Struggles – Page 15 – Growing 4 Life

What Kind of Advertisement Are You?

Leave a Comment / January 5, 2015 January 5, 2015

Have you ever seen an unfit, overweight personal trainer? How much confidence would you have in them helping you reach your goals? I am reminded of a shop I was in that had a prominent display for some magic weight loss formula sitting on the counter. Staring up at me were photos of smiling, super-fit people and words that held incredible promises for a changed body. My eyes inevitably swung to the shop owner. It seemed to me that if this wonderful weight loss product worked miracles, this owner would be living proof. But that was not the case.

And I’d be lying if I didn’t say that it rather undermined my confidence in trying that particular product.

And I guess that is exactly how it is when we Christians try to tell people how wonderful Jesus is, all the while standing in a filthy mire of our own making. We don’t trust, we don’t forgive, we love the world, we worry, we use foul and crude language, we walk away from distasteful and unpleasant situations, we lie, we cheat, we quarrel, we envy, we betray, we complain incessantly, we have a bad work ethic, and our entertainment choices are just like everybody else’s. In other words, it would appear as if Jesus just doesn’t make a bit of a difference. Why would we expect someone to want what we have?

Of course, sometimes Christians fail. That is a fact of life. There are lovely, godly people who are divorced, who have spiritually lost their children, and who have had abortions. I am not talking about the past. And I am not talking about the flesh that continues to plague us even after salvation. We do slip in our language sometimes. We go to a movie and realize half-way through that this was definitely a wrong choice. We struggle through forgiving. But the key word is struggle— sincere believers are continually fighting their sin.

What I am talking about are the patterns of sin that are so ingrained in us, we aren’t even aware of them.

What kind of advertisement are we for our Savior? Seriously. Let’s stop for just a minute and think about our last 24 hours. If someone saw where we went, the words we spoke, the entertainment we set before our eyes and ears, and the food and drink we consumed, would they give evidence that we are a follower of Jesus Christ?

There is so much talk about “God looking on the heart”– and so he does–but that doesn’t excuse sinful actions, for out of a pure heart comes a holy life. We certainly do not need works to be saved but our works our evidence that we are saved. (See I John 2:3-6; 2 Peter 1:5-9; Matthew 7:16-20)

You can have righteous actions without a right heart, but you cannot have a right heart without righteous actions. It’s impossible.

I hope and pray that I am a good example of a believer. I mess up so often– especially at home. Many times I don’t even feel qualified to be writing. And yet God leads me on and continues to nudge me to keep writing.

I just know I don’t want anyone to wonder at my funeral whether or not I was a believer. I don’t want any “I think so’s” or “she said a prayer when she was little but…”

Instead, I want people to say with confidence that I was someone who followed hard after God. I am certainly far, far from perfection. Each day brings me deeper and fuller knowledge of just how far, but I want to be going the right direction, without question and without wavering.

I hope that you want the same to be said of you. Because it is only through this that we can make any difference at all. After all, what good are we if we look just like everyone else? If our decisions are made from our feelings and emotions, just like everyone else? If we don’t handle life’s tough situations differently, if we don’t bring integrity to the work place, or love and kindness to our relationships, then we are like that shop owner. We are advertising something that obviously isn’t working.

Just 15 Minutes

Leave a Comment / December 29, 2014 December 29, 2014

How much time does it take to change your life? I think sometimes we drag our feet at putting any change in place, thinking that it will gobble up the precious free hours that we have. We honestly believe that we don’t have time to cook healthy meals or exercise or that we don’t have the time to organize, keep a budget, or read the Bible. Or perhaps we believe we will never have time to learn to play that instrument or learn how to use the computer or read that classic. And so I have a challenge for you (and for me, too!)

It’s simple, really.

15 minutes.

The challenge is to give 15 minutes per day this year to something that you really want to accomplish in your life. If a year seems overwhelming then start with a month.

There are 1440 minutes in each day. We spend about 480 of those minutes sleeping. That leaves 960 minutes to work and play. Surely, we can take just 15 of those 960 to start working on something that really matters to us?

For me, I have decided to take January and tackle some housecleaning jobs that have been neglected. I have made a checklist of small jobs that need to be done around the house that I never seem to get to. None of the jobs will require more than 30 minutes and most will be 15 minutes or less.

I share this here, because I wonder if sometimes we don’t move forward because it just seems so overwhelming. But what if it only took 15 minutes a day?

If we exercise for 15 minutes a day, isn’t that so much better than not at all?

If we focus on our budget for just 15 minutes (or even 5 minutes!) each day, wouldn’t that be so beneficial in tracking our finances?

If we would read our Bible for even 15 minutes per day, that would still add up to 5,475 minutes spent reading our Bibles. That’s over 91 hours spent reading our Bible in one year!

Perhaps change is within our grasp, after all.

A man names Charles Atlas says this: “15 Minutes a Day! Give me just this and I’ll prove I can make you a new man.”

I don’t know anything about Charles Atlas and I don’t know the context of this quote, but what I do know is that this is true. If we would dedicate just 15 minutes a day to something we really want to accomplish, we will accomplish it! Sure, the downside is that it will take us longer to get there, but let’s remember it was the slow and steady tortoise that finished the race in Aesop’s familiar fable.

Of course, I would be amiss if I didn’t mention here that there isn’t anything better you could spend your 15 minutes on than studying God’s Word this next year. I am sure by now you are tired of hearing about the Bible Challenge, but I truly hope you will consider joining me and other Growing 4 Life readers as we read through the Bible chronologically. Or, if not with us, that you will be in God’s Word with another group of friends or your church or even on your own. I am convinced that– while we can change our behavior and our habits–a changed heart can only be accomplished through the work of the Holy Spirit through the reading of God’s Word. There is power in this Book. There is nothing else that could possibly be of more value to you as you head into 2015.

But whatever you choose to spend your 15 minutes a day doing, I know you will feel a great sense of accomplishment at the end of the year (or month) because you stuck it out and have made a change– even if it’s a small one.

Anyone care to join me in the 15 minute challenge?

What If I Don’t “Get” The Bible?

Leave a Comment / December 15, 2014 January 12, 2019

People will sometimes share their hesitation in reading scripture because they just find the Bible uninteresting or so hard to understand. Even if we don’t say it out loud, these thoughts often lurk in the back of our minds, casting a shadow over our best intentions to read the Word.

I’ve been there myself. I, too, have struggled with disinterest, lack of comprehension, and terrible guilt about not loving God’s Word as I ought to as a believer. My lack of love for God’s Word was a big shadow over my Christian life for many years.

And so I started praying about it–asking specifically that God would give me a love for His Word.

And He answered that prayer.

It wasn’t instant and sometimes I still struggle, but He truly has instilled in me a love for scripture. It is just one of the many ways God has proven Himself faithful to me. I am not special. If you ask Him, He will do the same thing for you. There are a few things we can do to prepare our hearts, though, to be receptive to the Word.

We first (and most importantly) need to recognize our sinfulness and be sure to have a humble and submissive spirit when we read. This can take some work in this world of “rights”, with the great focus always on “me”. It’s not how we have been trained to think. I have also found in my own life that it is a purposeful choice that I have to make almost daily. I have not found humility something that I master and then can move on. Pride and selfishness sneak their way in so subtly.

We also need to bring a spirit of obedience– being ready to obey even the things that make us uncomfortable or that may require sacrifice. This can be very difficult and I can truly understand why so many people struggle with this and may even stop reading. Stepping out of our comfort zone and giving up the things we love is never easy– for any reason. But if you are willing to do this, you will not walk away from your Bible reading unchanged. Slowly, but surely, God uses His Word to transform us and make us more Christlike.

I would also like to add here– and this is really important– I do not understand every passage I read in the Bible. There are many moments where I am scratching my head, really puzzled over what a particular passage is saying or why something happened the way it did.

I know at this point, skeptics and scoffers would call me naive and perhaps even ridiculous to keep reading. But here’s the thing–I am okay if I don’t understand everything about God. In fact, if I did understand everything, I would really be bringing Him down to my level– putting Him inside a box of my own finite and limited understanding. The fact that I can’t understand everything is okay with me because I understand enough. And, quite frankly, I have to agree with Mark Twain, who said–

“It ain’t those parts of the Bible that I can’t understand that bother me, it is the parts I do understand.”

I agree. I think many times we are so disconcerted and uncomfortable about what we can understand, that we often use the excuse we can’t understand it as a reason to just give up.

And I will state right here– that is the easier choice. Yes, it is. It is easier to just say we can’t understand it and put it aside. At least it is easier if you are looking only at right now.

At this present moment.

But what I just wish I could help you understand is the great peace and joy and comfort that comes with submitting your life to Christ in all ways, first and foremost by spending time getting to know Him in the Word. I cannot even begin to tell you how God has used His Word in my life.

Again, let me just confirm once more — I am not anything special. I am just a middle-aged mom from Small-town, America. Let me also make sure you understand that I still fight sin and my selfish desires every single day. This is not about me but about what God is doing in me. He can do the same thing for you. I know He can. If you will submit and obey Him. And the first start to that is by getting into His Word.

I am going to pray that this is the year you are given the faith and the courage to pick up your Bible and read it. Really read and study it. If you do, I can promise you that you will never be the same.

Try a Growing4Life Challenge (see menu at the top of this page). All of the challenges can be used during any year. Or try a 2-year plan. Or an inductive study of a single book. Or just take a book of the Bible and read it for 30 days straight.

But do something. I can promise you that you will not be sorry.

Knowing When to Disengage

Leave a Comment / December 11, 2014 December 12, 2014

Christmas is a wonderful time for holiday parties and family reunions. But many of us dread these get-togethers because of the inevitable disagreements and heated discussions that are sure to take place. For some of us, it takes a lot of joy out of the holiday season. I think all of us have had disagreements at one time or other with people. The sin nature we are born with makes it impossible for us all to get along 24/7. Even Christians. Perhaps it is even harder for us because we know that we should get along!

So what happens when you just can’t see eye to eye with someone? I am still growing in this area but I have learned a few things.

First, it is best to ask a few questions–

Does this really matter? Will I care in 50 years? 10 years? Tomorrow?

If I don’t get my own way in this, what will happen?

If I do get my own way, what will it cost me?

If it really doesn’t matter, then it may be time to back down. I am still working on this, but the Lord has really been teaching me. Why argue over something that happened 20 years ago? My memory is terrible and I’ve learned that I am wrong at least 90% of the time.

It is also good to consider the ramifications of winning and losing an argument. We may “win”, but in the process lose respect. And we may lose and find that it doesn’t matter at all.

We can answer these questions quickly and easily in our head to see if we should disengage. Think about all the little stuff that starts arguments and end up turning into grudges that often last a lifetime. Seriously. Families, churches, and work cultures are destroyed over the silliest things.

Does it really matter? Asking this question has really helped me with the inane, unimportant disagreements.

But what about the topics that really do matter? How do we handle debates and discussions we have regarding religion, politics, entertainment, how to raise kids, or treat elderly parents? These conversations encompass abortion, homosexuality, gun control, education, and racism. And we haven’t even mentioned the long-standing disagreements over various biblical doctrines and theology. Let’s face it–there are a lot of things that truly do matter in life. And many of us have very strong opinions about these really important issues. Now what?

We need to consider two things as we take part in these deeper, more philosophical, discussions–

1. How am I presenting myself in this disagreement? What tone am I using? Am I growing frustrated? If you find that your words have become arrogant and rude and the discussion is growing heated, then it is time to step back and disengage yourself from the conversation. We can quickly ruin our Christian testimony by how we handle these situations.

2. Will I change this person’s mind? If the person is adamantly arguing against creation or the right to life or against some other clear principle from God’s Word and you see no softening of the heart and absolutely no interest in your point of view, then it’s time to disengage and pray instead. Never discount prayer. Even the hardest heart can be changed. But it won’t be by you or me. Only God can change a heart. Start praying and always be ready for opportunities that may open for a good, healthy discussion in the future. You just never know when one will be dropped in your lap!

I do offer one word of caution. It is so critical that we look to God’s Word and see what He has to say on these issues. Of course, not all things are crystal clear in scripture, but our opinions should always be drawn first and foremost from the principles within God’s Word or they can do great, long-term damage. Consider Karl Marx or Charles Darwin for just a moment. The strong opinions of these men, drawn from wrong premises, have affected the lives of millions and millions of people in a very negative way. It is so very important that our opinions are based on the Word of God and not drawn from our own human experiences or emotions.

And one final–but extremely important–thought. If we find ourselves in one of these heated discussions, let’s try to assume that the other person may not truly understand just how hurtful their tone sounded or how angry their words were and extend grace. I try to offer this grace to the other person because I know that sometimes I am misunderstood, too, and I hope that people will extend the same grace towards me.

So this holiday season, let’s try to anticipate our family reunions and work parties with great joy, remembering that they do not need to be dominated by unpleasant conversations and heated debates. Let’s disengage ourselves before we sin and instead be a bearer of peace and selflessness this holiday season. And, by all means, let us offer grace and mercy to those who offend us. For that is exactly what the Christ Child did for us, after all.

I Corinthians 13:4-7 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; ⁵does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; ⁶does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; ⁷bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Waiting for “Just Right”

Leave a Comment / December 8, 2014 December 8, 2014

I could feel the socks sinking further down into my boots with each step. About five minutes into my walk, my socks were big lumps underneath my feet. Great. I looked up and saw a bench in the distance and decided I would sit down and try to pull them up as tightly as you can pull ankle socks up, all the while reminding myself that this is exactly why you don’t wear ankle socks with boots.

I got them back to their original positions and tentatively took a few steps. I thought I should be good for a few minutes, but I quickly realized that I was wrong. They were back in their undesired position before I could walk even a half minute down the path.

At this point I had a decision to make. I had three options. I could–

A) Remove the sock.

B) Let them remain uncomfortably wadded at the bottom of my boots.

C) Just stay where I was for the remainder of my days.

Obviously, “C” was not a viable option– although many of us take this option in real-life scenarios, which I’ll explain if you’ll just stay with me a few more minutes here. But back to my options– I was left with A or B. The ground was wet and muddy, with nowhere to sit or lean in sight, making option A a bit perilous, so I settled for option B.

Interestingly enough, by the time I was approaching my house, I realized that I had totally forgotten about the discomfort. My thoughts had taken me elsewhere and I could enjoy the walk even with lumps in my boots.

And I realized that it’s ok. It is ok to walk and not have everything be “just right”.

I have brought this thought process with me to many challenges in my life. It has to be just right for me to work at losing weight, to write a book, to have my quiet time. We all do it. We won’t leave a miserable job until we are forced to, go to church until our spouse joins us, or stick to a budget until it feels like we have enough money. We are waiting for that person to apologize before we forgive, we are waiting for our families to be perfect, before we will change our own attitudes, and we are waiting for our kids to like us, before we will put discipline into place. The interesting thing is that the thing we are waiting to do is often something that would improve our life tremendously.

And I wonder. Is “just right” a trap to keep us from pleasing our heavenly father and living the best life possible while here on earth? Does it keep us stymied in a place of discontent and dissatisfaction, while we wait for our circumstances to come to a point where the thing we want to do will be easy?

How stuck we get in wrong thinking.

This is the time when many of us are starting to think of New Year’s Resolutions and beginning over again. If we are young we enthusiastically set new goals. If middle-age has set in we are, most likely, remembering the days when we used to do that and have caved in to the futility of goal-setting.

But perhaps this is the year. This could be the year that you lose the weight, develop a regular quiet time or read through the Bible (I can help with that here!) or change jobs. Perhaps this is the year that you will create a budget and stick to it. Or organize your photos. Or start cooking for your family. Or forgive.

I don’t know what you are waiting to do. But what I do know is that if you wait for “just right” it will never come. I know this because I’ve been waiting for it for a long time and just when one thing improves another thing rears its ugly head, demanding attention. That is the way of life. We cannot allow it to keep us from growing as a Christian or as a person. We cannot choose Option C, remaining where we are forever. We’d like to choose that because it is comfortable there. The other options take work and we don’t want to work. But Option C isn’t really an option, is it? Because there is no standing still in life. If we aren’t moving forward, then we are sliding backwards.

Perhaps Paul says it best–

Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. Therefore let us, as many as are mature, have this mind; and if in anything you think otherwise, God will reveal even this to you.

Here Paul is talking about moving forward in maturing in Christ Jesus. But many of our goals will help us do that, won’t they? Controlling our appetites, teaching our children to obey, forgiving, being organized or sticking to a budget (which shows that we are a good steward of our material possessions and time) are all good steps to take as we strive to grow as believers.

I think my walk helped me realize that I can still move forward with a goal, even if everything isn’t lined up just the way I think it should be. Sure, my goal or the change I want to make may require a little more creativity, but that’s okay! In fact, it may even be more rewarding that way. Let’s not give up trying to change. Let’s not swallow the lie that things will never change. With some perseverance, through the work of the Holy Spirit, we can change. So get busy making a few goals. Go. Do it now.

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Understanding Our Riches

Leave a Comment / November 28, 2014 May 30, 2017

I don’t know how old you have to be to remember the show “Beverly Hillbillies.” It is a silly show, tilled with innocent humor and pointless plots, telling the tale of a hillbilly family that struck it rich.

The first verse of the theme song goes like this–

Come and listen to a story about a man named Jed
A poor mountaineer, barely kept his family fed,
Then one day he was shootin at some food,
And up through the ground came a bubblin crude.
Oil that is, black gold, Texas tea.

Jed and his family were actually very rich for a very long time before he even realized it, because there was oil underneath the ground where he and his family lived. His ignorance did not make his wealth any less valid or true.

I was reading in Ephesians this morning (Oh, how I love that little epistle!) and came across these verses–For this reason I bow my knees to the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ,^[c] ¹⁵from whom the whole family in heaven and earth is named, ¹⁶that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with might through His Spirit in the inner man, ¹⁷that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, ¹⁸may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the width and length and depth and height— ¹⁹to know the love of Christ which passes knowledge; that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.

²⁰Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us, ²¹to Him be glory in the church by Christ Jesus to all generations, forever and ever. Amen. (Ephesians 3:14-21)

And I was just struck by the knowledge that we have so much in Christ. And yet we live like we have so little. So often we are just like Jed, living as a spiritual pauper. We work our way through the swampy mess of our lives, relying on our own resources and strength. When that runs out we turn to worldly philosophies and counselors. And then when that doesn’t work, we often build walls and hide behind them. But these verses tell us that our strength and riches come from Jesus Christ. And that He is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think! This isn’t talking about selfish requests focused on material goods and a comfortable, pleasant life. Earlier in Ephesians Paul tells us–

For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them. (Ephesians 2:10)

When we are saved we are filled with the desire to please God. This isn’t a requirement, it’s just a fact. What doesn’t change is our fleshly desire to please ourselves. And so with salvation comes a huge battle and many of us are not prepared to fight it. We either cave to the temptation of our lusts or we fight it with earthly tactics and humanistic techniques.

And yet God tells us in Ephesians that God can accomplish greater things than we can ever imagine through His power in us. We can have victory! Oh, most times it doesn’t come easy and we have to work hard. While God miraculously changes sinful desires in some people, most times it is tiny step by tiny step forward.

But I think the thing I found encouraging is that if we are walking with the Lord in obedience, we can expect victory! Paul goes on in Ephesians to clearly explain what a truly saved and transformed life does and does not look like. If our lives are filled with the things that are of the flesh, we should not expect victory. We can’t live willfully in sin and expect God to work great things in us. That is why so many of us flounder as spiritual paupers, when, in truth, we are quite rich!

Today is a good day to examine your heart. I know that I had much confession to do this morning, as I read Ephesians and realized how I have been allowing some things to take a hold in my heart that shouldn’t be there. I don’t want to live as a spiritual pauper. I want to live as the spiritually rich and very loved person I am in Christ! If you are His, I am sure you want the same. May we all continue to fight the flesh that wars within us by the power of Christ in us! We are on the winning side. Victory is ours through Christ Jesus. Let’s not forget it!

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No Personality Transplant Required (for women only)

Leave a Comment / November 17, 2014 November 17, 2014

I usually try to write for any Christian. But today’s post is just for women. Of course, men can certainly read it, but I don’t think they will really get it. I heard something yesterday in church and felt like I just had to write about it, because I am thinking that it may not just be me that struggles with this particular concern.

We Christian women have been hearing the phrase “gentle and quiet spirit” forever. For years and years, I have felt so incredibly guilty because I am just. not.

Really, it has been one of the most discouraging things ever for me. I naturally tend to take charge (even when I’m not asked) and I can talk too much, if I’m not very careful. I am not gentle. Or quiet. And I struggle with being submissive, too. There. I said it. (You can click here for my post on submission. I won’t write much about that today).

I used to watch Christian women who were “gentle and quiet” — at least in how they portrayed themselves in public– and get a little jealous. Why couldn’t I be more like them? Dignified. Quiet. Even shy.

As I have gotten older, I have gained a much deeper understanding into this. I have seen “godly” women–quiet, shy ones– who years later are not exhibiting much fruit. Their kids have walked away from the Lord. They aren’t really ministering in any area of their lives. Or I have found out that they are pernicious gossips behind the scenes. Of course, there are many quiet, shy women who are truly lovely women of God. And that’s really the whole point. But I’m getting a little ahead of myself here.

So let’s go back to what I heard yesterday in church. We watched a video in our ladies’ Sunday School class that really brought this all together in my mind. At one point, Nancy Leigh DeMoss said something like she believed for a long time that she would need a personality transplant in order to be godly woman. She just knew she didn’t have a quiet and gentle spirit. I had never heard the struggle put that exact way before, but as soon as she said it, I could totally and completely relate. It struck something deep inside me.

In many ways, I have felt like I have left my Savior down, my family down, and my church down just by being me. I have felt like it is impossible to be a godly woman.

But here’s the thing–

Perhaps we haven’t defined the words correctly. I remember that when I wrote the Sermon on the Mount in a Nutshell post that I was surprised by the actual meaning of those verses in Matthew 5. All my life I had defined certain terms in that passage completely wrong–words like “mourn” and “meek.”. Perhaps the same thing has been true of these words “gentle” and “quiet”.

And logic would dictate that if we start with the wrong definition, we end up with the wrong conclusion.

So let’s define these words, using the specific Greek terms (keep in mind that I am no Greek scholar by any means)–

πραέως (praus): This difficult-to-translate root (pra-) means more than “meek.” Biblical meekness is not weakness but rather refers to exercising God’s strength under His control – i.e. demonstrating power without undue harshness; humble.

[The English term “meek” often lacks this blend – i.e. of gentleness (reserve) and strength.]

ἡσυχίου (hescuchios): (an adjective derived from hēsyxos, “quiet, stillness”) – properly, quiet (still), i.e. steady (settled) due to a divinely-inspired inner calmness; (“calmly quiet”) describes being “appropriately tranquil” by not misusing (or overusing) words that would stir up needless friction (destructive commotion).

As we read these definitions, we begin to understand that being gentle and quiet has absolutely nothing to do with our personality and everything to do with surrendering our will to God’s and living obediently, according to His Word.

You see, this verse is for all of us. As we mature, we should be cloaked in “divinely-inspired inner calmness”– whether we are an introvert or an extrovert. As we grow up in the Lord, we should be demonstrating humility.

And let’s keep in mind that being an extrovert does not mean one is filled with pride, just as being an introvert does not mean one is filled with humility. A quiet person can easily be more prideful than a talkative one. Sometimes we get a little confused on this.

NOW– all that being said– there are some things we need to face.

No matter what personality we have been given by God (Psalm 139:13), it can be used for God’s glory or for our own. Challenges abound for us, no matter what our natural bents are. The key is to recognize the area in which we struggle and, by the help of the Holy Spirit, to work at changing it.

For example, a strong personality may struggle with speaking words at the appropriate time while an introvert may struggle with developing the courage to speak words at all. One woman may struggle with responding with love and compassion, while another may struggle with enabling people in their struggles.

We need to recognize that God has uniquely designed (and blessed) us with the gifts, talents, and quirks that we have. And, along with that, we need to realize that each and every one of us– no matter what our personality is– has struggles and victories and needs and blessings.

No matter what personality we have been given, we have the glorious opportunity of using it to honor and glorify Christ. So let’s make sure that we grab that opportunity and, by God’s great grace and mercy, use it to the best of our ability.

If you have found this post helpful, I would sure appreciate if you would share it. Thank you!

Oswald Bunny and a Lesson Learned

Leave a Comment / November 13, 2014 November 13, 2014

We were exploring Hollywood Studios, Disney’s movie-themed park when everyone decided it was time to ride the Tower of Terror. I thought briefly about going along but then realized that I would enjoy wandering around the park by myself much more than standing in line for a ride I wasn’t even sure I’d like. And so I wished my family well and told them I’d meet up with them in an hour.

I first stopped at a little bookstore set back away from the crowd. I paged through a few books, especially enjoying the first few pages of a biography about Walt Disney. I made a note of the author and then moved on. I then came to the Walt Disney: One Man’s Dream attraction. I enjoyed seeing the journey of this man and his “empire”, from its humble beginnings to its present state. The one thing that really stuck with me was Oswald Bunny.

Oswald Bunny was a character that Walt had created in his early years. Around 1928, through a series of unfortunate and hurtful events, Oswald Bunny was stolen. Not only that, but Walt also lost many of his best employees through the fiasco. Was this the end of his dreams as an animated artist? Of course, we know it was not.

Instead of drowning in his sorrows and giving up, Walt went on that same year to come up with another original idea. As he was riding on a train with his wife, he told her his idea of a mouse he wanted to call Mortimer. She suggested the name “Mickey”, as the name “Mortimer” sounded too pretentious. And thus was born the famous Mickey Mouse. While Oswald the Bunny faded into obscurity, Mickey Mouse became the icon of all that is Disney.

Now why am I sharing this history?

Because the one thing I took from this particular event in Walt Disney’s life is his perseverance through hurt and trials. While I have no idea if Walt was a believer or not, I think we can definitely learn something from him about perseverance.

Perseverance: steadfastness in doing something despite difficulty or delay in achieving success.

So, how does this relate to our Christian walk specifically? In 2 Peter 1:5-9, we can see that, if we want to avoid spiritual blindness and stumbling, perseverance is a necessary trait. But perseverance can be quite challenging to develop in our own lives. It is so tempting to give up in the midst of trials or when we can’t see any success in the near future. This has probably gotten so much worse with the event of this age, where if things don’t work instantly, they are quickly abandoned.

So how do we develop godly perseverance in our own lives? I believe there are a few key ways–

1. Don’t compare yourself to others.

It is so easy to look at someone else’s success and just want to give up. But there will always be someone more successful than you are. We need to keep our eyes focused on the ministry, the spiritual growth, and the duties that God has set before us, instead of focusing on others.

2. Don’t measure your success by how much applause and praise you get from mere mortals.

As I write this, I think of some of the great missionaries who sacrificed all to go to pagan lands a hundred or more years ago. When they arrived in these foreign countries, the natives were not falling all over themselves to hear the gospel. Instead, these missionaries practiced much perseverance, receiving little praise or glory. The fruits of their perseverance are evident today, but they weren’t very evident during their ministry. They persevered, anyway.

By the way, If you haven’t read any missionary biographies, I highly recommend doing so. They are so interesting and so much more useful to our Christian growth than romance novels. Some of the most interesting and life-changing that I’ve read are the stories of Gladys Aylward, Isobel Kuhn, George Muller, Amy Carmichael, and Gracia Burnham.

3. Keep your eyes focused on the Lord.

Sometimes, when we receive no praise and glory and we see the successes of others, it is tempting to start relying on our own human deductions. Thoughts like “This isn’t worth it” or “I will never be able to get over this in my past” or “this ministry will never be successful” crowd our mind and we give up. Instead, we need to continue to trust the Lord, ask Him to guide and confirm that we are in His will, and then continue on. We need to turn away from the thoughts of discouragement that plague us and instead keep our eyes fixed on Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith.

4. Learn from our painful moments.

When we are most hurt or embarrassed or torn apart is when we are most vulnerable to the voice that tells us to give up. But instead of giving up, we need to turn to the Lord for comfort and guidance, asking the Lord specifically what He wants us to learn from this time and then be humble enough to learn it. Sometimes, we do need to give up a favorite project or ministry. The key is being able to discern when that is. And, of course, we are never to give up on growing more like Jesus. So that is never even an option.

5. Be careful how you define success.

In this day and age of social media and quickly rising stars, we have to be careful in how we define success as Christians. If you can help even one person understand salvation, is that not a great success for the Lord? The Bible says that the angels rejoice when even one sinner repents! (Luke 15:10)

Sometimes we rely a little too heavily on the numbers. You can even see so many pastors fall prey to this line of thinking, as they become obsessed over the attendance numbers instead of focused on growing the sheep that are already in their fold. But can we overestimate the value of even one soul coming to know the Lord or growing closer to Him through your ministry? If even one person is changed by your ministry, is that not worth it?

Perseverance is really not a popular concept these days, but may I encourage you (and myself, too!) to keep on keeping on. If you are discouraged– as a ministry worker, as a parent, as a pastor or pastor’s wife, or just simply as a believer– then turn your eyes to Jesus and keep your eyes focused on eternity.

The Pitfalls of Living by Feeling

Leave a Comment / October 31, 2014 October 31, 2014

The following is written by Erwin Lutzer. If you are struggling with loving someone, forgiving someone, or a bad habit you just can’t seem to kick, this is well-worth your time–

Before I suggest how you can cope with your emotions, I want you to consider what happens when you live by the dictates of your own hunches and whims. A life based on desires is an invitation to the sin of disobedience. Often our feelings run counter to what God requires. In fact, most sinful habits are developed by simply following the path of least resistance, by doing whatever we feel like doing. Many of our struggles can be traced to sensuality, and by that I mean being controlled by our physical senses. This spawns defeat, self-absorption, and unbelief. Many people who think they cannot obey God’s commandments simply don’t feel like obeying. Occasionally they have days when they wake up wanting to do what God requires— but not often. Our fallen human nature never feels like obeying God; usually it wants to do its own thing. This attitude comes from Satan as he suggests to us— as he did to Eve— that God has asked us to obey commands that we cannot or need not keep. If we think we can’t obey God until we feel like it, we will never get off the ground in our spiritual lives.

Let’s be specific. In his book on overcoming difficulties in marriage, Jay Adams writes of a particular counseling situation in which all love had been drained from the marriage and the partners had already agreed to a divorce. Neither one had committed a serious sin against the marriage. They just didn’t feel in love anymore. They went to the counselor hoping he would confirm their decision that since there was no feeling left, they should divorce. The couple was shocked to find the counselor saying, “If you don’t love each other, there is only one thing to do: You will have to learn to love one another.” The couple was incredulous. “How can you learn to love someone? You can’t produce feelings out of thin air!” The counselor explained that in the Bible, God commands us to love one another. When the husband was told that he should love his wife as Christ loved the church, he gasped. He could never do that. But the counselor persisted. He explained that the husband should begin on a lesser level. The Bible also commands us to love our neighbor, and since his wife is his closest neighbor, he should love her. But even so, the husband rejected the idea that he could love his wife that way. Then the counselor explained that he was still not off the hook, for God had commanded us to love even our enemies! This couple had made a common error; they had equated love with feelings. In the Bible, love is not a feeling. We can learn to love, even though we begin with little or no emotional impetus. In other words, we can choose to love. And God gives us the grace to do so.

Love is not an emotion; neither is forgiveness. The Bible commands us to put away all bitterness (Eph. 4: 31); we are to forgive others whether they solicit our forgiveness or not (v. 32). Yet many Christians believe that they can’t forgive until they feel like it! They think that if they forgive when they don’t feel like it, they are hypocritical. However, if forgiveness were an emotion, God would be commanding us to do the impossible. We cannot switch our emotions on and off. We cannot develop the right feelings on our own. But God is not mocking us when He tells us to forgive; we can choose to do so, whether we feel like it or not. Never try to skirt God’s commands under the pretense that you don’t feel like obeying Him. A second danger of living by feelings is that you may tend to derive your doctrine from feelings. If you believe God is with you just because “He feels so close,” you will also believe there are days when He forsakes you because “He feels so far away.” The assurance of God’s presence does not come by feelings, but by faith (Heb. 13: 5). Fortunately, you don’t always have to feel God’s presence to be in fellowship with Him and to make spiritual progress.

Lutzer, Erwin W. (2010-01-01). Getting to No: How to Break a Stubborn Habit (p. 104). David C Cook. Kindle Edition.

Dealing with Difficult People: Part 2

Leave a Comment / October 30, 2014 October 30, 2014

Difficult people. We all have them in our lives. How do we wrestle with impossible, unpleasant situations over which we have no control? How do we work through the anger and the frustration and the hopelessness when someone keeps hurting us–over and over again. I have really been thinking about this a lot lately.

If you are a regular reader, you may remember Part 1. You can read it here. If you haven’t read it, I suggest you do. What I wrote there truly revolutionized how I view difficult people in my life. It was written a few months ago and it was never intended to have a Part 2. However, God has led me to think further about this topic that is so painful and affects so many people. This is my first paragraph from Part 1–

Have you ever had to deal with someone you just couldn’t make happy? Or perhaps it is someone who lies constantly, is consistently unkind, or very angry? Or maybe they just absolutely exhaust you by telling you all of their woes? Sometimes, if they are friends, we can gently extricate ourselves from these relationships. But, many times, we can’t. We may go to church together. Or we may work together. More often than not, our difficult relationships are within our own families.

If you can relate to this, then I think you will find this post helpful. I would like to share some specific steps we can take to work through a never-ending and seemingly hopeless situation. Notice I did not say “easy” steps. But we need to remember that oftentimes the hardest steps yield the greatest rewards. And if you can take these steps–one slow step at a time– I promise that the bitterness that is welling inside you will dissipate and you will grow stronger spiritually. I can promise you this because these steps are straight from scripture.

1. Submit to God’s sovereignty in your life. This is the first step we need to take in any difficult and troubled situation. It is how we need to view any frustrating and annoying person we come across. We can never change someone else, so we need to instead turn our eyes to God and recognize that He has allowed this person or situation in our life for a reason. It is probably to help us grow more like Christ. We can shake our fist at God and rail that it isn’t fair or we can submit humbly and ask God what He wants to teach us through this. Both attitudes have consequences. If we choose to be angry, then we will grow hard and bitter. If we choose to submit, we will be filled with the peace that passeth understanding. It is our choice. Of course, Romans 8:28-30 is perfect for this idea of God’s Sovereignty but also check out Philippians 1:6 and Romans 5:1-5.

2. Love and forgive the other person(s). So, I know this one is a whole lot easier to write than it is to do. But I didn’t come up with this one on my own. This comes straight from the pages of scripture. Check out Matthew 5:44-48 and Luke 6:27. And then turn to Matthew 6:14-15 and Ephesians 4:31-32. There are many more. I just picked a couple. It would seem that loving our enemies and forgiving them are a pretty big part of a genuine Christian faith. We don’t have a choice here.

So how do we do this? I am going to share something that has helped me tremendously. When I am at the end of myself and have no love to offer or forgiveness to extend, I ask the Lord to fill me with His love and forgiveness for that person. And He answers that prayer! You see, sometimes we are humanly incapable of giving that love and forgiveness. But God is all-powerful and He has provided the Holy Spirit to guide and strengthen us. He will help us. Keep in mind that this is not a once and done thing. It is often a prayer that we need to pray for weeks, months, or even years. But don’t stop asking. And He won’t stop answering.

3. Surround yourself with godly people who will build you up. When we are struggling and suffering, it’s important we don’t fall prey to the very human temptation to hang out with those who will help us point a finger of blame, talk unkindly about the other person, and excuse our sinful attitudes. Instead, surround yourself with friends who will encourage you to respond correctly and biblically. Look up Proverbs 27:5-6 and Proverbs 13:20.

Again, not easy. I know when I am really upset, the last thing I want is someone telling me what the Bible says. And, look, I’m not talking about one of those friends who annoyingly always seems to have the answer and is quite arrogant in the way they give it to you. With friends like that who needs enemies?? No, I am talking about a true and wise friend who will listen and empathize, pray with you and for you, and will lovingly challenge your sinful attitudes.

4. Don’t allow Satan to get a foothold in your life because of this situation. This is best done by controlling our thought life! When we feel our thoughts spiraling out of control, we need to consciously choose to think about something else. We need to carefully refuse to let our thoughts take us down to that dark pit where we feel hopeless and full of despair. We need to very purposefully turn away from the angry and bitter thoughts that can so easily consume us. Honestly, this takes work and a lot of prayer but it does get easier! Check out Ephesians 4:26-27 and 2 Timothy 2:22-26.

5. Be thankful. This can be tough. These situations can utterly and completely take over our lives. So grab yourself an empty notebook and start a thankful journal. You will be shocked at how much you have for which to be truly thankful. God has blessed all of us in a myriad of ways. Start writing it down and see how this little exercise in gratitude helps to move your focus from your woes to your blessings. I Thessalonians 5:18 and Ephesians 5:20 are just two of many verses in scripture about gratitude.

I hope these steps help you. It won’t be instant and it won’t be easy, but if you can follow them, I truly believe God will work in your heart and your life to grow you tremendously through this trial. An added bonus will be the ability to become that friend who can help others when you get to the other side of this trial. You will really be able to understand the challenges faced by someone going through a similar situation and will be able to be used by God in a mighty way– if you choose to submit instead of shaking your fist. If you choose to be thankful instead of bitter. If you choose to grow instead of staying stuck in the mud.

Victory can be yours! This is not a hopeless situation! But, as always, the choice lies with you. No one else can make it for you. No, you can’t change the other person, but you can take steps to work on your own heart. If we choose to submit and obey, blessing will surely follow!