Christianity – Page 36 – Growing 4 Life

Why How We Live Is So Important

7 Comments / February 19, 2015 February 19, 2015

Many times, as believers, we really struggle with this concept of holiness. If we are truly saved, it is something we know is required of us and so we work and strive to be more “holy”. But do we truly understand why?

I think that is a question with several answers, but one was just made very clear to me by our scripture reading this past week.

As you read the detailed description of the tabernacle, did your eyes glaze over? I have to confess that as I read all of the specifics about the Tabernacle, I found it hard to stay focused on what I was reading. In this day and age of “soundbite” information, such detail can be hard for us to read.

So why did God place so many details about the Tabernacle in His Word? That was the question my youngest daughter and I found ourselves discussing the other day.

If God gave 50+ chapters in the Old Testament to let us know His exact requirements for the place His Spirit would reside with the children of Israel in the wilderness, then it must be important. As we discussed this question, it dawned on me that it could have something to do with helping us to understand just how holy is the place His Spirit demands as a sanctuary. It gives us some insight into just how holy and awesome God is!

Now, jump with me, if you will, to the New Testament. Suddenly, personal holiness takes on a whole new meaning–

Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? (I Corinthians 6:19)

That good thing which was committed to you, keep by the Holy Spirit who dwells in us. (2 Timothy 1:14)

For there are three that bear witness in heaven: the Father, the Word, and the Holy Spirit; and these three are one.(I John 4:7)

If, now, in this church age, we have become the place in which the Holy Spirit dwells, then our sin takes on a whole new light, doesn’t it? It becomes even more offensive and not something to brush off lightly, as we are so apt to do.

I would often ask my kids if they would take Jesus to that movie or listen to that radio station if Jesus were sitting in the car with them as they were growing up. But God is with them at all times. God, the Holy Spirit, is with them. With me. With you. At all times. We have a responsibility to live a holy and pure life so that we are a fitting place for the Holy Spirit to dwell.

If God gave all of that detail in the Old Testament showing us what He required (and it’s clear that the sacrifice of Jesus did eliminate all of the ritual and blood sacrifices of old — just read Hebrews 9) and if we read all of the specifics of gold and silver and bronze, of the colors of blue and purple and scarlet, the carvings of orange and almond blossoms, we have to understand that God demands the best.

Not perfection. Perfection isn’t an option in this sinful world. But the best, purest, most holy me I can be. Because if I believe what the Bible says then I understand that when I became a believer, His Spirit came to dwell within me.

Doesn’t that make us view even the smallest choices with much greater care? And even our “smallest” sins with much greater remorse? Doesn’t daily confession and the idea of repentance make much more sense with this insight? We not only represent a Holy God, but His Spirit dwells within us!

In this day and age of casual living, we tend to view God as our buddy and friend (and we are called His friends in John 15:14) but may we learn from our Old Testament reading that God is also holy and awesome and omnipotent. This hasn’t changed just because of Jesus’s sacrifice on the cross. And a Holy God demands a holy dwelling place. Let us not forget!

Please Note: I am presenting the insight and understanding that I am learning as we read through the Bible with each Thursday post, but may I encourage you to please do your own study using good resources to gain insight and grow in the Lord. I am doing my best to give biblical, solid food for thought as we read through the Bible, but I would be the first to admit that I am no theologian!

Grace and Introspection

8 Comments / February 12, 2015 February 12, 2015

Sometimes we approach the stories we read in the Bible with a bit of arrogance, don’t we?

“Well, I would have never done that!”

“I can’t believe anyone could have acted {or reacted} like that!”

If you are reading along in the Bible Challenge, we have arrived in one of the most exciting books of the Bible–

Exodus.

In this book we witness God’s power through many different miracles, we see His care and protection for His people, and we read of God’s faithfulness and sinful man’s faithlessness.

It’s the faithless stories that drive me a little crazy. One of these is told in Exodus 14:10-12. Here’s what it says–

And when Pharaoh drew near, the children of Israel lifted their eyes, and behold, the Egyptians marched after them. So they were very afraid, and the children of Israel cried out to the Lord. ¹¹Then they said to Moses, “Because there were no graves in Egypt, have you taken us away to die in the wilderness? Why have you so dealt with us, to bring us up out of Egypt? ¹²Is this not the word that we told you in Egypt, saying, ‘Let us alone that we may serve the Egyptians’? For it would have been better for us to serve the Egyptians than that we should die in the wilderness.”

My initial reaction when reading this was to condemn the Israelites harshly. For goodness’ sake, they had just lived through the ten plagues where they had witnessed miracle after miracle. They had seen the lives of their firstborn children and livestock spared, while the firstborn sons and livestock of the Egyptians were killed on one dark, dark night. There was only one explanation for how they could even be beside the Red Sea at that very moment and that explanation was God. God had worked miraculously to bring them to this point. They had seen it with their very own eyes!

And yet they doubted.

How could that be?

But then I remember times in my life when I do the same thing. Oh, it may not be in such dramatic fashion. I’ve never had the waters part for me or food fall down from heaven, but I’ve seen the hand of God work in mighty and wondrous ways– ways that defy circumstances and could never be called coincidental. And then, after all that, the impossible scenario comes along and I throw up my hands with questions and doubts, all the while wondering if God really does care for me.

One thing I have learned over the years is that when we are in our lowest, most hopeless place is when we see God work in the most incredible ways.

If we can do it ourselves and fix it ourselves and, through our own effort, solve our own problems then we have no need for God.

But when we reach that hopeless place–when we are smack dab against the Sea with nowhere to run and the enemy is headed towards us at breakneck speed-that’s when God shows His power!

Sure, we can criticize the Israelites’ reaction as they sat in that terribly hopeless place, but I am pretty sure we would have done the same thing. After all, we do do the same thing.

As we read through the Bible and even as we interact with other believers, let’s remember to do so with humility, love, and much grace. We don’t know how we would act in any circumstance, but one thing we can be sure of is that we are sinners, just like everyone else. And that fact alone should keep us humble and full of grace. And let’s keep our eyes open, because our God is still working in our most hopeless situations!

A Picture of Repentance

2 Comments / February 2, 2015 October 29, 2016

So let’s say you and I live in Indiana. You are without a car and license but have an urgent need to get to California. I am your best friend and am out of a job right now, so you ask me to drive you there.

Okay, so that probably wouldn’t happen, but stick with me, would you?

We get in my car and start off on our adventure. You aren’t paying attention to the road signs as we talk with one another. An hour or two later you grow drowsy and fall asleep. When you wake up a few hours later, you see a big sign that says “Welcome to Pennsylvania”.

What?? You are quickly wide awake. You ask me what in the world are you doing? with some panic in your voice. I look at the sign and then look at you. I calmly acknowledge that I am definitely not going in the right direction.

What do you want me to do at this point? How would I acknowledge that I am serious about the grave error that I have committed against you?

Would I simply stop the car and tell you how very sorry I was? Or perhaps go buy you a nice dinner?

Obviously, I would turn around and start going the right direction.

So, here’s the thing– why exactly aren’t we taught that this is the natural response of someone who truly believes in God for His free gift of salvation through Jesus Christ? We have committed a grave sin against God and yet many of us say we’re sorry but then keep living the same life we have always lived, never changing direction and continually abusing the grace of a loving, holy God. Could that possibly mean that we haven’t repented at all? It is something very serious to ponder.

So why don’t we view a decision to follow Christ with this in mind?

Probably because Satan has weaved a fantastic lie that is extremely appealing to all of us in our human form– we can be saved (and skip hell) by just saying a quick prayer, letting Jesus know we believe that He died for us. But that’s just not true.

Yes, I said it. It’s not true. Nowhere in scripture is there indication that this is true. True salvation is always followed by some form of fruit. You cannot read the Bible without understanding this very important fact. (Matthew 7:16; I John 2:3-6; Galatians 5:19-26)

Remember my favorite saying?? It’s about direction; not perfection. When we are saved, we turn around and start heading a different direction– one that goes against the crowd. Oh, sometimes we mess up and get turned around briefly, but, generally, we are going towards God and away from the world. The very nature of salvation demands this change in direction. It’s not something you can choose or have to choose. It just is, according to God’s Word.

Now, lest you think I am teaching a works-based salvation, I certainly am not. There is nothing you or I could do to merit salvation. Ever. We have broken God’s laws– no matter how little we have sinned and that sin demands justice. Jesus died to pay the price for our sin. When we get that– I mean really get that— then repentance isn’t a “have to” but a “want to”. The change in direction is as natural as breathing. It’s just what you do if you are a true disciple.

Don’t let the lie of easy believism steal your soul or the souls of those you love. If someone claims to know Christ but has never shown any fruit whatsoever, talk to them. Don’t tell them they are going to hell– since you are not the judge and that method won’t be effective, anyway. But it’s ok to share your concerns. In fact, if a bus were heading towards your loved one, wouldn’t you shout a warning? I would say the same holds true if we are fearing eternal damnation for them.

Look, I know we are worried about what people think. I struggle with that, too. We don’t want to be “over the top” and we don’t want to annoy anyone. We don’t want to be called the “Jesus freak” or ruin our reputation at work or in the family. But I have to wonder– wouldn’t that mean that we are more concerned about ourselves than we are about the person who is in danger of eternal hell fire?

It is certainly something to think about, isn’t it?

Thighs are jiggly in the real world

2 Comments / January 19, 2015 January 19, 2015

I saw a video on Facebook the other day that showed real women exercising. Their bodies weren’t perfect, their thighs jiggled, most had a little tummy, and they broke a real sweat. They looked like they were having a great time. It was a commercial put out by a foreign athletic company for the same reason that the Dove soap commercial came out a few years ago with Jamie Lee Curtis–to present the truth about women. And it was beautiful.

Sometimes I get so weary of trying to be perfect, don’t you? We are constantly barraged by photos on our computers, tablets, and smartphones that tell us we do not measure up. We’re not skinny enough, our houses aren’t beautiful enough, our kids aren’t perfect enough. There is always this elusive, impossible standard that hangs over our heads.

That standard didn’t really exist even 25 years ago. It was just starting to affect us. Now it can control us if we aren’t careful. A big problem in our pinterest-facebook-instagram world is the standards and expectations we set for ourselves because of the pictures we see.

It reminds me of a blog I landed on a few weeks ago. It was a young mom’s home and she had taken some holiday pictures of it that were gorgeous! She obviously has an eye for decorating and design. But even as I scrolled down through, I felt inadequate.

Now, don’t get me wrong– I don’t think there is anything necessarily wrong with posting beautiful pictures. Our world is a much more creative place now that the online world is filled with blogs and Pinterest. But, oh, how careful we need to be as we surf the online world.

Life is so much more than the pictures you see on social media. It’s full of jiggles and cellulite. It’s full of dirt and messes. It’s okay if our houses don’t look like they belong on a blog post. It’s okay if we have a little tummy pooch. Who in the world ever gave us the impression that’s it’s not? And why do we listen to them?

This post is not about losing weight or enjoying interior design but, instead, about trying to be someone we are not because of pictures we see. It’s about young, healthy moms who think they are overweight because they don’t look like the single girl they graduated with ten years ago. It’s about being discontent with our body shapes and our possessions. It’s a vicious cycle, isn’t it?

And if we get into that cycle of discontentment, all gratitude is gone. And without gratitude, we lose sight of our many blessings — a critical part of a healthy relationship with God.

We need to be careful of the subtle call of discontentment and view it for what it is and then take necessary steps to change it. Because life is just too short to try to be something we aren’t. Let’s instead live lives of joy and gratitude and turn to God’s Word for our standards of living. Because, in the end, the fruits of the spirit and a godly life will be so much more important than any external change we may have made.

I Timothy 4:8 For bodily exercise profits a little, but godliness is profitable for all things, having promise of the life that now is and of that which is to come.

Why Waiting Is Sometimes the Best Option

3 Comments / January 15, 2015 January 15, 2015

I think I may have done the same thing. It’s hard to know, isn’t it? But if my husband would have been promised heirs as numerous as the dust and I very obviously couldn’t have children, I may have tried to fix it, too. Because that’s what we humans do. We try to fix uncomfortable, inconvenient, unpleasant situations.

Only sometimes –many times– it backfires.

I couldn’t help but think of this as I read Genesis 16. If you are doing the Bible Challenge this year, you will have recently read (or will soon read) about Sarai giving her maid, Hagar, to Abram to bear children for her. In a culture like theirs we can’t conceive of giving our husband another woman, but that was a different time and place and Sarai was obviously desperate for a baby. So instead of waiting, she took matters into her own hands. As we read on, we see that her decision to do that not only caused heartache for her and her family, but caused strife and anguish for generations to come. She took matters into her own hands and many, many people suffered –and continue to suffer–because of it. For Ishmael is considered to be the ancestor of the Arab nation and this seems to be the birthplace of the historical strife between them and the Jews.

It is easy for me to sit back and point a finger at Sarai. How could she be so hasty and foolish to think she could fix a problem that only God could fix? And, yet, how often I am guilty of the same thing.

I have been known to rush in and try to “fix” my husband and my kids on many occasions. I have tried to fix situations at church and in my extended family. These efforts are usually not helpful and I have been slowly learning to back away and pray instead.

Of course, sometimes, God would lead us to confront someone (Matthew 1815-17) or to pull them from the fire (Jude 1:22-23) but this should only be done with much humility and after much prayer. There is a place for thinking outside of the box to solve problems and giving our energy to changing our own bad habits but human efforts should never be done impulsively or out of desperation. They should never take precedence over God’s will. And we should never, ever try to change someone else’s bad habits unless they ask for our help. Because I have learned that this is a completely fruitless and utterly hopeless task.

Of course, this is so easy to write about but much harder to put in place. For example–

The other day, I found myself growing extremely frustrated that once again my floor was filled with muddy footprints. I found myself in a bit of a panic, as Bible Study was going to be taking place in my home shortly and my family seemed to have no care about this, but continued to walk across my clean floor with their wet boots on. And so I took matters into my own hands and started yelling. Yeah, like that’s going to fix it. In my experience, yelling has never fixed anything. So why do I keep doing it?

Thankfully, this pathetic effort at trying to fix something in my life in the wrong way only humbled me and reminded me of my great sinfulness. I was absolutely mortified to be yelling at my family just before my friends walked in my house. And instead of fixing the situation, I had just made it worse.

Which is what usually happens when I try to fix something without praying and considering the ramifications beforehand.

And this was just a wrong response to a muddy floor– a tiny blip in the timeline of my life with no long-lasting consequences. I can’t imagine how Sarai must have felt after she tried to take matters in her own hands. A lifetime of strife would follow and she was to blame. Taking matters into our own hands can have minor consequences or they can have major ones, but there are always consequences.

And so perhaps we would be better off if we would wait quietly, taking time to consider and pray, bringing our baffling problems and unsolvable puzzles to the Lord instead of trying to impulsively fix them ourselves.

And the wonderful thing about doing this is that so many times, the Lord proves Himself so faithful in these situations! Even just recently, a friend shared how God worked in an absolutely astounding and surprising way to solve an impossible situation. For it’s only when we can’t solve it ourselves that we really see God work, just as He did in Sarai’s life by giving her baby Isaac. For, with God, nothing is impossible.

A Call to Prayer for Our Men

Leave a Comment / January 12, 2015 January 12, 2015

{my apologies that my subscribers are receiving this post twice. I actually had to restore my site and re-post this.}

My daughter and I met some friends for lunch on Friday. The hour and a half drive there took us through a section of road that has adult stores dotting the roadside for several miles. Usually these stores have cars in front of them that are very obviously parked so that no one can see their license plates. A sure sign of embarrassment and shame.

As we drove back home on Friday, I happened to see a man get out of his work truck in front of one of these stores. He went around the side of his truck to fix or rearrange something. I stared at him as we went by. I wanted to see just what kind of men frequent such places.

And guess what? He looked like an ordinary guy that we’d hire to fix our car or stand and talk to at a sports game. He certainly didn’t look like an evil monster.

Now, truthfully, I didn’t expect him to look like a monster. So what’s my point? I believe that we women have done a great disservice to our men if we are not praying for their sexual purity.

It makes us so uncomfortable to even talk about this. Even now, some of you will be appalled that I would be writing about such a thing. But, honestly– unless you are living in blind ignorance–you must realize that pornography has become a problem of epidemic proportions in the American family. Even in Christian families. So many face the consequences of this deadly, secret sin in one way or another.

I’m not going to speak to the men since I obviously can’t understand how that temptation works for them. However, I am going to challenge the women reading this– wives, mothers, aunts, grandmothers– to pray for the men in their lives regarding sexual purity. Pray for your husbands, sons, nephews, grandsons. Ask the Lord to protect them from this particular temptation.

We can’t just turn our heads and pretend this problem doesn’t exist. Because that doesn’t keep it from existing.

Will you join me in praying for the sexual purity of our husbands and sons? Our nephews and grandsons? Our brothers and brothers-in-law? And even our pastors and spiritual leaders? God will use our prayers to help them to resist the temptation of this secret sin that destroys so many marriages and families. We must never underestimate the power of prayer!

Obviously, this is not my typical kind of post. But when I saw that normal-looking man walk into that store, my heart broke for him and his family because I know that they have a serious problem that will only grow worse unless he seeks help. And it reminded me to pray hard for the men in my life in this particular area. I thought I would share this with you, in case you, too, would like to ask God to strengthen and protect the men in your life.

What Kind of Advertisement Are You?

Leave a Comment / January 5, 2015 January 5, 2015

Have you ever seen an unfit, overweight personal trainer? How much confidence would you have in them helping you reach your goals? I am reminded of a shop I was in that had a prominent display for some magic weight loss formula sitting on the counter. Staring up at me were photos of smiling, super-fit people and words that held incredible promises for a changed body. My eyes inevitably swung to the shop owner. It seemed to me that if this wonderful weight loss product worked miracles, this owner would be living proof. But that was not the case.

And I’d be lying if I didn’t say that it rather undermined my confidence in trying that particular product.

And I guess that is exactly how it is when we Christians try to tell people how wonderful Jesus is, all the while standing in a filthy mire of our own making. We don’t trust, we don’t forgive, we love the world, we worry, we use foul and crude language, we walk away from distasteful and unpleasant situations, we lie, we cheat, we quarrel, we envy, we betray, we complain incessantly, we have a bad work ethic, and our entertainment choices are just like everybody else’s. In other words, it would appear as if Jesus just doesn’t make a bit of a difference. Why would we expect someone to want what we have?

Of course, sometimes Christians fail. That is a fact of life. There are lovely, godly people who are divorced, who have spiritually lost their children, and who have had abortions. I am not talking about the past. And I am not talking about the flesh that continues to plague us even after salvation. We do slip in our language sometimes. We go to a movie and realize half-way through that this was definitely a wrong choice. We struggle through forgiving. But the key word is struggle— sincere believers are continually fighting their sin.

What I am talking about are the patterns of sin that are so ingrained in us, we aren’t even aware of them.

What kind of advertisement are we for our Savior? Seriously. Let’s stop for just a minute and think about our last 24 hours. If someone saw where we went, the words we spoke, the entertainment we set before our eyes and ears, and the food and drink we consumed, would they give evidence that we are a follower of Jesus Christ?

There is so much talk about “God looking on the heart”– and so he does–but that doesn’t excuse sinful actions, for out of a pure heart comes a holy life. We certainly do not need works to be saved but our works our evidence that we are saved. (See I John 2:3-6; 2 Peter 1:5-9; Matthew 7:16-20)

You can have righteous actions without a right heart, but you cannot have a right heart without righteous actions. It’s impossible.

I hope and pray that I am a good example of a believer. I mess up so often– especially at home. Many times I don’t even feel qualified to be writing. And yet God leads me on and continues to nudge me to keep writing.

I just know I don’t want anyone to wonder at my funeral whether or not I was a believer. I don’t want any “I think so’s” or “she said a prayer when she was little but…”

Instead, I want people to say with confidence that I was someone who followed hard after God. I am certainly far, far from perfection. Each day brings me deeper and fuller knowledge of just how far, but I want to be going the right direction, without question and without wavering.

I hope that you want the same to be said of you. Because it is only through this that we can make any difference at all. After all, what good are we if we look just like everyone else? If our decisions are made from our feelings and emotions, just like everyone else? If we don’t handle life’s tough situations differently, if we don’t bring integrity to the work place, or love and kindness to our relationships, then we are like that shop owner. We are advertising something that obviously isn’t working.

The Christmas Letter

Leave a Comment / December 19, 2014 December 19, 2014

Dear Friends and Family,

This year was great! Jack was valedictorian and is headed to the best university in the country with a full scholarship. Little Suzy was the top gymnast in her league and has hopes to reach the Olympics. We all went on a missions trip that was absolutely wonderful! At least a hundred people came to know the Lord while we were there. John received a promotion. Susan is the head of the PTA. Our dog is perfect, as is our home, our car, and everything about our family. See the lovely pictures and please envy our lives. Because we have it all together. And you don’t.

Love,

John and Susan

Okay, so I am being a little facetious, here. Obviously. But I think this challenge of sharing good news can sometimes come across like this letter. And it brings to mind a few things–

First — as a writer– it is pretty important that we don’t act like life is perfect. Because we all know it’s not. One of my biggest concerns with writing a Christmas letter or even posting pictures on Facebook is that people would believe this about me. My husband and I argue, just like any other couple. There are many times my kids don’t get along. And there are occasions where I would be downright embarrassed if you walked into my house. We struggle with being down and grumpy. We live out the consequences of sinful choices.

BUT, that being said, it is exciting to share the good news of our lives! So much of life is filled with hurt and difficulties and pain that we naturally want to celebrate the good! And so we should! As long as we can do so without giving the impression that we are somehow better than our neighbors or friends.

So let’s write and post and share the wonderful blessings of our lives with grace and kindness, doing our best to avoid giving the impression that somehow we have it all together.

And second– as a reader– let’s love our friends and family by being happy for them! Sometimes we can get a little resentful. Especially if we are going through a difficult season of our lives. We can’t understand why that person has so many blessings when we have been hit by trial after trial. And it all seems so unfair. But Romans 12:15 tells us that we are to “Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep.”

If we can keep a proper view of God’s Sovereignty, we can follow this command so much more easily. You see, it is easy to grow jealous if we perceive our lives to be tougher than somebody else’s, but if we know that our lives, as well as the life of the person we envy, are under God’s Sovereignty and His holy plan, then it makes it not only possible but delightful to rejoice with them!

I add here, as well, that no matter what it looks like, you can be guaranteed that no life is perfect on this earth and trials and struggles abound in all lives — even the ones that look perfect.

This post is specifically about Christmas but is really applicable year round. I hope that you can truly enjoy the wonderful blessings and victories of your family members and friends because this is what leads to true fellowship.

What If I Don’t “Get” The Bible?

Leave a Comment / December 15, 2014 January 12, 2019

People will sometimes share their hesitation in reading scripture because they just find the Bible uninteresting or so hard to understand. Even if we don’t say it out loud, these thoughts often lurk in the back of our minds, casting a shadow over our best intentions to read the Word.

I’ve been there myself. I, too, have struggled with disinterest, lack of comprehension, and terrible guilt about not loving God’s Word as I ought to as a believer. My lack of love for God’s Word was a big shadow over my Christian life for many years.

And so I started praying about it–asking specifically that God would give me a love for His Word.

And He answered that prayer.

It wasn’t instant and sometimes I still struggle, but He truly has instilled in me a love for scripture. It is just one of the many ways God has proven Himself faithful to me. I am not special. If you ask Him, He will do the same thing for you. There are a few things we can do to prepare our hearts, though, to be receptive to the Word.

We first (and most importantly) need to recognize our sinfulness and be sure to have a humble and submissive spirit when we read. This can take some work in this world of “rights”, with the great focus always on “me”. It’s not how we have been trained to think. I have also found in my own life that it is a purposeful choice that I have to make almost daily. I have not found humility something that I master and then can move on. Pride and selfishness sneak their way in so subtly.

We also need to bring a spirit of obedience– being ready to obey even the things that make us uncomfortable or that may require sacrifice. This can be very difficult and I can truly understand why so many people struggle with this and may even stop reading. Stepping out of our comfort zone and giving up the things we love is never easy– for any reason. But if you are willing to do this, you will not walk away from your Bible reading unchanged. Slowly, but surely, God uses His Word to transform us and make us more Christlike.

I would also like to add here– and this is really important– I do not understand every passage I read in the Bible. There are many moments where I am scratching my head, really puzzled over what a particular passage is saying or why something happened the way it did.

I know at this point, skeptics and scoffers would call me naive and perhaps even ridiculous to keep reading. But here’s the thing–I am okay if I don’t understand everything about God. In fact, if I did understand everything, I would really be bringing Him down to my level– putting Him inside a box of my own finite and limited understanding. The fact that I can’t understand everything is okay with me because I understand enough. And, quite frankly, I have to agree with Mark Twain, who said–

“It ain’t those parts of the Bible that I can’t understand that bother me, it is the parts I do understand.”

I agree. I think many times we are so disconcerted and uncomfortable about what we can understand, that we often use the excuse we can’t understand it as a reason to just give up.

And I will state right here– that is the easier choice. Yes, it is. It is easier to just say we can’t understand it and put it aside. At least it is easier if you are looking only at right now.

At this present moment.

But what I just wish I could help you understand is the great peace and joy and comfort that comes with submitting your life to Christ in all ways, first and foremost by spending time getting to know Him in the Word. I cannot even begin to tell you how God has used His Word in my life.

Again, let me just confirm once more — I am not anything special. I am just a middle-aged mom from Small-town, America. Let me also make sure you understand that I still fight sin and my selfish desires every single day. This is not about me but about what God is doing in me. He can do the same thing for you. I know He can. If you will submit and obey Him. And the first start to that is by getting into His Word.

I am going to pray that this is the year you are given the faith and the courage to pick up your Bible and read it. Really read and study it. If you do, I can promise you that you will never be the same.

Try a Growing4Life Challenge (see menu at the top of this page). All of the challenges can be used during any year. Or try a 2-year plan. Or an inductive study of a single book. Or just take a book of the Bible and read it for 30 days straight.

But do something. I can promise you that you will not be sorry.

Knowing When to Disengage

Leave a Comment / December 11, 2014 December 12, 2014

Christmas is a wonderful time for holiday parties and family reunions. But many of us dread these get-togethers because of the inevitable disagreements and heated discussions that are sure to take place. For some of us, it takes a lot of joy out of the holiday season. I think all of us have had disagreements at one time or other with people. The sin nature we are born with makes it impossible for us all to get along 24/7. Even Christians. Perhaps it is even harder for us because we know that we should get along!

So what happens when you just can’t see eye to eye with someone? I am still growing in this area but I have learned a few things.

First, it is best to ask a few questions–

Does this really matter? Will I care in 50 years? 10 years? Tomorrow?

If I don’t get my own way in this, what will happen?

If I do get my own way, what will it cost me?

If it really doesn’t matter, then it may be time to back down. I am still working on this, but the Lord has really been teaching me. Why argue over something that happened 20 years ago? My memory is terrible and I’ve learned that I am wrong at least 90% of the time.

It is also good to consider the ramifications of winning and losing an argument. We may “win”, but in the process lose respect. And we may lose and find that it doesn’t matter at all.

We can answer these questions quickly and easily in our head to see if we should disengage. Think about all the little stuff that starts arguments and end up turning into grudges that often last a lifetime. Seriously. Families, churches, and work cultures are destroyed over the silliest things.

Does it really matter? Asking this question has really helped me with the inane, unimportant disagreements.

But what about the topics that really do matter? How do we handle debates and discussions we have regarding religion, politics, entertainment, how to raise kids, or treat elderly parents? These conversations encompass abortion, homosexuality, gun control, education, and racism. And we haven’t even mentioned the long-standing disagreements over various biblical doctrines and theology. Let’s face it–there are a lot of things that truly do matter in life. And many of us have very strong opinions about these really important issues. Now what?

We need to consider two things as we take part in these deeper, more philosophical, discussions–

1. How am I presenting myself in this disagreement? What tone am I using? Am I growing frustrated? If you find that your words have become arrogant and rude and the discussion is growing heated, then it is time to step back and disengage yourself from the conversation. We can quickly ruin our Christian testimony by how we handle these situations.

2. Will I change this person’s mind? If the person is adamantly arguing against creation or the right to life or against some other clear principle from God’s Word and you see no softening of the heart and absolutely no interest in your point of view, then it’s time to disengage and pray instead. Never discount prayer. Even the hardest heart can be changed. But it won’t be by you or me. Only God can change a heart. Start praying and always be ready for opportunities that may open for a good, healthy discussion in the future. You just never know when one will be dropped in your lap!

I do offer one word of caution. It is so critical that we look to God’s Word and see what He has to say on these issues. Of course, not all things are crystal clear in scripture, but our opinions should always be drawn first and foremost from the principles within God’s Word or they can do great, long-term damage. Consider Karl Marx or Charles Darwin for just a moment. The strong opinions of these men, drawn from wrong premises, have affected the lives of millions and millions of people in a very negative way. It is so very important that our opinions are based on the Word of God and not drawn from our own human experiences or emotions.

And one final–but extremely important–thought. If we find ourselves in one of these heated discussions, let’s try to assume that the other person may not truly understand just how hurtful their tone sounded or how angry their words were and extend grace. I try to offer this grace to the other person because I know that sometimes I am misunderstood, too, and I hope that people will extend the same grace towards me.

So this holiday season, let’s try to anticipate our family reunions and work parties with great joy, remembering that they do not need to be dominated by unpleasant conversations and heated debates. Let’s disengage ourselves before we sin and instead be a bearer of peace and selflessness this holiday season. And, by all means, let us offer grace and mercy to those who offend us. For that is exactly what the Christ Child did for us, after all.

I Corinthians 13:4-7 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; ⁵does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; ⁶does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; ⁷bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.