Have you ever thought about just how powerful trust is? If we trust someone, we will —
1. Want to be like them.
2. Believe what they tell us about others.
3. Believe what they tell us about the world.
For example, think about someone you really trust and admire. If they told you something about someone, would you believe them? I had the “privilege” of hearing two sides of a personal confrontation a few months ago. Each side had their own personal interpretation on what had happened and were influencing people’s opinions of the other person by the tale they were telling to the people who trust them.
Or let’s think about our kids for a moment. We have such power to influence positively or negatively because of trust. If, as Christian parents, we love them enough to set boundaries, have the hard discussions, and live out our faith, we will build the trust that will make it so much easier for our children to follow the Lord. But if we are self-absorbed hypocrites, well, then there is little trust and our kids will probably walk away from the Lord.
How about pastors and teachers that we trust? If they tell us the entire world was created from a rock, we will give them credence, because we trust them to tell us the truth. Or perhaps they interpret a certain passage of scripture differently then we have ever heard– if we trust them, we will believe them. Or political leaders? If they tell us they will put more money in our pockets by lowering taxes, then we will…well, I guess that’s not such a good example, is it? Not a whole lot of trust when it comes to the government anymore.
My point is this: the more that others trust us, the more responsibility we have to honor that trust. We do this by —
1. Being extremely careful with our words. Words are so powerful, and even more so if people are actually listening to our words. The more people that listen, the more powerful our words become. I don’t want someone to form an opinion about someone else based on my experience with that person. Just because I didn’t have a good encounter with a particular person, doesn’t mean that everyone else won’t. And judging people on one encounter is never a good idea, anyway. It’s better to just keep our mouths shut about others. And if we are just natural “venters” then we should at least counter our words with something like this: “but I know I probably didn’t handle it right, too” or some other such phrase. (I would add here that I am talking about personal relationships and not about warnings regarding false teachers, which is something we are called to do in scripture Acts 20:29-32).
If people trust us, our words also can be used to sway them towards God or away from God. We can set a good example by speaking words of truth and faith and love and kindness or we can pull them away from God by our complaining and skeptical words.
2. Being extremely careful with whom we respect and trust as Christian leaders and pastors. If people trust us, then we want to make sure that we are being very careful with where we place our own trust so that we are directing them to godly men and women who know and follow the traditional interpretation of the Word of God (2 Thessalonians 2:15). I look for men and women who are humble and holy (Titus 1:5-9) and for one who has not fallen into heresy or capitulated to worldly compromise (James 1:27) Unfortunately, my list of respected Christian leaders grows smaller almost every day. I try to be very careful with the links (listed to the right) I recommend because of this. I don’t want to be responsible for directing anyone astray. In fact, last year, there was a link listed there of a ministry I did trust but when I became aware of some heresy in that ministry, I immediately removed it. Sometimes we don’t know about a certain ministry, but when we do find out, we need to carefully withdraw our support of that ministry.
3. Being extremely careful with our actions. Oh, this is a tricky one and I often feel the weight of it. You see, I know my kids (and probably others) are watching me to see what I am watching, reading, listening to, and wearing. If I make a choice to do or wear something that is on the line, then I will, in essence, be giving my approval of that thing. Even if, afterwards, I recognize that it was not a good decision the damage will have been done. Occasionally, I will watch a movie that may be questionable by myself first before allowing my kids to watch it but, more often than not, I just don’t watch it. In fact, the older I have gotten the more I lean towards just not wasting my time on something that includes things that offend my God. Life is just too short for that and the trust issue too great. I still do mess up sometimes, though, on this one.
Our actions, of course, also include things like flaring up in anger or gossiping to our friends or lying to our boss. People, and especially our kids, are watching us all the time. It is critical to do the right thing not only to please the Lord (which is the primary reason) but also because of the observant eyes of the ones who are looking to us as an example.
Trust is a mighty thing. If we have it, we need to be very careful with it. It can be lost in a moment by doing something stupid. And there is a constant struggle going on inside with the perpetual question: “Do I want my kids (or anyone else who trusts me) to be like me?” If I am honest, my answer is always no. I have such a long way to go in my walk with God. But I keep trying, knowing that people are watching and that I have a responsibility to be the most godly person I can be based on what I have learned about God and His Word so far.
This week’s Wednesday Wisdom comes from John MacArthur, one of my very favorite resources for biblical teaching. All of his sermons are available for free download from his website Grace to You (gty.org) and I highly recommend them. He has really helped me grow in my understanding of God’s Word. The portion I present here today is from the blog that is found on the Grace to You website. It’s about just how incredibly powerful our thought life is (something we often forget)–
Do you realize that the difference between a sincere, Spirit‑controlled, devoted, godly, obedient Christian and a defeated, weak, struggling Christian is what takes place in the mind? They may be attending the same church, active in the same ministries, and externally doing the same things, but one is defeated and the other lives a spiritually fruitful life. The difference is the thought life.
One day the difference will be made manifest. Paul told the Corinthians that when the Lord comes, He “will both bring to light the things hidden in the darkness and disclose the motives of men’s hearts” (1 Corinthians 4:5). Jesus said something similar: “Nothing is hidden that will not become evident, nor anything secret that shall not be known and come to light” (Luke 8:17). And, “Beware of the leaven of the Pharisees, which is hypocrisy. But there is nothing covered up that will not be revealed, and hidden that will not be known” (Luke 12:1-2).
I urge you to look deeply into the mirror of God’s Word (James 1:23-24), which is a powerful “discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12, KJV). As Jeremiah counseled Israel, “Wash your heart from evil, O Jerusalem, that you may be saved. How long will your wicked thoughts lodge within you?” (Jeremiah 4:14). And as Paul said, “let us cleanse ourselves from all defilement of flesh and spirit, perfecting holiness in the fear of God” (2 Corinthians 7:1).
How can we deal with the problem of evil thoughts? The process is like mortifying any other sin.
First, confess and forsake the sin. “Let the wicked forsake his way, and the unrighteous man his thoughts; and let him return to the Lord, and He will have compassion on him; and to our God, for He will abundantly pardon” (Isaiah 55:7, emphasis added). If your thought life harbors sins of immorality, sins of anger toward someone, sins of vengeance, sins of bitterness, sins of covetousness, or whatever, confess them to God. Repent and ask forgiveness. If we confess, He is faithful and just to forgive and keep on cleansing (1 John 1:9).
Refuse to entertain those thoughts. Purpose to abandon your wrong thought patterns immediately and begin to build new, righteous habits. If you find yourself slipping into old ways of thinking, confess your sin and refuse once again to give place to evil thoughts. Consciously direct your mind to fix itself on pure things: “Whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things” (Philippians 4:8). In other words, reprogram your mind with truth and righteousness.
Feed on the Word of God. “Your word I have treasured in my heart, that I may not sin against You” (Psalm 119:11). The Word insulates the mind. It strengthens the heart. It occupies the soul and fortifies it against evil thoughts. Only as we use the sword of the Spirit skillfully can we mortify our fleshly imaginations (Ephesians 6:17).
Avoid evil attractions. Don’t expose yourself to activities, images, or conversations that provoke evil thoughts. Like Job, make a covenant with your eyes (Job 31:1)—or with your ears, or with whatever sensations lead you into evil thoughts. Refuse to feed any tendencies that draw your imagination into wickedness. This is what Jesus meant figuratively when he said, “If your right eye makes you stumble, tear it out and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. If your right hand makes you stumble, cut it off and throw it from you; for it is better for you to lose one of the parts of your body, than for your whole body to go into hell” (Matthew 5:29-30).
Cultivate the love of God. David said in Psalm 119:97, “O how I love Your law! It is my meditation all the day.” And then four verses later he said, “I have restrained my feet from every evil way.” If we set our minds on things above, things on the earth will cease to hold the same fascination for us (Colossians 3:2). “Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (Matthew 6:21)—and where your affections are set, your thoughts will be there as well.
David ended Psalm 19, his great paean to the sufficiency of Scripture, with these words:
Who can discern his errors? Acquit me of hidden faults. Also keep back Your servant from presumptuous sins; let them not rule over me; then I will be blameless, and I shall be acquitted of great transgression. Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my rock and my Redeemer (vv. 12-14).
That is the state of mind of every truly godly person. It is also the goal of biblical instruction: “love from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith” (1 Timothy 1:5).
So, how’s your thought life?
You can find this post here, along with many other helpful resources.
Being a Christian soldier in this culture is exhausting. Everywhere you turn, Satan is attacking. The battle is being fought all around us, leaving us with little, if any, time to put down our battle gear and take a rest.
Sometimes the enemy’s deadly sword looks like a big, giant lollipop coming at you. It’s really only through serious study and discernment that we can pick up on the fact that it is a sword made to look like a lollipop.
Think with me for a moment about the book The Shack. It’s just a story, right? But it single-handedly changed how many Christians think about God. I read this quote recently and it really summed up why The Shack is a problem–
“Christian idolatry is betrayed in this telltale phrase: ‘I like to think of God as________________.’ I like to think of God as a loving Father–as a mother–as an artist–as forgiving–as an architect…But the problem is that such thoughts are often coupled with a denial of something else the Scriptures teach about God–for example, that He is Judge…[We] don’t like to think of Him as a judge, but as a loving Savior.”
That is exactly why I believe this book is dangerous. It is a very one-sided and incomplete view of who God is. And yet evangelical Christians, by the thousands, love this book.
And so if you stand up and say, “Hey, wait a minute! Something’s not right here!” we are labeled.
We are judgmental, critical, narrow-minded, ridiculous, unintelligent, among a variety of other names.
And we get tired. Exhausted, even.
We decide the hassle isn’t worth it and we shut up (exactly what our enemy wants, by the way).
But these kinds of subtle deceptions aren’t our only battlefield. No, standing for Truth even goes into the arena of entertainment, dress, and life where somehow in this crazy mixed-up world, we find ourselves being ostracized and looked down upon by Christians because we believe books that glamorize witchcraft and the occult are dangerous, R-rated movies inappropriate fodder for our minds, bikinis inappropriate clothing for our daughters, and gambling and drinking unacceptable ways to spend our God-given time and money.
Have you stopped recently and thought about how CRAZY that is??
Sometimes it feels quite surreal that this is what modern Christianity has become in the year 2013. This can’t possibly be reality, can it?
But this is not the Christianity I was taught as a girl and this is certainly not Christianity as defined in the Bible.
Here are a few things the Bible says —
I should not even look at evil (Psalm 101:3; 119:37)
Those who practice sorcery will be burned in the lake of fire (Revelation 21:8)
God hates sexual immorality, whether it’s in our life or on a screen (Colossians 3:5)
To not let filthiness, coarse jesting, and foolish talk be among us (Ephesians 5:4)
To be separate from the world (James 1:27)
I am to be modest (I Timothy 2:9)
That I am different if I am a believer (I Peter 1:14-16)
I am not sure when Satan made his inroad into the Church. Perhaps it was when marriage became less sacred and divorce more common, leading to a breakdown of the family. Perhaps it was when shallow, me-centered music became part of the worship service. Maybe it was when worship became more about “The Show” than about God and pastoring became more about entertaining than about feeding and caring for the flock. But, most likely, it was when the church was sold the lie that people will only be won for the Gospel if we become like them. And thus the word “relevance” pretty much destroyed any purity and separation that was left within the churches.
I don’t know when exactly it happened. And I guess it doesn’t really matter. What matters now is how we Christians respond to this madness.
Are we going to melt into the crowd and do what everybody else is doing? Or are we going to take a stand?
Are we going to fight for the spiritual health of our families? Or are we going to die on the alter of peer pressure?
Are we going to grow tired and weary and give up the battle? Or are we going to stay and fight in the strength of the Lord?
My husband and I are tired. So tired. It is especially wearying on the home front, where we have spent many years trying to explain from scripture why many of the popular movies, music, video games, and books are not glorifying to God, all while most of their friends are out having a good time doing all that we are encouraging our kids not to do. We feel so outnumbered and have even questioned our sanity on a number of occasions.
But whenever we take a moment to re-look at something or to question a stand, we end up back at the same place–God’s Word calls us to live holy, pure lives separate from the world. Period.
If we want to serve Him, we can’t ignore this command. We can’t get around it. We can’t push it under a box. We are soldiers in the Lord’s army and this is a big part of our duty.
And, so…here we are. Weary warriors but still fighting. Anyone else with us?
I stumbled upon this song quite by accident but it struck a chord within me. In a one-dimensional world of Christian music, mostly based only on ME, this song fell like refreshing rain as this turns our focus instead towards God and glorifying Him, no matter what befalls us. What is the purpose of trials, anyway? The line in the song says it best: “I long for nothing else, as long as YOU are glorified.” Comfort, convenience, pain-free, tear-free are all nice things to be but they are no guarantee when we walk with the Lord. This songs says it better than I ever could. (I have included a link after the lyrics, if you’d like to hear it)–
As Long As You Are Glorified
Shall I take from Your hand Your blessings
Yet not welcome any pain,
Shall I thank You for days of sunshine
Yet grumble in days of rain
Shall I love You in times of plenty
Then leave You in days of drought
Shall I trust when I reap a harvest
But when winter winds blow then doubt
Oh, let Your will be done in me
In Your love I will abide
Oh I long for nothing else as long
As You are glorified.
Are You good only when I prosper
And true only when I’m filled
Are you King only when I’m carefree
And God only when I’m well
You are good when I’m poor and needy
You are true when I’m parched and dry
You still reign in the deepest valley
You’re still God in the darkest night.
So quiet my restless heart!
Quiet my restless heart!
Quiet me restless heart in You.
All around us we see youth from Christian homes who have turned their backs on the one true God. A decent percentage of them have walked away to live lives in utter, immoral chaos. But, more often than not, most are trying to live good lives, attending church on the Christian holidays, and trying to make a decent living and raise a responsible family…all in their own power, not truly knowing the Savior who gave His life for them.
When I read Titus 2, I realize just how far we have strayed from God’s plan for who we are supposed to be. Paul, in this letter to Titus, defines what we are to look like as believers in this passage.
These words seem almost ridiculous in a culture that prides itself on staying young, partying, living for the moment, and having a good time. Here are the adjectives that should be used to describe a godly man: sober, reverent, temperate, sound in faith, in love, in patience.
And godly older women: reverent in behavior, not slanderers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things. We read on to discover what these good things are.
Somehow, in the last five years or so, I became one of the older women. It comes to all of us at one time or another. And here is what the Bible says I am supposed to be teaching younger women: to love their husbands and children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, and obedient to their husbands.
And let’s go on to the young men, who do not escape Paul’s descriptions. Here is what he says they are to be like: sober-minded, in all things showing yourself to be a pattern of good works; in doctrine showing integrity, reverence, incorruptibility,sound speech that cannot be condemned, that one who is an opponent may be ashamed, having nothing evil to say of you.
So, if this is what true believers are to look like, then why do so many of us not look like this? Or, in the light of our imperfections, perhaps an even more important question is: why do believers not want to look like this?
Could it be that we older people have dropped the ball?
It starts in our homes, where many of us allow our toddlers to control everything from the TV to the schedules. And then it blossoms into the churches, where we have allowed the youth to determine everything from worship style to church programs. When and why did the older generation relinquish their responsibility?
Was it when we, too, became more enamored with our stuff than with our Lord?
Was it when we got scared of the accusations and name-calling (fuddy-duddy, traditionalist) and ran away?
Was it when we made ourselves our priority and stopped spending time with our adult children?
Or perhaps it was when we started listening to worldly wisdom instead of God’s Word?
I have no idea, but somewhere there has been a breakdown of godly living being passed down from one generation to the next.
May the Lord help us not to be one of those weak links! I pray that my kids and grandkids would be stronger and holier and bolder for Jesus Christ than I am! I want my family to grow stronger in the Lord, not weaker.
Yes, this takes work–the kind that never ends. It takes late nights and long phone conversations and confrontations. Sometimes it is lonely. But we have a responsibility and we need to step up to the plate and take it seriously! Let’s stand strong and encourage those who come behind us to stand strong with us!
But speak thou the things which become sound doctrine: 2 that the aged men be sober, grave, temperate, sound in faith, in charity, in patience. 3 The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things; 4 that they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, 5 to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed. 6 Young men likewise exhort to be sober minded. 7 In all things shewing thyself a pattern of good works: in doctrine shewing uncorruptness, gravity, sincerity, 8 sound speech, that cannot be condemned; that he that is of the contrary part may be ashamed, having no evil thing to say of you. Titus 2:1-8
Last Sunday was Father’s Day. What a wonderful day to celebrate the men who have shaped us and who are shaping our children. I feel indeed blessed to not only have had an exceptional father, but also to have an exceptional father for my children.
I heard this blog post read the other day and was struck by its simplicity, its truth, and its applicability (is that a word??) to both dads and moms. But before we move on to the article, we need to face a hard truth: it is a rare father that does all 21 of these things. And mine certainly didn’t. But then he (and my husband) both have their own unique personalities and good traits that aren’t listed in this article.
If we are mothers reading this, then let’s appreciate the good things that are written here and also the wonderful things that may not be included here about our fathers and husbands. Let’s apply what we can and become better mothers.
If you are a father reading this, then I present this as encouragement and inspiration–not as a source of dissatisfaction or hopelessness. Be the best, most godly father you can be with the resources you have. That is all God asks of you.
And on a personal note, in this article the author shares how his father rubbed his legs when he was suffering from growing pains as a child. His mention of this brought one of my own favorite memories of my father rushing to my memory. How well I remember him rubbing my aching legs in the middle of the night, while we talked about what heaven will be like. It is one of my fondest memories of time spent with my dad.
This was written by father and pastor, JoshMcPherson. You can find his original post here.
I don’t want to be a good dad—I want to be a great dad.
But the longer I live and more ministry I do, the more I have come to realize there are precious few examples of grace in action when it comes to fatherhood. So on this Father’s Day, I wanted to take a moment, heed Paul’s exhortation (Eph. 6:1), and honor my own father, Greg.
Was he perfect? Nope.
Did he make mistakes? Sure.
Does he wish he could do things differently? I have no idea.
But in a land where few men finish well when it comes to the daunting task of fatherhood, I’ve found myself reflecting and marveling at the grace of God in my dad’s life. He loved Jesus, repented often, and poured his life into his two sons. How much more could a boy ask for?
In your life, Dad, I have found a roadmap for my own role as father. So I wanted to take a few moments, and tell you thanks from the heart of a grateful son. Specifically, thank you for . . .
1. NEVER PUTTING ME DOWN
Not once. You never made fun of me, mocked me, or talked about me like I wasn’t there. Never was I the butt of your jokes. In everything you built me up, encouraged me, and moved me forward. You always spoke of my future with great hope. “The Lord will give you great opportunities, Josh. Jesus has great plans for you, son.” This sort of prophetic encouragement every boy needs, and I got it in bushels. Thanks, Dad.
2. RUNNING INTO MY ROOM
. . . the night I screamed in agony from growing pains. I was eight. You were half asleep. Tripping on a toy you went sprawling across the room in your underwear. We both burst out laughing. Then you rubbed my leg-cramps for an hour. I slept in the next day; you were up at 5 a.m. and out the door. You put my need to be comforted in front of your need for sleep. Thanks, Dad.
You loved Jesus passionately and it drew me in.
3. BEING THE TOUGHEST MAN I KNOW
. . . and crying in front of me often. It’s good for a boy to see both. I’ve seen you cut down trees, fix tractors, build things, and tackle gut-wrenching church conflict with unflinching courage and razor-sharp biblical clarity. I’ve also seen you listen intently, hug often, and tear up quickly when moved by someone’s pain or God’s grace. Not the helpless, whimpering, cowardly sort of tears—the genuine, earnest, heartfelt tears of a man who feels and thinks deeply. You cry easily when talking about Jesus, the gospel, redemption, and the day God called you into ministry. I love that. Thanks, Dad.
I never felt more safe and loved than when held in your arms.
4. RAISING YOUR HANDS
. . . and singing loudly with the church. I distinctly remember as a young boy looking up and seeing tears roll down your cheek during worship. I couldn’t articulate it then, but I knew that you were singing to someone who meant everything to you, who was great and big and awesome and worthy of your allegiance, and who gave you great joy. That is a gift to a young man. You didn’t tell me to love Jesus passionately—you loved Jesus passionately and it drew me in. Thanks, Dad.
5. SPANKING US, THEN HUGGING US
That is a powerful parenting combination that no child’s heart can resist. I never felt more safe and loved than when held in your arms as the sting of the spank faded and the assurance of your unshakable love filled my little heart. Redemptive discipline is a precious thing. Thanks, Dad.
6. LEAVING ME NOTES ON THE BATHROOM MIRROR
Sometimes they were a verse written out you’d read that morning, or a prayer for something big I was facing, or an apology for something said the night before. No matter the occasion, they were always encouraging, full of Scripture, and right on point. This told me you were thinking about me even when you were gone, and were vested in my success. Huge. I still have most of them to this day. Thanks, Dad.
Always you were there, Bible in hand, heart open, mind working.
7. PUTTING MY FRIENDS TO WORK
Mowing the lawn, cleaning the garage, working on a project in the shop. Every time my friends came over to our house, you worked us like dogs. I could never figure out why all the guys always wanted to come to my house.
But I figured it out later: you treated them like men. And then you’d fire up the BBQ and spend the rest of the day asking us what we wanted to do with our life that would make an eternal impact. Thanks, Dad.
8. READING YOUR BIBLE EVERY MORNING
That is the biggest memory I have: you, at the kitchen table, worn Bible in front of you, studying away. Not checking Facebook. Not returning email. Not reading the paper. Soaking in the Word. Sometimes tears were running down your face. Sometimes your eyebrows were burrowed in thought. Sometimes your head was bowed in prayer. Sometimes your pen was scratching furiously in your journal. But always you were there, Bible in hand, heart open, mind working. It left an indelible imprint on the life of a young boy about how a real man starts his day. Thanks, Dad.
9. LAUGHING LOUD, LONG, AND LOTS
At the dinner table. On a hunting trip. Or just whenever. Some of the most fun memories I have include watching you slap your thigh, throw back your head, and roar with laughter. I loved hearing your laugh. Still do to this day. You took many things in life blood-earnest, but you laughed at yourself often. That is a gift that has served me well in ministry. Thanks, Dad.
10. CHARGING ME RENT
You did this the day I turned 18 and was still living in your house. All of my other friends learned to freeload. I learned to work. And it wasn’t done as a cruel punishment, but a teaching moment for taking responsibility and growing up as a man. Thanks, Dad.
You were not living life unless you’re serving others and God’s kingdom.
11. LOVING ME WITHOUT QUESTION OR HESITATION
I have questioned many things in my life, doubted many things, faced many unknowns. But there is one thing of which I have never questioned: your love for me has been unwavering and relentless, dependable and true. It’s taught me a lot about how I am loved by my better heavenly Father. Thanks, Dad.
12. TURNING DOWN SPEAKING ENGAGEMENTS
. . . so you “wouldn’t miss the important years.” I didn’t appreciate it then. I do now. Thanks, Dad.
13. WRESTLING WITH US AS KIDS
. . . every night when you came home from work. You were probably exhausted from work, but knew we were waiting behind the couch to launch a surprise attack. You could have said you were too tired. But you didn’t. You wrestled until, giggling and short of breath, we begged for mercy (and asked for more at the same time). Thanks, Dad.
14. FILLING THE DINNER TABLE WITH STORIES OF GOSPEL VICTORIES
These were the best moments ever. To hear of a broken person made whole through the redeeming work of Jesus. My big takeaway from our dinner conversations was that you were not living life unless you’re serving others and investing in God’s kingdom. You whetted our appetite for gospel ministry early. Thanks, Dad.
15. READING THE PICTURE BIBLE EVERY NIGHT BEFORE BED
And oh, how you brought it to life! When Moses faced the Red Sea, I was overwhelmed with despair. When David stared down Goliath, I trembled with fear. When Jesus rose from the grave, we cheered and clapped for joy. Dad, when you read the Bible, The Story came to life. It’s no wonder your two boys have given their life to teaching others that same Bible. Thanks, Dad.
16. BUYING A HOT TUB
. . . so we could have a place to “hash things over.” Some of my best memories as a teen are coming home after something happened at school or with sports or with friends and asking, “Wanna hit the tub, Dad?” and knowing that you’d never say no, so we could have life-shaping conversations. Thanks, Dad.
17. TEACHING US THE IMPORTANCE OF MENTORS
You did this by having multiple mentors yourself and regularly showing us how they helped you. To this day, learning from men around me is a deeply held value of mine, one that has served me, my wife, our family, and our church well. Thanks, Dad.
A wise man is not a perfect man, but a repentant man.
18. SITTING ON THE FRONT ROW
. . . at church, Bible open, taking furious notes and bellowing hearty “Amen’s” while I preach. In this, you show me what it’s like for a man to be a lifelong learner.
19. CONFESSING SIN OFTEN
You were not perfect, but when you messed up, you were quick to confess it and repent of it. These made me feel safe, like I could follow you without fear. There was integrity in your life, and it gave me confidence in your leadership. You taught me by your example that a wise man is not a perfect man, but a repentant man. Thanks, Dad.
20. BEING THE FIRST PERSON I WANTED TO CALL
. . . when we found out Ella Mae would be born with Spina Bifida. That was a dark-night-of-the-soul moment. A confusing time. And all I knew was I needed to call my dad. You listened and affirmed your love for us and God’s plan in all the pain. Then you prayed with us and invited us over to the house. We needed to “talk it out and make a plan for this new little blessing God’s bringing into our lives.” I needed someone to tell me that day that this little girl would be a blessing, and you did. Thanks, Dad.
21. LOVING MY WIFE LIKE YOUR OWN DAUGHTER
She feels your love, she feels your support. She knows that if we came to you for counsel with a relationship conflict between us, that you’d take her side first before you’d take mine. “I think we love her more than we love you, Josh. I know we like her more,” you’ve said with a wink and a laugh. But it’s communicated the point. And that’s a wonderful thing for a daughter-in-law to know. Thanks, Dad.
I could go on but I’m way over word-count. So thanks, Dad, for loving Jesus and living a life that makes it easy to remember and honor. I love you deeply and am still watching closely as you follow Jesus and finish well. You have lived a life worth emulating, and I’ve been taking notes. May I learn from God’s grace in your life to love my children the same.
I was taking a Sunday afternoon nap. Sound asleep, I was suddenly jarred awake by a little white ball of fur leaping on my bed. My dog, Belle, did a quick circle and then hopped back down and literally ran out the door. I settled down for a moment or two before she returned, this time making her way up to my pillow and laying down right above my head, panting madly.
I knew she was trying to tell me something, but I could not figure out what it was. The other night, she had acted similarly during a storm, but this particular afternoon the weather was clear and, to my knowledge, nothing else traumatic was going on. What was she trying to tell me? When I asked her what was wrong, she didn’t magically speak to me but instead just stared at me, as if trying to send a message with those dark brown eyes.
Trying to understand what she was trying to tell me felt a little like trying to understand what God is trying to tell me about a specific decision sometimes. Sometimes I just want to say, “God, how about if you send a lone bolt of lightening for YES and big loud thunderclap for NO?” Wouldn’t that be nice?
Unfortunately, it is a rare occasion that God makes the answer to a decision extremely clear, but–on the bright side– there are some good biblical principles to follow which will help us discern the right direction–
1) What does the Bible say? Search the scriptures and discern everything God’s Word has to say about what you are agonizing over. You may have to do a generalized search. For example, if you are trying to decide about a new house or car, then search God’s Word for everything you can find about material wealth and our attitude towards it. If you are married and trying to decide about a business lunch with an attractive co-worker, then find all the passages you can on marriage and falling into adultery.
2) Obey what you know. There are some basics in God’s Word that we know we are to do: The Ten Commandments, loving God with all our hearts, loving others as we love ourselves, submitting to our husbands, loving our wives, submitting to our bosses, praying for our leaders. Let’s obey in the areas that are clear, so that we will be in right relationship with God and will be better able to understand the Holy Spirit’s guidance in the areas that are unclear.
3) Examine your motives. Is this decision all about me? Am I concerned with my feelings, my experience, my life, at the cost of anybody else’s?
4) Think about the outcome. What will be the fruit of this decision? Will it mean being in debt? Will it put you far away from family? Will this damage your reputation? Will this decision be a detriment to your relationship with Christ or others? Just spend a few minutes contemplating the fruit of the decision.
And if you do all of that and you still don’t know, I’ll tell you what I do: I pick a path and start walking, all the while praying that the Lord will close the doors if I didn’t pick the right one. He is faithful! He does show us which way we should go when we are in fellowship with Him; when we truly desire to please Him more than fulfilling our own selfish desires.
So much confusion and strife results when I make a decision based on what I want…when I live my life based on my desires and ambitions. I know this, because I have done it many times and continue to struggle with this.
Life can be tough and we rarely, if ever, get a message from God telling us what to do. But, thankfully, we have His Word as a guide and His promise to care for us. This is great comfort in the midst of making a decision.
I Peter 5: 6-11Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. Resist him, steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same sufferings are experienced by your brotherhood in the world. But may the God of all grace, who called us to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a while, perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle you. To Him be the glory and the dominion forever and ever. Amen.
My daughter was making a fruit pizza for a party she was attending. She even generously volunteered to make an extra one for us to eat. I love homemade snacks that I don’t have to make!
She went to the store and bought the ingredients and then came home to get to work. As I came into the kitchen she was looking at a jar of strawberry glaze she had purchased to spread on top of the pizzas. On the front were the words “Naturally Fresh”. The pleasant label caused us both to assume that the glaze was full of natural ingredients.
“Do you think this will be any good?” She wondered as she opened the jar, took a bit on a spoon, and tasted it.
She then handed me the spoon, “here, you taste it.”
Ugh. It was the most fake and disgusting” strawberry” flavor I have EVER tasted. It was just awful.
I picked up the jar and looked at the ingredient list. I immediately understood why it tasted so terrible. There was less than 2% of “natural and artificial flavors.” Instead of good and fresh ingredients, this red and sticky substance was made out of of high-fructose corn syrup, food starch, man-made chemicals and, of course, red dye.
That certainly was a good lesson in reading ingredients for both of us.
And it made me think of how often we Christians do this same thing with books and media, too. We will see the word “God” or “Christian” on the cover and naively purchase it. But instead of studying the contents, we just eat it right up, never even stopping to investigate if it is biblically correct.
As I walked through a Christian bookstore the other week, I was amazed at the number of books that had covers alluding to Christianity while containing themes that were completely unbiblical. With just a little investigating, I saw some that were just shallow and sugary and all about self. A select few were so philosophically off as to be very dangerous. And many were just self-help books couched in “Christianese”– very full of man’s wisdom, with little, if any, of God’s.
And then yesterday, I was listening to a Christian song on the radio. The voice singing was lovely and the tune was catchy but as I listened to the words, I realized that the message was completely unbiblical. This happens frequently. Christian music is often written by artists that care nothing for theology, and their lyrics show this clearly.
Now we can eat this stuff and it won’t kill us. But, just as that strawberry glaze is not good for our body’s system, so these unbiblical books and other things claiming to be Christian are not good for our spiritual system. We need to fill our bodies and our minds with healthy food. Only by studying God’s Word can we develop that proper grid for what is true and right.
We have a responsibility to bring good, healthy food into our homes and feed it to our families. But even greater than this responsibility is the one to bring good, healthy spiritual food into our homes. We should always stand guard against the fake. We need to keep our eyes open for the stuff that looks real, but isn’t real at all.
Let’s pay attention. We have to pay attention. We cannot let down our guard.
Oh, and on a side note, the fruit pizza was delicious without any glaze at all!
I remember hearing a really great series by Nancy Leigh DeMoss on the controversial topic of modesty. I thought this may be a good time of year to remind us women what modesty means and so I headed over to Revive Our Hearts to see if there was anything written regarding this subject.
I’ve always thought I hold a pretty high standard, but as I read this article, I was challenged to remove some items of clothing occupying space in my closet. I hope that you have a heart yielded to God and His will as you read this helpful article, just in time for our summer wardrobes–
There’s no question about it. The decision to live your life for God’s glory will require some tough choices. It will probably take more time to shop, and your clothing may actually cost a little more.
You may not look as cool or “in” as you would like, and sometimes you just might have to stand out in a crowd as someone who is different. But remember, you are different. You have a different citizenship, and you were bought with a costly price!
As you evaluate your wardrobe, you’ll need courage to ask specific, practical questions, like these:
Is there writing (or pictures) on my clothing that emphasizes private parts of my body?
If someone were to look at me, where would their eyes naturally go—to my face, eyes, hips, thighs, breasts, etc.? Where do I want men looking when I come into view?
Is the fabric that I’m wearing too sheer? Could someone see through it to private parts of my body?
Am I wearing tight, form-fitting clothes? (A well-known designer once said, “Your clothing should be tight enough to show that you’re a woman, but loose enough to show that you’re a lady!”)
Do my pants fit correctly? Are they too tight? Do they cling to the hips, thighs, etc.?
Am I wearing anything provocative? (Today, underwear has become outerwear—often designed to be provocative. To expose undergarments is to tease men.)
As you examine individual items in your wardrobe, stand in front of a mirror. Bend forward and ask yourself, “Can I see private parts that a man (other than your husband, if you’re married) shouldn’t see?” If the answer is “yes,” you are dressed immodestly.
Look from all angles— front, back, and sides—while walking, sitting, moving, stretching, and bending. Remember, we often bend over to pick up packages or children, or to get into and out of a car. Ask yourself, “What will others notice and see? Where will others’ attention be drawn—towards breasts, hips, thighs, etc.? Why do I want to wear this outfit? Why do I like this style?”
Your heart attitude is key here. Ask the Lord to help you represent Him well. Ask for a teachable, open, obedient heart. If you’re married, ask your husband to help you understand what your clothes and appearance communicate to men. Ask him if your clothing is modest. If you’re not married, ask your father or an older woman these same questions.
Modesty Resolutions
Prayerfully consider, “Am I truly modest—according to God’s standard?” Then determine to be a woman after God’s own heart. Do you desire for your appearance to reveal a modest, godly heart?
If so, here are seven choices I challenge you to make:
Resolve to live to please God and to bring Him glory.
Yield (dedicate) your body to God. Say, “Lord, this body belongs to You.”
Resolve to be modest because that’s what pleases God.
Resolve to be pure (inwardly and outwardly).
Resolve never to dress in a way that could tempt men to have lustful thoughts.
Be willing to stand against the culture, whenever the culture is contrary to the Word and ways of God.
Be humble and open to the input of others.
Remember that it’s possible to have a modest outward appearance while having the heart of a Pharisee (critical, self-righteous, and judgmental towards those who do not see things the way you do). Modesty doesn’t mean that you have the corner on truth. Give God room and time to work in the lives of other people—don’t say, “Because I see it that way, that’s how it should be.” Remember, you’re not the Holy Spirit! Ask God to help you communicate modesty to others in a winsome way. Speak truth with a tender heart, compassion, and love.
Make the truth as attractive as possible.
-This article was written by Nancy Leigh DeMoss and can be found here, along with many other good articles.
I couldn’t help noticing the other night, as I picked strawberries, the incredible variety of sizes, shapes, and shades. No berry is alike. There are some that are small and misshapen and others that are large and picture perfect. Some are pinkish, others are bright red, and some are red on one side, while remaining a whitish green on the other. Some ripen a bit at a time while others seem to ripen quickly and completely. It is amazing that these ripe berries, no matter their size or shape, taste delicious.
That is unless they have matured while laying on the garden bed of dirt. Then it often gets too moist and they perish to mold and rot and insects. I throw countless berries away every year, as I will reach for a beautiful, bright red berry just to find that one side has rotted away or a hole has been bored into it by some insect. Berries like that, while appearing attractive at first glance, are good for nothing.
Oh my, how much like people these berries are. Just as there are all shapes and sizes of berries, so there are all shapes and sizes of people. Is a large, perfectly shaped berry better than a small, misshapen berry? The world would tell you that it is, but a berry is a berry and sometimes those small, misshapen berries taste better than the large ones. Of course, most of us prefer the pretty berries and anything that is not so pretty probably gets sent to the jam factory. But when you have your own patch (or pick your own at your local CSA) you realize that there are very few perfect berries in life. You also realize that it doesn’t really matter.
I get so frustrated at the narrow definition this culture has for beauty. You have to be a certain body shape (which 90% of us aren’t) and a certain height and weight. We are told that this nose is too small and that one is too large for there to be true beauty. That one is too long-waisted and this one’s hair too thin. Who in the world makes these rules, anyway? Is anyone else sick of being told what is beautiful by Hollywood and magazine editors?
The other thing that we should consider is that, just like every berry ripens in its own given time, so it is, too, with people. We have to be careful not to expect someone to be a mature Christian, when they are not at that point yet in their walk with Jesus Christ, showing themselves to still be a shade of pinkish-green instead of bright red. Oh, the frustration and damage that is caused by harsh judgement on and unrealistic expectations for baby believers. We need to be very, very careful about this.
We can’t control our body size and shape (I am referring here to our healthy size and shape, not overweight, which can be changed) and we can’t control how fast the people around us mature as believers, but there is something we can control–we can keep ourselves out of the dirt.
Laying in the dirt leads to mold and disease and insect infestation. As a new creature in Christ, we have the power through the work of the Holy Spirit, to keep ourselves up and out of the dirt and muck of the world. If we don’t do it, it is very likely that we will end up good for nothing, at least as far as Christianity and sharing the gospel is concerned.
So let’s stop worrying about the things we can’t change and let’s stop casting arrogant, unforgiving eyes on those around us, and let’s start focusing on the thing we can control–keeping ourselves out of the dirt.
And there you have it– a few lessons from the strawberry patch!
