Life – Page 27 – Growing 4 Life

This Is the Day

4 Comments / February 10, 2014 February 10, 2014

As I have muddled through the last few days, I have struggled. The winter has been long and filled with snow and ice. It has been absolutely frigid and cloudy most days and now I am fighting a cold. It is starting to feel like spring will never arrive.

But then God reminded me that He has made this day and I am to rejoice in it (Psalm 118:24). These days. This winter. And I have to continue to be faithful even when all I feel like doing is putting on sweatpants, wrapping up in a blanket, and watching TV.

There are no conditions attached to this verse. Wouldn’t it be easier for our flesh if there were?

This is the day the Lord hath made, rejoice if everything is going your way or rejoice if you got that promotion you wanted, or rejoice if the sun is shining.

But, as much as we would like to, we can find no conditions attached to this verse. We are to rejoice in each new day God grants us.

The best way to get a good start on our day is to get up with these words on our lips: “This is the day the Lord hath made, I will rejoice and be glad in it!”

There is lot to be done and I am to do it cheerfully! How much easier is this task if I acknowledge that, no matter what the day brings I can rejoice, knowing that God is in control and that I can rest in His hands, trusting Him.

And, ironically, it is when I can fight my flesh and actively accomplish my work for the day, I am energized and fulfilled. On the other hand, when I give in to my fleshly cravings and lay around all day, I am filled with lethargy and a vague sense of dissatisfaction.

So which will it be today? I choose to rejoice!

I am so thankful that God cares enough about me to remind me that He has made this day and that I am to rejoice in it!

Thankless Jobs

6 Comments / February 6, 2014 February 6, 2014

As my husband crawled into bed last night, exhausted after several nights of little sleep and hours and hours out in the cold, he said these words to me: “There is one thing about snow removal. It is such a thankless job.”

He went on to talk about his day and the lack of gratitude he gets in the snow removal business. I dealt with my own end of that this past week, where the east has been coated in snow and ice. I am the lucky girl who gets to take the phone calls. And, trust me, people do not call to say how awesome of a job we did. It is always a complaint. Mostly by people who aren’t very kind as they express their frustrations. Now, I will say this, some people are very nice when they call and that helps so much. And I am also thankful that we have an AWESOME crew who does a GREAT job and so the calls are fairly infrequent. But it does remind me of a couple of things —

1. We need to thank someone who does something we take for granted. Someone is working hard, often during the hours you are asleep, so that you can get to work tomorrow or walk safely on the sidewalks leading into the bank or the grocery store. If you see them out working, tell them you appreciate them. But this isn’t just about snow removal. Think about other thankless jobs people do each and every day and then intentionally start thanking those people.

2. We need to do our duty, with or without the praise of men. Sometimes we find ourselves relying on someone saying thank you or good job and when it doesn’t come we get discouraged and want to quit. But Colossians 3:23-24 says And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance; for you serve the Lord Christ. Yes! We serve the Lord, not man. Whether we are doing the dishes, plowing snow, or collecting garbage, we are to do it out of a heart of love for our Lord.

And so the long winter continues, but it has not been without its life lessons and good reminders. And while I am thankful for what God is teaching me, I do find myself longing for the sunny summer days. I guess they will come soon enough.

The Gray-Spotted Beetle

Leave a Comment / February 3, 2014 January 27, 2015

Since I don't have a picture of this unique car, I figured I'd create my own! — Since I don’t have a picture of this unique car, I figured I’d create my own!

We had the special privilege of gathering with my parents for a meal over the weekend. We started reminiscing a bit and my father took special pleasure in bringing up one of those memories that teen-aged grandkids just love to hear about their parents!

I was a junior in high school and I had just left play practice. I was speeding along home, going quite fast–probably because I was never one to dawdle along. When it was time to go home, I wanted to get there as soon as possible. I was (and continue to be) someone who moves with purpose. Sometimes that makes following the speed limit a challenge for me! ;)

ANYWAY…as I was speeding along home in my parent’s dark blue VW Beetle I spotted a car in my rear view mirror. As it got closer to me, my heart sank. That car looked suspiciously like my father’s car, an old yellow VW beetle covered with gray spots, made by the primer used to cover the rust spots until it could be given a proper paint job. Trust me, it was a one-of-a-kind car, making it easy for me to realize that I was probably in a bit of trouble!

And I was not disappointed. When I arrived home, I was given a much needed lecture on why I shouldn’t go so fast. And while I do not really remember the lecture or anything after spotting that car in my mirror, I do vividly remember the moment I spotted that car.

Because at that moment, everything changed. The person who was the authority in my life was watching me. I loved my father deeply and did not want him to be disappointed in me. And he was disappointed in me. I instinctively knew this.

It was a good lesson for the teen-aged me. We need to remember that, at any given time, your father may be watching you!

But there’s more. As you may have guessed.

As I pondered this story from long ago, I was reminded of my tendency to forget that God is always watching me. He sees when I talk in an unpleasant tone to my husband. He hears my angry voice or my crude language. He sits and watches TV with me and He is in my car, listening to my music. He knows if I am honoring Him with my time, my money, and my body. Because He knows everything.

I think if I could remember this, I would be much more prone to be more careful with my choices. Oh, how disappointed He must be in me so many times! I hate to disappoint my heavenly father even more than I hated disappointing my earthly father. And yet I do it again and again, so easily forgetting that nothing goes unseen.

Just like the 16 year old, speeding along, was reminded of the fact that her father could be watching at any moment, we need to be reminded that our heavenly Father is always watching us. May we be ever-conscious of this as we live each moment.

Parenting 101: When They Grow Out of the Cute Stage

1 Comment / January 14, 2014 January 14, 2014

Somewhere in the neighborhood of six or seven our kids start losing all of that adorable “cuteness” and turn into ordinary kids. It is no longer cute if they bring in mud or talk disrespectfully. It’s just annoying. But, on a very bright side, they can now take their own showers and we get a full night’s sleep.

This was my favorite time of parenting. While I have loved each and every stage for different reasons, I would have to chalk this one up as my favorite so far. I homeschooled all of my kids through all (or most) of their elementary years and we had such a great time! We played games and read books and did projects. I scolded and cajoled. And sometimes I yelled. But we still had fun, despite the frustrating moments. Camping together as a family at this stage was especially rewarding. There would be loads of excitement about even the smallest activity. Few demands and lots of joy. It was a simple time.

But, while this is such a fun and less demanding stage (if you’ve done your work during the toddler stage, that is…), we can’t let down our guards. For now is the time to get them ready for those chaotic teen years just around the corner. And, by the way, if you haven’t done your homework in the toddler years, it’s not too late. Now is the time…before it is too late.

I am not sure we specifically planned them, but we did seven things during these years that I can see now prepared our family for the teen years. While there are some things I would change if I could do it all over again, I wouldn’t change these seven things–

1. We taught them God’s Word. I had a formal Bible time each morning in our home school and Eric had devotions and prayer time with them at bedtime each day. We wanted to foster a love in their hearts for God and to know and love His Word. We wanted them to know that their spiritual lives were important to us.

2. We talked about important topics in front of them. We talked about problems and struggles and biblical solutions. We spent dinner times and travel time and bedtimes talking about just about everything. Campfires were especially wonderful for this. Nothing was off-limits because we wanted them to know that we were here to answer their questions. If we didn’t have the answer we would hunt it down. We used God’s Word as our guide and our foundation. I believe this is how we developed the biblical world view that they each continue to hold to this day.

3. We laughed and played a lot. While we enjoyed many serious discussions, we also had lots of fun. I hope that our kids knew that we enjoyed being with them and that we valued them as an integral part of this family.

4. This was the stage where we started to require chores. We laugh now about my many efforts to organize this. Oh, the charts and graphs and beads and coins that went into trying to systematize chores! But I never gave up. I think it is so important that our kids start giving back to the family at this stage. It helps them understand the balance of work and play and also makes them feel like they are an important part of the family. And have them work alongside you while you fix the car or bake a cake, teaching them what you know. After all, your kids will work for the rest of their lives in one capacity or another. Now is the time to teach them a good work ethic and the skills they need to live a happy, productive life.

5. We spent some one-on-one time with each child. At this stage it is so much easier just to do things in a group. And that is important. But it’s also important to spend time alone with each child, getting to know them personally. And, while I know some families who set up special “dates” and outings, we accomplished this a bit more simply by letting the children take turns staying up later (they just loved watching their siblings go to bed while they snuggled on the sofa to read a story with mom!) or taking only one child to the grocery store. Even if you don’t have time to plan something, you can work one-on-one time into your schedule.

6. We tried not to overschedule. This is the time of life where we start feeling pressure to get our kids involved in sports and dance and music lessons and math club. And these are not bad things. But be sure to leave some time for them to be bored. For that is how they develop problem-solving skills and their creative side. If every moment is scheduled, they become dependent on their schedulers and list-makers, instead of learning to think for themselves. Our kids need some downtime. In our family we accomplished this by keeping activities to only one or two at a time (i.e. music lessons and soccer). We also had a daily quiet time in our homeschool where each child would spend an hour or so in their rooms, reading or playing quietly (which also functioned as my sanity keeper in the midst of those crazy years!)

7. And–maybe the most important thing at this stage– we listened. Most kids in this stage talk and talk. And talk. And then talk some more. My mom gave me some really good advice about this, which I’ve shared here on the blog before: “Listen now so they will talk to you later.” Oh, such wisdom. Now is the time to develop the good communication you will need as you head into the teen years. I have found her words to be true.

If you find yourself in this stage of parenting right now, I hope these seven things will help you as you prepare your kids to become teens and adults. These years will too soon be over, so try to appreciate each moment you have with these young treasures. I still feel an ache in my heart when I talk to kids sometimes, knowing that that part of my life is over.

And always keep in mind that the work you put into them now will reap immeasurable rewards later. Keep up the good work, my friend!

Parenting 101: What Does My Marriage Have To Do With It?

2 Comments / January 7, 2014 January 7, 2014

The little girl stared wide-eyed at her parents. The family was eating a dinner like any normal night. The mom had cooked a meal and when the dad had come home from work the family all took a seat at the table. But somewhere during the course of conversation that night, the mom and dad had started to argue. The argument had become quite heated and the little girl was scared. The big “D” word played over and over in her mind. She thought of some of her friends who lived with just their moms.

After dinner, she quietly left the table and hurried upstairs where she grabbed a small suitcase and started packing. She didn’t know what was going to happen but she knew she didn’t want to be around to watch it.

She didn’t get very far. Her parents found her and they all had a good talk.

That little girl was me. I do not remember much about my childhood but I do remember that evening. I was only a small girl — maybe six or seven. But seeing my mom and dad fight scared me to death. Thankfully, I was in a home where that was not a daily occurrence and when it was over, it was over. Genuine apologies were made and life moved on.

I tell you that story because I think it shows just a bit what our children think when we are struggling to get along as a couple. I can also remember when Eric and I went through a very difficult period for about a year early on in our marriage. No cause showed itself and eventually it just got better but, for whatever reason, we just couldn’t get along during that time. While we struggled, one of our children would get up every night with a bellyache. It wasn’t until later that we put two and two together and realized that the poor child’s fear of an impending divorce was showing up in her belly. Now, we knew we weren’t getting divorced– just as my parents knew they weren’t getting divorced when I heard them fighting– but she didn’t know that.

Can you see how critical it is that we make sure our kids know how much we love each other? That they understand that we will never, ever get divorced? But only if it’s true. Don’t lie to them. That will make things worse.

And, I might add here before moving on– I understand that some of you are married to uncooperative and ungodly spouses. I grieve with you over that. Keep praying. And may that motivate you to pray that your children would choose godly spouses as they grow up.

But for those of you who are married to a Christian spouse and really want a strong family with well-adjusted kids, be sure to keep your marriage a strong priority. I can think of three specific reasons–

1. It provides a security like no other for a child. The world can be in utter chaos, but if home is a safe and happy place, our children feel secure.

2. It provides consistency between mom and dad that is comforting and helpful to growing kids. Kids are smart and if they can play mom and dad against each other to get their own way, they will do it. Healthy marriages keep these games to a minimum.

3. It gives them a godly example of marriage to emulate in their own lives when that time comes. Children in homes with healthy marriages are much more likely to have their own healthy marriages. Whether we like it or not, most of us end up being just like our parents. We end up arguing like them, serving (or not serving) like them, going to church as often as them, and parenting like them. Oh, many of us make changes because we see the need, but our natural inclination is to be like our parents. With that in mind, it is important that we have a healthy marriage now so that our kids have a much better opportunity to have healthy homes of their own one day.

So, now that we understand how important it is, how do we go about doing that?

Most of us are familiar with the Ephesians 5:22-29 passage about a woman submitting to her husband and a man loving his wife. We women get very “up in arms” over that word submit. But should we? Of course, over the centuries, many misguided men have twisted that word to be synonymous with the word doormat. But is that what the Lord meant? I think not, given the exhortation for men to cherish their wives. Men who cherish their wives do not treat them like doormats.

Very simply, a healthy marriage consists of two people giving up their own selfish desires for the other person. Of course, as a believer, we should desire to think less of self in all relationships (Philippians 2:3-5), but this fruit of selflessness is never so sorely tried as in marriage. For in marriage, we cannot hide our selfish motives and unkind hearts. We can’t hide our sinful habits and our big mouths.

And, interestingly enough, I found out rather recently in my own marriage that when one of the marriage partners makes an effort in being kind and loving and unselfish instead of snappy and critical, oftentimes the other person will rise to meet them in that effort. And– just to be clear– it was my sweet husband who reminded me of what marriage can be by going above and beyond. His actions motivated me to meet him half-way in making our relationship so much healthier.

All marriages go through good times and difficult times. Meanwhile our kids are watching. And they sit back and wonder: Are they going to work it out or give up? Are they going to keep talking or ignore each other for days on end? Will they stay together or will they get divorced?

We need to live each marriage moment in light of being the husband or wife that God has called us to be. We need to be the same person at home that we are in public. We need to keep working and trying and giving up our rights and desires for the betterment of our spouse. And, while this is not easy to do as naturally selfish people, I try to remember when I’m frustrated that it’s really no picnic being married to me, either! Marriage is two imperfect people living together in an imperfect world. There are bound to be some rocky patches.

One final very important thing to remember is that love is not a feeling. Love is action. And when we choose to love by our actions, it is incredibly surprising and quite amazing how the feelings of love return. So choose to love and be amazed at God’s grace in this area. But I will warn you — this takes work. Work that is well worth it in the end, but it is work.

A healthy marriage is critical for a healthy family. That doesn’t mean there won’t be disagreements, but that we work through them in a way that honors our heavenly Father.

Thanks for reading! Hope you come back for the next post in this series which I’ve entitled Who’s the Boss? And if you liked this post, would you consider sharing it? Thank you! :)

Looking Back and Looking Forward

4 Comments / December 31, 2013 January 1, 2016

As another year draws to a close, I inevitably start looking to the new year. Budgets are again created for our household and business. I come up with personal goals having to do with my health, my home, and my walk with God. I suppose I am not alone in this past time. Many of us use this time to look forward and set goals. And while we don’t always get very far on our goals, budgets, and plans to lose weight, it is very important that we keep trying and working and praying. We can’t just give up.

One of the best starts to next year is first taking a few moments to reflect on last year. And so I decided to ask myself a few questions–

Am I closer to the Lord now than I was last year at this time?

What did I do that matters for eternity this past year?

Do I look more like Jesus right now than I did one year ago? Five years ago? Twenty years ago?

You may think I am a little obsessed with the spiritual side of things and I guess you would be right. As I get older, I can’t help but realize that it is really the only thing — long-term– that matters. And, quite honestly, out of my good spiritual health flows other good things–better relationships, self-control, joy.

But we can never manipulate God. And so it can never be our desire to have good spiritual health so that we can get what we want out of life. There is such a push to fulfill ourselves and find our purpose that we can sometimes forget that our purpose is to glorify God. As a believer, my desire is to please Him, not myself.

This takes me back to my goals for the new year. Am I creating these goals for me? Or do I have pleasing God in mind?

I can honestly say that –while there is an element of selfishness in them — more and more I become acutely aware of the fact that lack of self-control is a sin. And this is the main reason why I don’t stop trying to lose weight, to stick to a budget, and to stop wasting time.

God has given me (and you) some incredible resources. The three I specifically think of are our body, our time, and our money. If we don’t intentionally care for these resources they can be frittered away into nothingness (or in the case of our bodies — be enlarged into a great something!)

And this has been my experience on more occasions than I care to admit. And so I keep setting goals. But I try to set them in light of my spiritual health.

Because I want to serve and honor Jesus in this new year. And I cannot do that if I am lacking self-control in my life.

I know lots of people have given up on setting “New Year’s Resolutions”. But I want to encourage you to take a few minutes today for reflection. The new year is a great time to reflect on the past year and to set hopeful goals for the new year. But let’s set those goals with the Lord in mind. And let’s remember that Jesus is by our side as we fight against the sin and bad habits that so easily beset us, ready to strengthen and help us.

Isaiah 41:10

I Corinthians 10:13

2 Corinthians 12:9-10

Psalm 46:1

Just Believe

2 Comments / December 23, 2013 December 23, 2013

This time of year, you hear (and see) the words just believe a lot. Most times it is referring to Santa Claus. But, other times, it is referring to believing in God or in angels. Or something supernatural. Something outside of normal human happenings.

Sometimes these words are followed by the words “in yourself”. Just believe in yourself. Sometimes they are followed with a Bible verse.

The key is believing. It doesn’t seem to really matter these days what you believe, as long as you believe.

The problem lies in the fact that, outside of God’s Word, whatever you believe in seems to consistently change.

Believe in myself?

One day I am strong and courageous and, the next, I am frightened and weak.

Believe in the media?

One day they say vitamins and supplements are critical to a healthy lifestyle, the next they say they cause cancer (yes, I actually just read an article that states this!)

Believe in Santa Claus?

That works until you are about six and can make sense of the fact that, no matter how many times your parents take you to see Santa Claus or how many Christmas movies show Santa weaving Christmas miracles, there is no possible way a big fat man could get down the chimney or visit all those houses on Christmas Eve.

Believe in God?

Of course we believe in God (most of us). But what does that mean? How do we know what to believe? If it is up to me to define who God is, I will make Him into someone I want Him to be. But what if that isn’t who He is? How do I know the Truth about God?

Believe in Jesus?

Which Jesus? The Jesus that the world is preaching– the non-judging, weak Jesus? The one who accepts everyone without condition–no repentance of sin necessary?

It is a confusing world we live in. One day we read one thing and the next we read the opposite. It makes me feel like burying my head in the sand and shouting, “I give up!” Or at least it would, if it wasn’t for one thing–

God’s Word.

For there, and only there, can we truly understand who God is and why Jesus came. Only there does the world and the direction it is going make any sense at all. Only there do we learn fully of God’s plan for His people.

Sure, there are some things that make me uncomfortable in that book. I am hit face to face with my sin there– For the word of God is living and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even to the division of soul and spirit, and of joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.( Hebrews 4:12)

But I would rather know the truth–about myself, about God, and about the world–than live in a made-up world built of sand.

And so, as we celebrate this Christmas season, I am so very thankful to say that I know what I believe without a shadow of a doubt. I know that God’s Word is Truth, no matter what the rest of the world says. I know that the baby in the manger was born to die–to pay the price for my sins. I know that Jesus lives victorious over sin!

And that foundation is priceless, as we try to discern and process all that is going on around us–in the modern day church, in politics, in our own lives–in fact, in any and all areas.

p.s. If you want to truly understand just how awesome God’s Word is and how it got to us, this sermon is the most wonderful one I have heard on the subject. It was very helpful in reminding me of the reliability and inerrancy and power of God’s Word. I wish every Christian would listen to it.

What We Remember

2 Comments / December 19, 2013 December 19, 2013

Christmas is such a blessed time, especially if we truly understand the reason for the season. But, inevitably, as we grow older this time of year also comes with a bit of sad nostalgia as we remember favorite childhood memories and loved ones no longer with us.

Sometimes I am so caught up in the busyness of the season, I don’t really take the time to reflect on past Christmases, but this season has purposefully been a little slower paced and so I found my mind going back–

One of my favorite Christmas memories was making homemade Christmas ornaments with my mom and brother. Sometimes my grandmother, aunt, and cousins would join us. Sometimes we would make them on Thanksgiving Day. We would play Christmas music and cut and paint and glue and glitter. We would watch colorful plastic shrink in the oven until it became a quarter of its original size (anyone else remember the wonder of shrinky-dinks?) I especially remember the felt ornaments we tried one year. There was the Christmas tree with the rick-rack garland and the ornament shape with glued sequins and ribbon decorating it. I am pretty sure my mom still hangs some of these handmade ornaments each year on her tree.

I remember coloring with my brother. Every year we would buy the same matching Christmas coloring books. Its pages held a story about a girl and a boy and Santa. We would lay on the floor on the brightly-colored blue, red, green, and gold afghan my grandmother had crocheted, listening to Alvin and the Chipmunks while we colored in our coloring books with a brand new box of Crayola crayons. I always colored the girl’s hair a golden yellow.

I also remember my very favorite song called Christmas Chopsticks sang by Bobby Vinton on my very favorite Christmas album called a Very Merry Christmas. I think it was an album put out by a hardware store. Remember those? I used to play that record over and over again. Jim Nabors (i.e. Gomer Pyle) sang a song on the album in a deep bass voice. It was nothing like his Gomer Pyle voice at all.

And one of my fondest memories is spinning around in circles to Christmas music. My brother and I would try to stay on the blanket (yes, the same brightly colored afghan) and twirl and twirl until we got dizzy and we fell down. If any part of our bodies left the blanket we would be the loser. It was a made up game we loved. We did that every Christmas for years.

I remember my dad taking forever to get ready on Christmas morning. We kids would sit there in anxious anticipation, lining up our presents in the order we would want to open them. And then re-lining them up again. We would shake them and stare at them, trying to guess what was in each brightly colored package. And then we would re-line them again. After what seemed like an eternity, my dad would slowly walk down the steps, smiling. It was just part of our family’s tradition and we loved it!

And I remember my uncle Dave, pretending to be Santa and the excitement and expectation of him walking through the door– even though I knew he wasn’t really Santa. I remember family gathering, and laughing, and playing games, enjoying one another’s company. I remember mounds and mounds of yummy Pennsylvania Dutch food. We were not a gourmet family by any sense of the word and the foods that were prepared would make any healthy eater shudder, but I still, to this day, enjoy a good carbohydrate-laden holiday meal.

You know what I don’t remember?

I don’t remember any of my gifts. Oh, wait–I take that back. There was one Christmas that I wanted my own phone “real bad”. Back then, of course, that meant running wires and putting in another line. My mom thought it would be funny to put a play phone in a box and wrap it up. I still vividly remember opening that blue play phone with its rotary dial. I actually didn’t think it was that funny.

But I don’t remember many other gifts. It wasn’t that I didn’t get gifts. My mom loves Christmas and we were never disappointed (except for that phone incident!) But now I can see that the gifts weren’t really what was important about Christmas.

For Christmas is most importantly about Jesus coming to earth as a babe to save the lost. It’s about God sending His Son into this fallen, sinful world to grow up to be a man and then die on a cross for sinners. It’s about that Son rising again with victory over sin and death. Christmas is a big part of the plan of salvation, that is available to all people, through God’s grace and mercy.

But Christmastime is also about family coming together, forgetting for a brief time the cares and problems that keep us apart. Christmas is about spending time together, making memories and loving one another. I didn’t have a perfect family. My mom’s family was not perfect and neither was my dad’s. There were serious issues going on in my extended families, unbeknownst to me at the time. But I am so thankful for family members who could enjoy one another’s company for a few hours each holiday season to make beautiful memories for the child that was me. What a blessing.

As we look at our Christmas gift list for the tenth time this year, stressing over all we still have to buy, let us remember that Christmas isn’t really about the gifts under the tree, after all.

Let’s try to bring joy and hope to our family gatherings this year. Let’s not discuss topics that will start arguments. Let’s ignore the sharp tongue of that critical family member. Let’s overlook the faults of another for this short time. Let’s act and react with grace and kindness. Let’s give our families the gift of peace.

Let’s plan some fun activities — making ornaments, completing a Christmas puzzle, reading a Christmas story, watching A Christmas Carol, picking out a tree– anything that will make great memories and strengthen our family relationships. Let’s give our families the gift of happy memories.

And let’s focus on what matters. Let’s be sure our children know why we celebrate Christmas. Let’s keep Christ at the center of it all. Let’s strive to please our Lord and Savior all through the year. Let’s give our families the gift of a life lived for Jesus.

Candy Crush Madness

2 Comments / December 15, 2013 December 15, 2013

It all started with an innocent question asked by a friend.

“Do you play Candy Crush?”

I don’t like to waste a lot of time playing iPad games, but I do enjoy a half hour in the evening to wind down and I was in need of something new and fresh. I thought I’d check into it.

At first, I sailed through the levels, enjoying the challenge of moving the little candies into rows of three. It reminded me of the original Bejeweled game, which I loved and no longer exists (to my knowledge). And so, about a week ago, Candy Crush became my game of choice.

As I moved up in levels, it became increasingly harder to pass. And if you failed so many times, a message would pop up, telling you that you would have to wait for so many minutes before playing again.

But, lo and behold, this could be avoided by paying for extra lives. Or extra treats to help beat the levels. Only $.99.

Now, I like to play games but I’ll be darned if I am paying anything to beat a level. That seems almost dumber than gambling. At least in gambling there is a slight chance to come away with more than what you put in. Apparently there are plenty of people who do pay, however. A website claims that Candy Crush makers rake in almost a million per day from people who pay to play.

So, if I wasn’t going to pay, how was I going to beat this thing? Well, at first I figured out that if I changed the date on my iPad, I could continue playing. It would fool the game into thinking that my “Life” stash was full again. Great. Now I could just play.

But, alas, I got to a very, very difficult level. I just kept playing and playing the same board, all the while telling myself how utterly ridiculous I was to waste time on this. But, finally, I passed that level and then went onto the next level. I passed that one after only a few tries.

And then I got to one that truly appeared impossible.

I kept playing and playing and the screen, offering the little treats for only $.99 became more and more appealing. Just once wouldn’t hurt, right?

Failed again.

Surely, I can get this. I continued to waste time trying to beat a level that I am still not sure it was even possible to beat without paying anything.

And then I realized something.

I had been fully sucked in. And I decided to escape while I still could. (How in the world would I explain Candy Crush charges to my husband??)

And, so I exited the game, deleted it from my iPad, and chose to move on with a more productive use of my time.

But my time spent on that game showed me one thing.

It showed me just how we get sucked in to sinful habits.

You see, at first it doesn’t cost much. There is a great deal of satisfaction and no payment–

~One cocktail or beer relaxes us and helps with our conversation skills.

~A few minutes looking or listening or thinking about something ungodly doesn’t seem to hurt a thing and gratifies something fleshly inside of us.

~A few minutes at a gaming table is all great fun.

~An evening spent playing video games is a fun evening with friends.

~Eating a pastry that is loaded with calories just melts in your mouth.

That first taste doesn’t cost us anything and the rewards are great. But, if we aren’t careful–if we aren’t self-controlled–we can get caught up in the rewards and we need more and more to yield the same feelings of satisfaction. That is what addiction is and it can happen with almost anything.

I think it is clear that there isn’t any sin in having a drink or a delicious pastry. There is no sin in spending the evening playing video games (if it is a video game that is not dishonoring to God in any way). But if we become compelled to have more and more, we will get caught in a web that becomes almost impossible to escape from.

Self-Control. A highly under-rated character trait that has almost disappeared from our world. I can tell you that it is one that I struggle with daily.

But if we don’t cultivate self-control in our lives–if we aren’t even aware of the battle– we will, at the very least, end up wasting our time on unimportant, trivial things, or, at the worst, end up destroying our family, our health, or our very lives.

And, so it is good-bye to Candy Crush for me. It is so not worth it. Glad I found out before I wasted too many of the few precious hours that make up my life. Now…to apply that same philosophy to a few other areas of my life that need some work!

The Missing Piece

6 Comments / December 8, 2013 December 8, 2013

So I realized something today. One of the reasons I have felt so uninspired in my blog post writing recently is because I have been so worried about offending people. I think I was, unconsiously, trying to gain a bigger readership and found myself avoiding subjects that would cause Christians to squirm. You see, I had become aware of the fact that my most popular posts were/are the “feel good” posts. The posts about God working and providing. The posts about love. The posts about missions and outreach and caring for others.

And don’t get me wrong. Those posts are important. But that is only half of the Christian life. And sometimes we have to hear the hard stuff.

And one of those hard things is something that, seemingly, no Christian wants to even talk about. It’s so much a part of our way of life these days that this has become a non-issue for many believers. And yet it is rendering many of us completely ineffective in our witnesses to the world.

So what is it?

Let me give you a hint: the main river of this flows from Hollywood.

Yep. You guessed it. It is what the world calls “Entertainment”.

The problem here isn’t really what the world is entertained by. Obviously, the world is not living by the same book we are.

No, the great worry for me is that Christians are watching it, enjoying it, and, even worse yet, not seeing anything wrong with it.

How incredibly grieved God must be.

This post is the result of a conversation I had with one of my children regarding a recent gathering she had with her friends. I do not want to give details because it is not my information to offer, but suffice it to say that these kids who are filling their heads with garbage are now starting to live it and see nothing wrong with it.

You think that filling your mind with pictures of adultery and fornication and naked, writhing bodies doesn’t affect you? You think seeing people shoot another human without blinking doesn’t affect you? You think that hearing God’s name in vain and the F-word a thousand times in one film doesn’t affect you?

Well, I think you’re naive.

It does affect you. I know this because of how hardened the hearts of Christians have become to sin, as evidenced by this group of “Christian” young people who have now started acting upon what they see and thinking it is all a big joke.

And my question is WHY? Why is this even a conversation among Christians? Why is the choice to practice discernment in this area so abnormal? Why do Christians get so much flack and criticism from other Christians when they choose to practice purity in this area of their lives?

We know FOR A FACT that God hates all sexual sin (I Corinthians 6:18), violence (Psalm 11:5), coarse and crude language, lying (Colossians 3:6-9), drunkenness, and witchcraft of any type (Galatians 5:19-21).

And, yet, on any given evening, many Christians are watching shows and movies that not only contain these things that grieve the heart of God, but are filled with them.

Oh, some of the plots are good — I’ll give you that. Satan is not stupid. Of course, they have to be good. It helps to draw you in. But is a good plot worth the sacrifice of grieving our heavenly father?

It’s just not.

So, I guess my question is this: How much do we really love God?

Do we love Him enough to sacrifice our favorite TV show?

Do we love Him enough to say no to a movie, even though all of our friends are going?

Do we love Him enough to pass by that very popular video game that is all about violence or that bestseller that is based on the principles of witchcraft?

Does our love run that deep for our Savior?

Yes, true Christianity is about love and caring for the needy. But it’s also about being different. It’s about being a light in a very, very dark world.

Maybe our addiction to worldly entertainment is the thing that has kept us from a close walk with the Lord. Maybe our decision to “join in the fun” drinking, partying, and living it up is what’s keeping our friend from knowing Jesus and having eternal life. Maybe our choice to fill our minds with things that grieve our God is the missing piece of the puzzle that keeps us from peace and joy in the Christian life.

Please, this is too important to ignore or to shrug off. If Satan can render you ineffective he has done his job. Don’t let that happen!