.

Believe in God?

Of course we believe in God (most of us). But what does that mean? How do we know what to believe? If it is up to me to define who God is, I will make Him into someone I want Him to be. But what if that isn’t who He is? How do I know the Truth about God?

Believe in Jesus?

Which Jesus? The Jesus that the world is preaching– the non-judging, weak Jesus? The one who accepts everyone without condition–no repentance of sin necessary?

It is a confusing world we live in. One day we read one thing and the next we read the opposite. It makes me feel like burying my head in the sand and shouting, “I give up!” Or at least it would, if it wasn’t for one thing–

God’s Word.

For there, and only there, can we truly understand who God is and why Jesus came. Only there does the world and the direction it is going make any sense at all. Only there do we learn fully of God’s plan for His people.

Sure, there are some things that make me uncomfortable in that book. I am hit face to face with my sin there– For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.( Hebrews 4:12)

But I would rather know the truth–about myself, about God, and about the world–than live in a made-up world built of sand.

And so, as we celebrate this Christmas season, I am so very thankful to say that I know what I believe without a shadow of a doubt. I know that God’s Word is Truth, no matter what the rest of the world says. I know that the baby in the manger was born to die–to pay the price for my sins. I know that Jesus lives victorious over sin!

And that foundation is priceless, as we try to discern and process all that is going on around us–in the modern day church, in politics, in our own lives–in fact, in any and all areas.

p.s. If you want to truly understand just how awesome God’s Word is and how it got to us, this sermon is the most wonderful one I have heard on the subject. It was very helpful in reminding me of the reliability and inerrancy and power of God’s Word. I wish every Christian would listen to it.