Mending Fences (Part 4)

4 Comments / December 14, 2018

Many years ago, Eliza hurt Evie in an indescribably painful way. It has been years since they talked. Today it Part 4 of this tragic story–one that is all too common in so many families. Is this dynamic part of the fabric of your family life? Will everyone in your family be around the Christmas table this year? Is there anything you can do to change that? Is there forgiveness you can offer to someone? Is there a grudge you need to release? Or perhaps you need to extend a heartfelt apology? We can’t control the other person’s response to us. But we can, like Eliza, reach out and do our part. 

Romans 12:18 says “If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.” Is there anything we can do during this holiday season to make sure we are living out this verse with our own families, friends, co-workers, and church family?

A little encouragement for today before we get into our story. And now–are you ready for Part 4? (Click here to read the rest of the story)

______________________________

      The phone rang and I anxiously looked at the caller ID, praying I’d see my sister’s name. It had been eight weeks since I had sent the letter and hope still surged in me every time I heard the phone ring. But I hadn’t received a phone call, a letter, or an email with any indication that she had even gotten the letter. In fact, it was like I hadn’t even sent it.
      I answered the call and took care of a minor situation at work. It was my day off again and I had arranged to pick up Mom and meet Greta for lunch close to her school. It was almost Christmas now and holiday decorations and lights were everywhere. I loved this time of year!
      I climbed in my Honda Accord and put on some Bing Crosby in preparation for Mom. She just loved listening to the tunes from her past. Especially the holiday ones. I think they reminded her of better days.
      In an hour, Mom was in my car and we were driving as sporadic snowflakes fell around the car. The weatherman was calling for a couple of inches of snow later on in the day. I glanced up at the leaden sky, hoping it would hold off until we were all home.
      Greta was waiting for us at the restaurant. I held on to Mom’s arm as I led her over to the booth.
      “Hi, Mom! Hi, Grandma!” Greta gave her a warm hug.
      “Oh, hello, dear! How are you doing?” Mom’s face always lit up in Greta’s presence.
      After ordering hamburgers and fries, we started talking about the holidays while we sipped on our cokes. It had been just the three of us since Dad had died and we chatted about our normal Christmas traditions. Greta suggested we start some new ones.
      “I think we should build a gingerbread house. How about it, Gram? You want to help?”
      “Sure, dear. I’ll do what I can. I used to make some pretty good gingerbread in my day. I wonder if I can remember how?” Mom’s brow crinkled as she tried to remember her recipe. As she and Greta talked about gingerbread, I thought of all of the heartache I had caused her and almost started to cry. Ever since I had sent that letter I seemed to be just a little more emotional. I just wished Evie would answer one way or another. But my hope was starting to dwindle now.
      “Mom, are you okay?” Greta knew me so well.
      “Sure,” I gave a wry smile.
      “Gram, Mom just hasn’t been herself recently. Do you know what’s going on?”
      “I do not, but I most certainly agree with you. I have been thinking the same thing. What is wrong, Eliza? You haven’t been yourself for weeks now,” Mom’s direct question made me squirm. Why couldn’t I be a better actress? I really did not want to have this discussion.
      “I’m okay—” I started.
      With those words, my mom grabbed my hands and her green eyes—so like Evie’s—grew very serious as she looked straight at me, “Honey, it’s alright to say you’d rather not say but it is not okay to lie.”
      I looked at her. And then at Greta. And then I sighed as one small tear made its way down the right side of my face.
      “Mom, what’s going on?”
      “Alright. I’ll tell you. I decided to send Evie a letter, asking her one last time to forgive me. I thought it might be my Christmas gift to you both. But that was eight weeks ago now and she hasn’t even bothered to respond. I guess I just need to realize that our relationship will never be healed. It is what it is. But it’s hard.”
      Mom sighed and then said these wise words: “You know something I have learned through the years? Forgiveness is a two-way street. You can’t force someone to forgive you. You did the right thing and I’m proud of you. The ball is in Evie’s court now. Why don’t we pray for her right now?”
      And so we lifted Evie up to the Lord right there in the restaurant booth, begging God to help her to forgive me. Asking Him to soften her heart so that we could tell her what He had done for us.
      
      

Is There More Than One Way to Interpret Scripture?

5 Comments / December 10, 2018

A few weeks ago, a friend asked me this question: How do I respond to those who say we can interpret scripture however we want? She had been talking with someone and they had claimed that there are many interpretations to scripture and people just interpret the Bible however they want to make it fit with their viewpoint. While the second half of that sentence is true (people try to make the Bible say whatever they want), it is the first part of this sentence that I want to examine today: Is there more than one interpretation?

This is a great battle in Christendom today because almost all false Gospels rely on the answer to this question being yes. If we desire to stick to the traditional view of the Word, we will often have to deal with people saying to us: Well, that’s your interpretation.

So let’s take a look at this so that, hopefully, we will be a little more prepared the next time someone makes a statement like this.

If you write a letter to someone, does it have one meaning? Or are there several?

When you were in high school or college, did your teacher claim that there was more than one interpretation of the Iliad and the Odyssey? Or Shakespeare? To any other literary source?

They did not. Because there isn’t.

While there may be principles and applications that we can find under the surface of any written work, there is never a completely different meaning.

But for some reason, people use an argument they would never use for any other written work. If we remember that the Holy Bible is God’s very word, inspired and inerrant, then we can understand their need to have more than one interpretation. For this is how a rebellious man can do a work-around and still call himself a Christian.

And we can see—as we have seen in the past few years—that the Bible can be twisted to mean anything anyone wants if we disregard the normal approaches to understanding written documents.

2 Timothy 2:15 counsels us to correctly handle the Word of Truth. This then would lead us to the understanding that there is a right and a wrong way to interpret scripture.

John MacArthur puts it this way in regards to scripture interpretation: “You can be right and I can be wrong or I can be right and you can be wrong or we can both be wrong. But we can’t both be right.”

Exactly.

We have a grave responsibility to use proper hermeneutics to figure out what each passage’s proper interpretation is. (Hermeneutics is the study of the principles and methods of interpreting the text of the Bible.)

I am almost finished with Roy Zuck’s Basic Bible Interpretation (one of the resources I will recommend below) and he says this:

“Interpreting the Bible is one of the most important issues facing Christians today. It lies behind what we believe, how we live, how we get on together, and what we have to offer the world.”

Interpreting the Bible correctly is key.

So how can we be sure that we interpret the Bible correctly? What are the steps? First, there are some qualifications for us:

  1. We must be regenerated. We read in I Corinthians 2:14 that the natural man cannot understand the things of God. So in order to interpret and study scripture correctly, we must be saved. Not only does God open our spiritual eyes upon our salvation but it is also at this time that we are indwelled by the Holy Spirit. He is our Helper in all things, including scripture interpretation (John 14:26).
  2. We must be humble. If we come to the scriptures with a proud heart we will severely limit our capability in understanding God’s Word (Proverbs 16:5). A proud heart leads to an unwillingness to surrender our will to the Father’s. Instead, we find ourselves looking for scripture to promote our ideas and our agendas. This has led to many a wrong interpretation.
  3. We must be reverent and sober-minded. If we have a lackadaisical and careless attitude towards the Holy Word of God (2 Timothy 3:15) we will have the same attitude in interpreting it.
  4. We must be willing to obey all that we read. Ahhh. So now we get to the heart of the matter. We must be willing to obey. If we take a look at almost any twisting of God’s Word or false system that uses Bible verses, what do we see? We will always see obedience to only part of God’s Word. Usually, the parts that elevate, bless, or otherwise make their lives easier. The parts that are hard, that are negative, or that require one to look and be different than the world are soundly ignored. Scripture can only be interpreted correctly if we are willing to obey it in full. (Psalm 119:1-16)
  5. We must approach the scriptures with sound judgment and reason. We must seek to be objective rather than subjective. We must try, as best we can, to come without prejudice or preconceived notions.
  6. We must pray. We must ask the Lord to give us insight and lead us to the correct understanding of what we are studying. We must recognize that, in and of ourselves, we are helpless and hopeless. We need His help and guidance for all things.

Now that we know how we should personally approach the scripture, let’s take a brief look at the best way to interpret the scripture—

  1. It should be interpreted literally. This means that it should be interpreted in its most natural form. If you pick up a letter from a friend, you are not looking for hidden meanings or allegories. You are reading it and taking it for what it means.
  2. It should be interpreted in context. This means we take some time to study the entire passage, we determine the author and who they were writing to, we find out why they were writing to that group or individual. We must study the verses surrounding the favorite verse. We must find out all we can about the context of the passage. It is only after studying these things and understanding the context that we can then look for principles to apply to our own lives.
  3. It should be interpreted with regard to its historical understanding. In the recent years, we have so many “new interpretations”. Tossing tradition and rules out the window has led to a completely different kind of Christianity. But Paul makes it clear that we should pay attention to what has been historically taught when he writes this in 2 Thessalonians 2:15: Therefore, brethren, stand fast and hold the traditions which you were taught, whether by word or our epistle.

Dividing God’s Word rightly takes work. I believe whole-heartedly that much of the error and heresy we see in the church today is due in great part to people not being willing to learn the Word for themselves. I find myself talking to more and more people who want to base their interpretation of scripture on how they feel (I just can’t believe in a God who…) or on what they have been taught by a teacher (But my teacher says…)

Whenever these two things become our guidelines we are in grave danger. Feelings have their place, after all they were created by God. They are not evil. And teachers can be most helpful to us. They can make us think and they can open our eyes. But we must, in a mature and objective manner, take responsibility for our own learning of the scriptures. We must leave milk behind us and feed on meat, always growing in our knowledge of the Word (Hebrews 5:13).

I hope that this has been helpful. There is so much that could be said regarding this subject and I feel like I have been woefully inadequate in what I have written here–like I barely scratched the surface. I will add some resource links below for those of you who would like to study this subject in a deeper way.

 

HELPFUL RESOURCES:

Principles of Interpretation by Pastor Dean Good

Got Questions: What is Biblical Hermeneutics?

Basic Bible Interpretation by Roy B. Zuck

 

 

Mending Fences (Part 3)

Leave a Comment / December 7, 2018

This is Part 3 of this year’s Christmas story. You know, we can find forgiveness from God for the most horrible of sins, but that doesn’t mean we don’t still deal with the consequences. One of the most devastating consequences of sin are destroyed families. And they are all around us. Join me today as we continue the story of two sisters who are struggling through this very thing. (If you have landed on this story for the first time today, you can find Parts 1 & 2 here.)

      “Good morning, Mom! Didn’t you ever go to bed?” Greta said brightly, waking me up with her words.
      I groggily looked around me and realized that I was still on the sofa where I had relived those awful years over again in my mind the night before. I smiled at that baby girl, who was now so grown up.
      “Good morning, sweetheart. What’s on your schedule today?”
      “I have two classes and then I will be at work for the dinner shift. I’ll just study at the library in between classes today.” Greta was in her second year at the community college nearby and also worked at a local restaurant.
      “Hope you have a wonderful day!” I gave her a big hug as I raised myself out of the comfortable corner of the couch that had been my bed the night before.
      “You, too, Mom. What are you doing today?”
      “That’s a good question,” I laughed. I had off work today and I was still thinking through what I wanted to get done.
      Greta headed out the door and I walked to the kitchen to make a cup of coffee. Still in my clothing from last night and looking rather rumpled, I looked rather like a vagabond.
      After breakfast and a shower, I decided I’d go see my mom. She lived in an assisted living community nearby. She had never really recovered after Dad died 15 years ago. She had never been that strong and his sudden death from a heart attack had left her heartbroken and in a weakened physical state. About eight years ago now, I had arranged for her to go to Good Shepherd Assisted Living.
      It was around that same time that I started attending Trinity Bible Church, located a couple of blocks from where we lived. I am not sure what drove me to go to church on that particular Sunday but I knew I needed something to help me with the horrible guilt I had lived with since that fateful night. It had weighed me down like a million pound rock!
      It was through Pastor Jack and his wife, Patty, that I would find out about God’s forgiveness. They opened the Bible and showed me from its pages how Jesus had died for me and that no matter what sin I had committed, forgiveness was available for me. It had taken me several months to actually believe that I could be forgiven for something so awful. But when I finally repented and surrendered my life to Jesus that million pound rock rolled right off my shoulders! I hadn’t even realized how heavy it was until it was gone.
      Greta was saved just a few months after I was and then Mom shortly after that. All three of us had been going to TBC ever since and, within a year, that small church on the corner was like the extended family we never had. It was there that we grew in our faith through the expository preaching of the Word and the discipleship of those who were more mature in the faith. I thanked God most every day for His kindness in leading me to that truth-teaching church and showing me the way to salvation.
      Since coming to know the Lord, the one thing that had really been on my mind was my sister. A few years after I was saved, I read Romans and came across this small, powerful verse towards the end of chapter 12: If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men. And I found myself wondering if I had done everything possible to be at peace with my sister?
      This time of year was especially hard. October was when we’d have so much fun preparing for the holidays in Dad’s store. Every year I thought about reaching out to her and every year I chickened out. I just knew she would reject me again and I wasn’t sure I could bear it.
      California had treated her well. She had a great job and had ended up marrying a guy named Mark. They had had three kids. Two boys and a girl. I only knew this because she communicated occasionally with Mom. But poor Mom had never even met her grandkids. Their happy faces were in frames on the wall of her small apartment but she had never heard their voices or put her arms around them.
      I felt responsible for this, too. Evie was still so angry with me that she hadn’t even brought her kids to meet their Grandma. Oh, the burden was so hard to bear. The Lord, in His awesome grace and mercy, had taken away the guilt and the shame, but I still lived with the pain and the devastating consequences. They would always be with me, I imagined. The only good to come from that awful time was Greta. Oh, how I thanked the Lord for my precious daughter. She was the one and only bright spot in the whole affair.
      What if you would just try just one last time to reach out to Evie?
      The thought came unbidden and totally unexpectedly. Could I risk it? But what was I even risking? She couldn’t reject me any more than she already had. Surely, it would be worth at least trying—if not just for Mom’s sake.
      Yes. I would try.
      “But it won’t work,” my mind insisted.
      The memory of the last time I had tried to apologize came rushing back. It was shortly before Dad had died. I had called her for the third and final time in my efforts to make things right. But before I could even get one sentence out she had firmly said in a stone-cold voice that she would never, ever forgive me and to never call her again.
      I never had.
      But that was fifteen years ago now. Since that time, she had gotten married and had three kids. Would she see things a little differently now? Since Bryce had been born she called Mom a lot more often. Maybe she was changing, too. Like I was.
      I decided to sit down and write her a letter before I lost my courage. I called Mom and told her I’d be a little later than I had planned and then sat down to write. I read and re-read the letter. I erased and re-wrote. I crumpled the first and then the second and third drafts in my hand and threw them in the trash. But, finally, I had penned this letter–

Dear Evie—

I have been wanting to write this letter for such a long time now. Nineteen years ago I sinned against you in a way that is truly unforgivable.

I cannot begin to tell you how many times I have wished that I could go back and change what happened. But, to my great sorrow, I can’t. I can’t fix it. I can’t change it. I can’t undo it.

But I want to ask you just one last time to forgive me. I beg you to forgive me for betraying you. I sinned against you in one of the worst ways possible and I have regretted it every single day since. But I love you, Evie. I always have and I always will. It would be my greatest desire to be sisters again.

Love,
Your sister, Eliza

      I sucked in my breath as the tears rolled down my face. One of them dropped on the letter, smearing the E in my name. Should I write it again? I sighed and realized that I didn’t have the emotional energy to write it again. I shrugged my shoulders and folded up the letter. I stuck it in an envelope and then popped it into my purse. I needed to get her current address from Mom.
      I didn’t even have my sister’s address. Oh, what a sad and sorry state of affairs. But with God’s help, perhaps we could start rebuilding this family. And maybe it would start with my letter.

 

 

Don’t Be Just Another Fan

7 Comments / December 6, 2018

If you are on Facebook, you may have noticed that I have been sharing the posts of others less and less on the Growing4Life Facebook page. Why is this? Do I think I am the only one who is right? By all means NO. I don’t think this at all. And I am truly grateful for those who have the courage to stand up for the truth. I am just so hesitant to promote others because, in this strange new world, I never know where someone will end up and I don’t want to be responsible for promoting someone that leads another astray.

I have been thinking more of this because of what I have observed in the recent days: We not only have false teachers who gain huge followings of undiscerning people, we also have teachers who are teaching the truth in the wrong way who have gained huge followings. They are snide, prideful, and rude. They are careless and make jokes about things they shouldn’t. They are not sober-minded nor are they handling the Word with the care and awe with which it deserves. They write about certain false teachers, but leave others free to do their own thing. If a teacher is backed by a favored denomination or favored for some other reason, blatant evidence is ignored and we hear…nothing.

Does that mean we shouldn’t read and learn from them? No, of course not. But I want to remind you of how careful we must be when we follow anyone. We should never be an undiscerning fan and simply imbibe what someone says (and, yes, this applies to Growing4Life and what I write here, as well). I can’t stress how important this is. We must take responsibility for our own beliefs about God, His Word, and what is going on in the world around us.

Of course, most of us don’t want to do this because this means work. And we don’t have the time or the will or the desire to do the work necessary. We are tired, busy, or lazy.

Hopefully there are a few of you out there who care enough to do the work to study. And it is for those few that I offer the following tips to get started in discerning on your own rather than simply ingesting anything a favorite author or blogger has to say.

1. Read, study, and memorize your Bible. I know I say this all the time but that is because it is the most crucial component to being a godly Christian with proper discernment in this alarming church culture.

2. Do not assume that just because something or someone is labeled “Christian” they actually are. It is almost unbelievable how much self-worship has been cloaked as “Christian”. This should be the first test: What does this person teach about self? Are they promoting the way of the cross or the way of self-realization and self-glory?

3. Don’t follow a favored author or blogger without discernment. Pay attention to what they are posting. This doesn’t mean you stop following them at every small disagreement. We will never agree fully with everyone. But we must not only watch for accuracy in their posts, but also for attitudes and character. The key is that we don’t want to ever let down our guard as we choose authors, teachers, and bloggers to follow–even those who specialize in “discernment”.

4. Don’t let charisma trick you into believing someone. I could write a whole post on this and maybe someday I will. If you put two teachers side by side and the first is teaching truth in a rather dry and matter-of-fact way and the second is taking one Bible verse and then expounding on it falsely but with charisma and excitement, most Christians will choose the second. Certain people have what is appropriately called magnetism and we are drawn to them. It explains why so many false teachers have been wildly successful. It is critical that we don’t let this be our determination of who we follow. Charisma is utterly and completely irrelevant to truth.

5. Read and study the works of old preachers and pastors who wrote before the chaos that is the church today. We tend to be people who are obsessed with the “latest and greatest”. And we have probably been trained that way by Apple and Microsoft over these past twenty years. But I have found that, when it comes to spiritual material, the latest is rarely the greatest. Some of the best works were written over a hundred years ago and they are free from the politically correct garbage and the self-worshiping and self-exalting filth that clutters almost every modern-day offering. I recommend you start with J.C. Ryle and Charles Spurgeon. They are both not only generally solid, but they are easy to read, easily found online for free, and their books are often only .99 on Kindle.

6. Determine to only be loyal to God’s Word. While some people are fickle and easily move on to the next church, teacher, or author, many of us are super loyal. We find someone we trust and we never think about it again. I am so incredibly saddened to say that the days for this are over. I have seen many trusted pastors, authors, and bloggers start to go a wrong direction. It is subtle and almost imperceptible at first. While I don’t want to encourage an attitude of mistrust or constant skepticism, I do recommend a healthy dose of discernment for anyone we choose to follow. Only the Bible deserves our loyalty in full.

7. Pray. Ask the Lord to help you in this treacherous time. Ask for courage and strength and abundant wisdom. I have never seen such a time where truth is mixed with error in such a subtle way. I have never seen a time where Satan’s lies of self-exaltation, self-gratification, and self-glory have been so subtly cloaked and taught as “Christianity”. I have never seen a time when those who call themselves Christians are swallowing the lies and being deceived by the thousands. And I have never seen a time when those who would teach biblical truth would be so ostracized, persecuted, and outcast.

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You know, I understand why people want to just ignore all of this and remain in ignorance. Some days I wish for that, too. But as believers who have the opportunity and responsibility to impact our children, grandchildren, fellow believers, co-workers, and all others around us, for the cause of Christ we cannot afford to make the choice to put our heads in the sand.

Yes, it can be unpleasant and distressing. But we must be sure we are following and teaching a biblical faith in order to make a difference for Christ. We must keep our eyes and hearts focused on God and His Word. For only from this source will we receive the pure and unadulterated truth. Don’t blindly follow any human. Don’t be just another fan.

 

Mending Fences (Part 2)

Leave a Comment / November 30, 2018

This is Part 2 in this year’s Christmas Story. Sometimes life throws curve balls at us. And sometimes those curve balls are caused by our own choices. Are we resigned to live with the consequences of our sins? Well, to a certain extent the answer may be yes. But we serve a great God who can heal even the most broken of relationships. This is the theme of this year’s story. (Find Part 1 here)

      As I sat on the sofa, my mind went back to that first time I saw Rick. Evie’s best friend, Monica, had introduced her to Rick at a football game and it didn’t take them long to become inseparable. After just a few weeks she asked if she could bring him around for dinner. Mom had prepared her delicious roast beef and made-from-scratch mashed potatoes in Rick’s honor. For dessert, she had made a chocolate cake with a thick coating of peanut butter icing. Isn’t it funny what you remember about certain moments?
      Evie was 23 and had just settled into a good accounting job upon her graduation from the local university the preceding May. And she was ready to get married. It didn’t take her more than a few weeks of dating to believe that Rick was her future husband.
      I was 21 and working at Dad’s store while I tried to figure out what I wanted to do with my life. Dad and I got along well and it seemed like the perfect fit for the time being.
      Our whole family loved Rick from the very beginning. He was laid back and funny and had twinkling blue eyes that lit up when he talked to you. By the end of the evening, my dad had offered him a job at the store and I…well…I had fallen hopelessly in love.
      For the next year, I put on a pretty good act. No one knew I was head over heels in love with my sister’s handsome boyfriend. Well, Mom might have figured it out but if she did she didn’t say anything.
      But working together at the store had given us a special, albeit platonic, relationship. We had a lot of fun together. He teased me and I teased back. I think he enjoyed my lightheartedness and love for fun in comparison to my very serious-minded sister.
      One day, my sister came home with a ring on her finger. How it is possible to be so happy and so heartbroken at the same time is truly a mystery, but as both emotions washed over me, I told myself that I must move on. Rick was Evie’s. He would never be mine. I must resign myself to that.
      My mom caught my eye as I hugged Evie tightly and wished her the best. It was then that I realized that Mom most certainly did realize how I felt about Rick. I gave her a wry smile and went to my room.
A little later she came to talk to me. She told me she knew this was hard for me, but that I must be more careful with Rick now that he was engaged. She realized he treated me like a little sister, but I must be careful not to show my true feelings. For Evie’s sake and for Rick’s.
      I told Mom I understood and she left. And I really did understand. Of course, I didn’t plan for anything to happen between Rick and me. What loving sister ever would? I knew what was right. But, of course, one rarely does plan for these types of things.
      One night, a few weeks after my conversation with Mom I found myself in an undesirable situation. Christmas was always a busy time but this particular year it was extra busy because Dad was opening a second store in a nearby town. This demanded a lot of Dad’s time and so I was left to run the store many times on my own. Thankfully, it was always with one of the local high school kids that helped us out, as Dad had Rick at the new store more often than not. I found this a huge relief and honestly believed that my feelings were waning and I was ready to move on with life. But then, just a week before Christmas, came that one unexpected and dreaded night. Dad, completely unaware of my feelings, left Rick and me alone at the store.
      As we were closing for the night, we ended up in the back store room together. I had tried so hard to avoid this moment, always being so careful to not be alone with my sister’s fiancé. But when the moment finally presented itself, I caved. I am ashamed to admit it, but all of those feelings hid deep inside rushed to the surface and I caved.
      I am pretty sure Rick didn’t mean for it to happen, either. Although I have always wondered about that. I guess I’ll never know.
      My face grew hot as I remembered the rest of that night. What had I been thinking? My parents were very moral people. We didn’t go to church but I was raised right. I definitely knew the difference between right and wrong and that this was so wrong. How in the world could I have sacrificed the friendship of my sister and destroyed my family for a few stolen moments? I realized the sheer stupidity and blatant immorality of it all immediately afterwards.
      But it was too late. Within a year, life had utterly and completely changed forever: Evie had sworn she would never forgive me and moved away to California. Rick disappeared from the scene altogether and none of us ever saw him again. And I was a single mom to a baby girl who looked an awful lot like Rick. I named her Greta.
      
      

There’s More to Christianity Than Doing Good Works

6 Comments / November 29, 2018

“The reason Social Justice is attractive to the church is because it doesn’t invite criticism.” My brother (Pastor Dean) said these words as we talked on the phone yesterday. I immediately realized just how profound his words were.

Perhaps they are words each and every one of us should reflect upon.

There are many good things the church does that all people love. It matters not if they are Christian or not Christian. Nothing matters as we work hard with our fellow man to make the world a better place. This includes things like–

Feeding the hungry ♥ Adopting orphans ♥ Caring for the homeless ♥ Providing fresh water for third world villages ♥ Providing food, clothing, and shelter to needy families ♥ Giving money to charities

Who in their right mind is going to oppose such things?

And, just to be clear, I am not opposed to these things. And neither should any of us be. The Bible is clear: We are told to care for orphans (James 1:27); we are to help our fellow man– and particularly our Christians brothers and sisters– who are in need (Ephesians 4:28; Hebrews 6:10). These are good things to do.

But these aren’t the only things Christians are to be doing. Doing good for others is just a part of what it means to live a godly, righteous life.

There’s so much more. But the “more” doesn’t often draw the praise of man.

As soon as we go out into the world and preach the Gospel–the clear, unadulterated Gospel as the scripture teaches it–we immediately invite the antagonism, the scorn, and the hatred of the world.

And as soon as we try to teach and live out the Christian life that is clearly mandated in scripture among the murky and muddy waters that is the mainstream church we invite the antagonism, the scorn, and the hatred of that church.

When we bring a message the world doesn’t want to hear, such as you cannot be reconciled to God without believing in Jesus Christ (John 14:6), we will be criticized, mocked, and labeled. We may even be persecuted. By both the world and those claiming to belong to the church.

When we bring a message the mainstream church doesn’t want to hear, such as encouraging believers to practice discernment (Hebrews 5:14), be separate from the world (James 1:27), and strive for holiness (I Peter 1:15-16), criticism and animosity will often rain down upon our head from within the church doors.

This is why so many of us choose to do the Christian things that invite the praise and laud of people. And it’s also why we avoid doing the Christian things that invite criticism.

How much do you care what people think about you? Does this change what you stand for or stand against?

I have to be honest and let you know right up front that this has been–by far–my biggest battle in this ministry.

It is natural for people to want to be liked and I am no exception. I don’t want to be labeled divisive, negative, unloving, arrogant, and whatever other words I have been called.

And yet, over and over again, God continues to remind me that my job is to please Him, first and foremost. As believers, our priority is to do all to the glory and pleasure of our Lord, irrespective of the opinions of man.

The opinions of those around us are, in essence, irrelevant.

Now reflect on that truth for just a few seconds. Why do we do what we do? How do we feel if we do something good and it goes unnoticed? How do we respond when we are faced with a choice to speak out against something we know God hates or a false teacher that is leading someone we love astray? Do we have the courage to share the Gospel unapologetically with the lost all around us? Are we truly living like no one’s opinion matters but God’s?

Inside each of us, a battle rages between the flesh and our new man. And the flesh wants to be pleasing to our fellow man. It is just how we are. But when we are saved, we have a new purpose. We seek first God and His Kingdom (Matthew 6:33). We are new creatures (2 Corinthians 5:17). Everything is changed.

In theory, that is.

In real life, it doesn’t just happen. It is a daily struggle.

However, as new creatures, we must fight this fight. For if we let the flesh win, it is not without deadly consequences. Think of how many children in Christian homes have grown up and gone out to live ungodly lives in the world because parents didn’t want to be unpopular? Think of how many inroads Satan has made into the lives of believers because they want to be cool to their friends? How many have followed false teachers because their Christian friends are afraid to speak up? Think of the light that has gone out in the church because of the desire to win the praise of the world?

If we aren’t willing to be different than the world and if we are driven by a passion to please the world (or the compromised, mainstream church), we will be rendered ineffective for the cause of Christ.

Sure, we can do all sorts of nice things for others and make this temporal world a better place to live in, but if we aren’t sharing the Gospel and pointing people to biblical Christian living, what eternal good are we even accomplishing?

Are we more likely to do the things that draw the praise of man? Do we shy away from the righteous and good things that draw criticism?

Pastor Dean’s words really made me think. And, once again, I was reminded: My priority is to please God.

Am I living to please God or are my daily life choices based on pleasing those around me? It is an important question that we should probably all give some thought to.

 

A Challenge for 2019

5 Comments / November 25, 2018

I believe the Bible to be the inerrant and inspired and sufficient Word of God. I believe that it has the answers for all of life and that power for the Christian life is found there. And I believe that God’s precious Word is being attacked at an unprecedented level.

It is my hope that this blog will encourage my readers to honor and defend the Bible. I hope it encourages you to turn to scripture for guidance and direction and to use it as a grid to test all things.

One of the best ways to accomplish this is to encourage you, my readers, to read and study the scriptures personally. After all, it is imperative that we don’t rely on fallible men and women for our Christian growth. We should be actively reading and studying the Word for ourselves.

It is with this in mind that I once again am offering a Growing4Life Bible Reading Challenge for the new year. I am presenting this about a month early to give you the opportunities to purchase books and to get any materials together in preparation before 2019 gets here.

The 2019 Challenge will be a chronological read-through of God’s Word from Genesis to Revelation. I am excited about this challenge. We did a similar challenge in 2015 and I can’t recommend it highly enough. Reading the entire Bible in a year is life-changing. You can find all of the details here at this page–

2019 Bible Reading Challenge

I truly hope that you will consider joining me in this new challenge. I want to be here to encourage and support you in this and you will find several ways I try to do this at the link above.

“But,” you may be thinking, “I always fail. I never make it through the whole year. Why bother?”

I, like you, said that same thing for many years. And I have two things to say in response to this:

First, yes, you might be right. You might not make it. But you will still have read God’s Word for one month or three or six. It’s not time wasted, no matter how far you get.

And, second, one of these times you will make it through. Don’t give up! It took me fifty years, but one year I actually succeeded in making it the whole way through. I know you can make it, too. Especially with a little help and support.

So why not give it a try? Join the Growing4Life Bible Challenge and commit to reading God’s Word in 2019!

Mending Fences (Part 1)

5 Comments / November 23, 2018

During the holiday season, I like to step away from my normal type of post once each week and share one part of a 5-part Christmas Story that I have written. It stretches my brain to write in this different way and hopefully provides you with not only a little escape from the busyness of the season but also challenges you in your own walk with the Lord as you reflect on the story. And, so, with that brief introduction, I present to you this year’s story, which is called Mending Fences—

      I don’t know when it happened but I couldn’t remember what she looked like. Not that it mattered. She probably had changed, anyway. And it wasn’t like I was going to see her anytime soon. But it still filled me with sorrow that I couldn’t remember her face.
      I sat on my front porch, deep in reflection. The smell of autumn was in the air and a cool wind had forced me to don a light sweater. This time of year always made me nostalgic. It brought memories of school days, football games, and the much-anticipated preparation for the holiday season at Dad’s store.
      My thoughts turned back to my sister. I squinted my eyes as I tried to recollect her features. I remembered that she had straight brown hair. And greenish eyes hidden by rather thick glasses. But the rest just disappeared into the vague recesses of my memory.
      How could I have forgotten what my sister looks like? The thought startled and scared me at the same time. A part of my past was escaping my memory and it deeply saddened me.
      I went back into the house and climbed the stairs to the attic. I turned on the light and started making my way through the collection of boxes kept there. There was a photo album from my past somewhere in all of those relics. I finally spotted the gray container that held all my old albums. I found the frayed, green photo album I was looking for as soon as I opened the container.
      I sat down on a box and started paging through it. Ahh, there she was. My beautiful, green-eyed sister with the tortoise shell glasses and thick brown hair that fell just a little below her shoulders. The perfect nose and high cheek bones gave her a special type of beauty that I had not inherited.
      I wondered if she still wore her hair like this? Did she still wear glasses or did she have contacts now? It had been fifteen years since we had laid eyes on each other. Could it have really been that long?
      It was with great regret that I remembered that we hadn’t even talked to each other that last time. The awkwardness of Daddy’s funeral came back in a rush. The great efforts we both made to try and avoid one another. The rapid heartbeat and eyes on the ground if she got too near. The lack of desire to even speak to her. Her lack of interest in Greta, her only niece. I could remember it all like it was yesterday.
      But one does a lot of growing up in fifteen years. And now I found myself wishing I had done a lot of things differently. If onlys plagued me.
      If I had to do over, I would change things. I really would. But I recognized the futility of that thought.
      “Mom?” Greta stirred me out of my reverie.
      “Up here, honey! I’ll be right down!”
      Sighing, I placed the photo album back into the box and placed the lid on top. A few hours later, our Friday pizza and movie night was over and Greta was sleeping soundly in her room. As I sat on the sofa in the family room, my mind went back to the past.
      Life has a way of stealing our happy endings. And so it was with me. But maybe I had short-changed myself. I was simply reaping what I had sown. Perhaps I should start at the beginning. That would help all of this make more sense to you.

      Once upon a time (don’t all stories begin this way?) there were two sisters. Evie, the firstborn, was shy and quiet. Her younger sister, Eliza, was boisterous and outgoing. But the two were inseparable from the very beginning.

      Doesn’t that sound nice? Just like a lovely story you might read in an actual book.

      Except that the lovely story ended up not so lovely. I’m Eliza. The younger sister by only 15 months. And Evie and I were best friends. Together we navigated playgrounds, middle school, and teen-aged angst. Together we weathered broken friendships, boyfriend break-ups, and frustrations with Mom and Dad.
      Memories started flooding my mind as I recalled those days. Like the time when Marcy, my best school friend of several years, just decided one day that she liked Lauren better than she liked me. From that time on, I watched the two girls eat lunch side-by-side, climb the monkey bars at recess, and sit beside each other at every opportunity—all while I sat alone and uninvited to their circle. Oh, how I had cried. It was Evie who comforted me. Evie who wrapped her small arms around me so tightly and said, “now, don’t you worry! We love you and family is what matters.”
      I felt my eyes start to burn. Oh, the turns that life takes. I wondered what would have happened if Rick had never set foot in dad’s store? How would our lives have been different?
 
 

Don’t Let Anyone Steal Your Peace This Holiday Season

6 Comments / November 19, 2018

Good morning! It is the Monday before Thanksgiving. As I thought about this holiday, I wondered how I could encourage a thankful heart in a new and different way that improves upon all that is out there. I decided I can’t so I am going to go a little different direction. But first, I wanted to take a few moments today to let you know of a few upcoming things here at Growing4Life–

First, the Growing4Life 2018 Christmas story is coming! Starting this Friday, I will share one part for the next five Fridays. The final part and ending will be posted on Friday, December 21. This year’s story is called Mending Fences and is about two sisters and how forgiveness changes everything. I hope you all enjoy reading it as much as I have enjoyed writing it.

Second, I have decided on the Growing4Life 2019 Bible Reading Challenge. (Can you believe it’s going to be 2019?? Where does the time go?) For next year’s challenge, we will be doing a chronological Bible read through. I did this 4 years ago for my 2015 Challenge. I have decided to do it again, because I think it it vital for every Christian to read through the Bible at least once. Reading through the Bible gives fundamental understanding and insight into God’s plan and story that one just cannot get in any other way.

Providing the G4L Challenge and an accompanying Facebook group where we can share and discuss what we are reading is my way to help and support my readers in this endeavor for anyone who desires to do this. I hope to get the details out for the new challenge within the next week or two. I do hope that many of you will join me!

I honestly don’t really know how many of you out there actually even read my posts (especially you, my subscribers, as emails just land in boxes and probably mostly go unread) but it continues to be my hope to be an encouragement for believers to walk with God in submission and obedience and to be a light that points people to the Word of God as their authority and guide in a culture that’s growing increasingly darker. I hope that both this year’s Christmas story and the 2019 Bible Reading Challenge will do just this.

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Now, for a few thoughts that may be a little different this Thanksgiving. Holidays can be a bit rough on many of us. Unsaved or deceived family members and friends can challenge or discourage us at gatherings. They can keep us from enjoying ourselves and we let them mess with our peace.

I was struggling with something the other day. Someone had responded unkindly to me and my dad shared with me something my Grandpa used to say. It was something like this–

Don’t let someone else and their problems steal your peace.

Have you ever thought how often we have done this? At least, I have. Someone is mean or angry with me and that affects my mood. Next thing you know I am short with my husband or someone else close to me.

It reminds me of a time a lady called us on Christmas Day because we hadn’t plowed her driveway yet. She was a widow with nowhere to go and she was angry because we hadn’t been there yet. As my heart grew defensive within me and I wanted to start yelling at her, I remembered something: Her husband had just died. She was lonely and hurting and this was her response. So many people get angry in response to deep hurts.

We need to remember that–

People always do what they do for a reason.

As believers, let’s show extra grace. They may be hurting. Or they may be caught up and deceived by a wrong philosophy. Whatever it may be, our response, as believers, is to have lots of grace and mercy, just as God has for us. Let us love even the unlovable because God loves us. For remember, God loved us when we were yet sinners (Romans 5:8).

Another thing to consider is this: If you have your mind set in a certain direction, what will be most likely to change it? Harsh, angry, words of debate and argument or kind, thoughtful words that encourage respectful discussion?

We live in a world that is increasingly divided. Whether it’s politics, personal rights, or false teachers, there are a million opinions out there. But the only opinion that matters is God’s. What does the Bible say? But, even as we try to share what scripture says, may we be respectful, kind, and loving. As God gives us opportunities, let us not grow angry or insistent. Only God can change a heart. That is not our responsibility.

So as we meet together with friends and family that may have differing opinions, let’s love them. Let us have unending grace. And let’s point them to scripture if and when the “hot” topics come up. Let us not allow anyone to make us frustrated or angry. Or to steal our peace. Let’s not give them that power. I do know that this feels almost impossible but the truth is that it is our choice.

And then, at the end of the day, when we have made the right choice, we can walk away in peace, knowing we have done the right thing, no matter what their response.

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I wish you all a wonderful Thanksgiving! I am so thankful for all of you, but particularly those of you that have taken your precious time to share that you appreciate what I do here at Growing4Life. Blogging about discernment and living a holy life in these difficult days is a rather lonely and discouraging thing and those of you that have encouraged me have been used by God to keep me going. God’s timing on your notes, emails, and Facebook messages has been incredible and I always marvel at this. So thank you. Thank you for reading. Thank you for encouraging. And thank you for being part of the Growing4Life family of believers. Let us continue to stir one another up to love and good deeds as we march forth as soldiers of the Cross!

 

 

 

My Way or His Way?

4 Comments / November 15, 2018

In 1969 a song was written by Paul Anka that was made popular by a crooner named Frank Sinatra. The song has a thoughtful and appealing tune and is called “My Way”.  The final stanza of the song does a good job of summing up the song–

For what is a man, what has he got?
If not himself, then he has naught
To say the things he truly feels and not the words of one who kneels
The record shows I took the blows and did it my way
Yes, it was my way

It’s pretty clear that this song is an anti-Christian song since the entire song is like a theme for humanism. The author did things his way and didn’t answer to any supreme being or any human being. Of course, the author will answer to God one day, if he hasn’t already. So why am I talking about a 50 year old song?

I’ll tell you why.

Because I have seen more and more people who claim to be Christians live by this mantra:

I did it my way.

I’ll do it my way.

And then, eventually, in our obsession with our dreams, our purposes, and our goals, we end up believing that…

God exists to help me do it my way.

We are concerned only about our way.

The thing is…

Biblical Christianity teaches the opposite–

• Instead of being obsessed with our own plans and dreams, we are to submit to God’s plans. (Rom 14:8)

• Instead of being driven by our selfish desires, we are to deny ourselves. (Luke 9:23)

• Instead of thinking only of ourselves and our purpose and desires, we are to think of others. (Phil 2:3)

It’s easy to point a finger at others and shake our heads in sadness or disgust. See how selfishly they are living? Isn’t that a shame? But, while we may not ascribe to self-centered living in theory, how often do we live it without realizing it?

I am amazed, even though I have been walking with the Lord all these years, at how often I am driven by my own selfish desires and will. And disgusted at how often I find myself obsessing about myself and my happenings. Can you relate? Or am I alone on this one?

I think one of the greatest challenges of walking with the Lord is this:

Living for Him instead of for me.

And, in this current church culture, we aren’t even given this challenge, are we? We are told that we can live for ourselves and expect God to swoop in and be our personal genie to help us fulfill our big dreams and realize our insanely important purposes.

But God cares far more about our holiness than our happiness. (Romans 5:3-5)

And it’s not about us. Our lives are just a teeny-tiny point on the map of the universe and the timeline of history; both of which are utterly and absolutely under the sovereignty of God. (Isaiah 46:10)

God is choosing to use us for His glory and His purposes at this time. His glory. His purposes. (Ephesians 2:10)

I guess Paul sums it up best for all of us in Galatians 2:20–

I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself for me.

This, as true believers, is our aspiration. We are to die to self and live for God. It is a message that isn’t heard very much anymore. You won’t hear it from most pulpits or read it in the Christian best-sellers. In a culture obsessed with only positive messages, this is a message that isn’t very popular.

Everyone wants to live life their way and they want a God who will bless them as they do things their way. And even those of us who truly desire to live for Christ can be swayed a bit by this wrong thinking about God.

And so I hope that today you will take some time to reflect on how you are living for yourself instead of for God. And while you do that, I’ll be doing the same. Just because I can write things like this, doesn’t mean I don’t struggle with the same things you do. It’s one thing to write. It’s another thing to live.

So let’s strive to live for God together, always turning to His Word for guidance and direction. And, in a world full of people obsessed with doing things “my way”,  let’s do things His way.

 

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