Encouragement – Page 26 – Growing 4 Life

Alone in the Store

2 Comments / July 21, 2014 July 21, 2014

The actual rainbow I saw as I came out of the store

The sky grew darker and darker. Billows of black clouds rolled above my head. I couldn’t believe it wasn’t raining yet. I nervously drove towards the grocery store, wishing I had just stayed home. (I am pretty sure that the tornado that ripped through the development just down the road almost ten years ago is still affecting my nerves when the sky grows dark!) But I was almost there already, so I wasn’t going back home now.

The leaden sky and heaviness in the air made it very clear that the storm was approaching quickly and I saw people scurrying around as I got out of my car. I asked myself again: What exactly am I doing out in this?

I grabbed a cart and decided that I was probably going to need to wait this out in the store. I really wanted to be at home, but I wasn’t and so I decided I just needed to make the best of it.

Just as I went inside and made my way to the produce aisle, I heard the deluge begin on the roof above me. The fact that the wind and rain could be heard so loudly inside a building with hardly any windows was actually a little scary. But I continued to shop.

The store at this time was abuzz with activity. Lots of people traveling hurriedly among the aisles and cashiers busily checking out customers. But about ten minutes later, I realized something. I was the only customer. Well, maybe not the only one, but I didn’t see another one as I traveled the aisles and the store had grown deadly silent aside from a few excited store employees moving about as they discussed a leak in the back of the store.

What was I missing?

Why had everyone gone out in the pouring rain instead of waiting it out in the store? I have to confess that about that time I started wondering if there was a tornado warning or something that I should know about. I called my daughter and texted my husband. All was okay at home. I breathed a sigh of relief. And then I started imagining the shelves caving in on me when the dreaded tornado blew through (it’s one of the downfalls of being a writer–this vivid imagination!) My eyes started searching the store — where would I be the safest? And then I just laughed at myself. There certainly wasn’t much I could do about it, so I just kept shopping, taking my good old time, because I certainly wasn’t going to venture outside in such weather. (A few days later I found out that there was indeed a tornado warning!)

About the time I was ready to check-out, I heard one of the cashiers exclaim to her co-worker, “It looks like the sun is out!” And then, “there’s a rainbow!”

I breathed a sigh of relief and checked out as hurriedly as I could. I had spent enough time in the grocery store for one day!

As I pushed my cart outside, there was indeed a rainbow, vivid in its colors, along with a fainter, second rainbow just above it. It was beautiful!

I can’t help but relate this experience to how I feel as a biblical Christian in the current culture. The storm is upon us and with each new heresy, tons of Christians are jumping ship–

There’s no hell? Yes, I like that idea. And there goes several thousand.

You can be gay and be a Christian, too? Yes, that satisfies my flesh and my thinking just fine. And there goes several thousand more.

Christianity is based more on my experience and how I feel than on what God’s Word says? Oh that feels real good. And off go a great big bunch.

God didn’t create the world in seven literal days? Well, whatever the secular scientists say must be right. And we lose many more.

You only have to say a prayer asking Jesus into your heart and then can continue to live however you want? Heaven and my flesh, too? Perfect. And there goes several hundred thousand.

Until those of us who are adhering and obeying God’s Word in its totality feel completely and utterly alone in the “store” wondering if we are missing something? Of course, many who are jumping ship were never believers in the first place, but what puzzles most of us is why fellow believers are venturing out into such a relentless and severe storm of demoralizing confusion? Is there something we don’t know?

I think what we do know is that, in the end, many will be deceived. Many will lose their love for truth and instead want their ears tickled with pleasing fancies and fables (2 Thessalonians 2:10-12; 2 Timothy 4:3-4; Matthew 24:24).

But I am committed to “staying in the store” no matter what weather blows outside because I am safest there (Psalm 91:1-3). Would you consider staying here with me? Let’s be the ones that stick together until the end — loving God more than we love ourselves, desiring to please, obey, and glorify Him alone.

There is still a precious remnant who wants to honor the Lord and obey His whole Word. There are still some of us who are sticking to the traditional faith, where whole-hearted repentance of sin, faith in Christ alone for salvation, and a transformed life because of this faith are the defining signs of a genuine believer. There are still a few of us who adhere to the Bible as the literal and inerrant Word of God. We are not alone. Let’s weather the storm together, knowing that when it’s over our reward will be far greater than a beautiful rainbow (James 1:12; I Corinthians 2:9; Romans 8:18).

What a Smile Can Do

Leave a Comment / July 13, 2014 July 14, 2014

Going to a new place where you know few people is never easy. Fitting in at a new church can be especially hard. Finding myself in this position last summer, I finally made a decision to help with the children’s ministry on a weekly basis so that I could possibly get to know a few people. And, happily, this did help me feel much less like a stranger when I walked in the church doors every Sunday morning. But little did I know that one of the best things that would result from my weekly service would be my acquaintance with one of the little guys I saw every week.

This little boy, for whatever reason, started giving me a giant “hi!” and a big hug whenever he would see me. He would smile so brightly at me and it would make me feel so much better– no matter what mood I was in. This started many months ago and continues even now when I see him on Sundays, even though we are taking a summer break. Needless to say, he has certainly taken a special place in my heart.

Now, I don’t really know him and he doesn’t really know me, but can I even begin to tell you the warmth that fills my heart when he smiles at me? His smile says to me, “I think you are special!” and his hug says, “I like you!”

You see, he’s a little boy, so I know there are no social mores or hidden agendas behind his smile. I know that his hugs are genuine and his smiles from his heart.

What happens to us as we get older? We may smile, but it often doesn’t reach our eyes. We may even offer hugs, but they are often born out of a sense of duty. Why can’t we freely give smiles and hugs like little children? Why do we have to grow out of this delightful habit?

It’s probably because life teaches us some pretty difficult lessons and we learn that we can’t trust everybody. We become skeptics. We build walls and put on our armor and then cover it all up with a fake smile.

But thinking about this sweet boy who has brought joy to me in such a simple way has made me realize that I, too, can bring joy to others simply by giving them a genuine smile — and even a hug, if the situation is appropriate– making them feel important and loved.

You see, it doesn’t really take money or fame or wisdom or stuff to impress most people. No, most people just want to be loved.

And a genuine smile is a great start to showing that we truly care about others.

As I write, one final thought comes to mind — perhaps we should start giving some genuine smiles to our immediate family members. So often we save our best smiles for friends and acquaintances. Let’s try this week to show our families that we are genuinely glad to see them. What a simple–but effective– way to add some joy to our homes this week.

Are you ready to smile with me this week?

The Illusion of Permanent Happiness

8 Comments / July 10, 2014 August 31, 2024

We hadn’t seen the girl for a long time. We knew her like we know our postman. Barely. But enough to smile and say Hi. I didn’t even know her name.

She referred to her husband in the past tense in the course of our conversation. Which made us wonder. Was everything okay?

Turns out everything wasn’t okay.

Unbeknownst to me, my small question had just opened the door for a very interesting conversation.

She shared about how she and her husband had never really felt anything for each other. They had just dated as kids and after you date you get married. She realized that they had really only been just friends more than anything else and she decided after a few years that this wasn’t the way she wanted to live the rest of her life. There was no enmity, no arguing–but there wasn’t any love, either.

I got the distinct impression that this was more about her not feeling love than him not feeling love. She went on to share that her choice had left him broken-hearted and devastated. She truly felt bad for him, but not that bad. The separation had recently become final with that ugly word divorce.

It all made complete sense. If you have the world view that your happiness is your first priority then it made complete and absolute sense. I don’t fault her. She is just living out what all of us have been taught for at least the last 30–if not 40– years: Our personal happiness is the most important thing in the world.

Disney has been telling us to follow our hearts since its inception and many voices have joined the chorus, crying out that we cannot possibly be all that we were meant to be if we aren’t happy. Many marriages, children, parents, friendships, and other relationships have been sacrificed on the altar of personal happiness.

But there is an intrinsic problem with this world view: We are searching for something that can’t be found. Even if we had more money, a better body, or the perfect marriage, we wouldn’t be happy. Not for long because happiness cannot be found in circumstances. Even when we think we have found it for a year or two, it is so elusive, that as soon as we think we have grabbed a hold of it permanently, it disappears again and we are left empty-handed or frustrated, continuing our search elsewhere.

No, true happiness isn’t to be found in changing our circumstances, but instead it is found in fixing our eyes on Jesus and submitting ourselves to God’s plan for our lives. True happiness is found in obedience to God’s Word. (Psalm 37:4, Proverbs 16:20, Proverbs 28:14, and almost all of Psalm 119)

The time wasn’t right, but I so wanted to share with her that God can fill her heart with love — deep and abiding love– for her husband. I wanted to tell her that Jesus isn’t just a name or some historical figure that people talk about but that He’s real and is making a real difference in my life and many other lives of true believers. That He has radically saved and changed me. And my husband. And our kids. I mostly wanted to tell her that He can radically save and change her.

But after she had told us about what had been going on in her life, we were out of time and we had to head different directions. And so I had to walk away from that conversation rather dissatisfied at the outcome. Thinking I could have done better. Said something wiser. But, alas, the opportunity was over.

But we left realizing that the world view that most of us have taken to heart is an outright lie from the pit of hell. And, lest we Christians become a little “uppity” here at this point, think for just a moment about how important your happiness is in your own life. Oh, we may not walk away from a marriage or do anything so drastic, but this quest for personal happiness plays itself out in millions of small ways every day, causing arguments, strife, and heartache. You see, whether we are Christians or not, when we fall for this lie– when we make our own happiness our most important priority– we not only end up bringing disappointment and turmoil to our own lives, but to many lives around us, as well. And we all fall for it sometimes. Hopefully, less and less as we mature in the faith.

May we find our happiness and joy in Jesus, delighting in and obeying His Word and submitting to His will for our lives. Only then are we be able to say that we are truly happy…at least until the next time we find ourselves focusing on ourselves yet again–it’s such a cycle. Permanent and everlasting happiness and joy will come but not until we are with our loving Savior in our eternal home.

Removing the Junk

2 Comments / July 7, 2014 July 7, 2014

I have a feeling my husband might be a little upset with me today. Well, let me begin at the beginning.

I have spent the last year or so on a very slow and arduous journey. It has taken me to the highest mountain and to the lowest valley. I have felt the exhilaration of success and the sting of defeat.

Most of you know I am not an athlete, so you probably are wondering what in the world I am talking about?

It’s called Weight Loss.

Ugh.

Can anyone relate? My journey is so slow that when I went to the doctor in April, I had lost only 18 pounds in one year. But, as I figure it, that is 18 pounds less than I weighed a year ago. That is 18 less pounds that do not need to be carried by my bad knees. 18 less pounds of fat surrounding and impeding my internal organs. 18 less pounds. I consider that somewhat of a success. At least for someone who can’t run anymore.

I do have lots to share about the past year. If you are discouraged in your weight loss journey by physical limitations or simply hopelessness, please contact me privately. I am not ready to share anything publicly yet, as I have such a long way to go.

But, on to why my husband may be upset with me…

So my doctor’s visit in April was a wonderful success and then I let my guard down. Everything was crazy busy with the wedding, I was doing great, and…

I got lazy.

This morning I stepped on the scales with great trepidation. And, rightly so. I had gained several of those pounds back.

I thought over the last few weeks and realized that there was a good reason I was seeing that number on the scales. I had completely left my guard down and had brought junk food back into my home. It’s also ice cream season and I have a hard time resisting ice cream. I had grown apathetic and had not exercised as regularly as I should.

The funny thing is that all of this bad stewardship of my body wasn’t making me feel better in any way. Nope. All that extra sugar and fat was making me feel lethargic and gross.

As I was thinking about that this morning, I decided that today is a new day! I am going to feed my body well. But I was also fully aware that as I progress through the day, this bright morning resolution was likely to dim considerably as the ice cream would start calling my name from the depths of the freezer.

Something drastic had to be done.

And so I gathered the container of Chocolate Peanut Butter ice cream that I can’t resist and the half-eaten bags of Dieffenbach’s chips and threw them away.

You see, I know what I can and cannot resist and those two things were making it difficult for me to continue on my path to health and wellness. Enough is enough and they had to be removed. Now, my husband does not like when I throw away food. Do you think it is okay if, in this one instance, I went ahead and did it, anyway? I think so, since I am pretty sure me being healthy is more important than a few dollars wasted.

The ridiculous thing is that when I bought these items at the grocery store, I knew full well that they would be difficult for me to eat in moderation. And so a wise person wouldn’t have purchased them in the first place. But I had this insatiable desire for sugar and salt and decided to completely ignore the voice in my head that told me to walk by them in the store.

Our spiritual lives are so similar, aren’t they? We know full well what sins we can or cannot resist. And yet we flirt with them, thinking somehow that we won’t reap the sorry consequences of our choices. But a spiritual diet of all junk food is just as devastating to our spiritual health. For we always reap the consequences of our actions. I can’t eat a regular diet of junk food without reaping the consequences of extra weight. It’s the same in the spiritual realm.

And so we need to carefully think about what we are allowing in our lives and discard anything that is keeping us from being the healthiest we can be spiritually.

And, just like eating a good, balanced diet helps me to feel so much better and be my most healthiest self, so feeding ourselves biblical truth through Bible study, solid preaching, and books that help us understand scripture correctly helps us to be our healthiest spiritual self.

And so let’s think about our lives. What do we need to discard today? What is keeping us from growing like we could be? Perhaps it’s a favorite tv show or an addiction to movies (get rid of cable)? Or an insatiable desire to buy stuff (cut up your credit cards)? We all struggle with different things. But we all struggle. Let’s be fully conscious of the things that are keeping us from being the healthiest we can be–in all areas of our lives!

Never Lost

Leave a Comment / June 19, 2014 June 19, 2014

I reached down into my pocket and felt nothing. Just to be sure I patted both pockets to make sure nothing was hiding in there. Nope.

Okay, so I must have laid it down. I started looking on all of the surfaces around me. Nothing.

I started looking underneath the chair I had been sitting on. And then lifted the cushion and ran my hands down the side cracks of the chair. I found a few other things, but not what I was looking for.

Where could I have left it?

The car!

I sometimes do leave my phone in the car, so I walked outside with a renewed sense of hope. I looked in the cupholder–it’s usual home in my car– to no avail. I looked beneath and between the seats. I looked outside the car on the ground. It was nowhere to be found.

I walked back into the house, now growing a bit frustrated–and a little panicky, if I’m honest. At this point, I am wondering if somehow it was stolen or was permanently lost. (I am also thinking about how I have become far too dependent on my phone–but that’s another story for another day).

As I rush around, my youngest daughter realizes that she, too, cannot find her phone. We are like two crazy people searching the house madly.

My other daughter gave a half-hearted effort to help us and then, a few minutes into it, said, “Have you tried ‘Find My iPhone’?”

Of course! Why didn’t I think of that?

I plugged my info into my iPad and there it came– up on the satellite. My iPhone was definitely somewhere on our property. It looked like it was outside somewhere. So now what?

I noticed the option to have my phone play a sound. That could help. I pressed the button and then listened. Nothing.

I walked towards the car because that is where I had last remembered having my phone. And, suddenly, I heard a wonderful, and yet annoying, sound coming from my car. So it was in the car. I opened the door and started looking around again, this time with certainty that what I was searching for would be found.

And there it was! It had slid underneath the center console and I hadn’t even thought to look there. Sometimes…

Meanwhile, in another part of the house, my daughters were finding the other lost iPhone, using the same method. That phone had become lost in the recesses of the new leather chair (by the way, yes, that’s the chair that I wrote about last week. We put it in the family room and I am now happily back in my old chair!)

You know…

We are kind of like iPhones. Stay with me here.

We can never really get lost.

Oh, we can be alone, somewhere far away, not knowing anyone, but we are never lost to God. He always knows where we are and nothing can separate us from His love and care (Romans 8:38-39).

We can be in our own homes, surrounded by loved ones and yet feeling so lost and lonely it hurts. But God knows and walks with us in those times (Isaiah 43:2).

He won’t leave us or forsake us (Hebrews 13:5).

God always knows where we are, even if we don’t always know ourselves!

I guess God can use even a lost iPhone to remind us of His precious promises.

The Messy Middle

Leave a Comment / June 17, 2014 June 17, 2014

Before I even begin this post I may as well just make a confession.

I do not excel at cleaning my house.

You know how you go into some homes and everything is so spotless that you don’t even have to look into the closets to just know that they are probably organized by color and size? The fact that you could eat from the floor gives pretty solid proof that their pantries probably do not hold any old boxes of crackers, a bag of chips with just a few crumbs remaining, or empty tasty-cake boxes?

Anyway, that’s not my house.

I am just not one of those women who is checking my pantry every day for empty boxes. I am not one of those women who is cleaning out my cabinets every week…er…month…or even year?? I confess, I just believe there are so many other important things to do!

If you are one of those women who keeps a really neat house, then your family is blessed! Many have been the–shall we call them discussions?– regarding my method of housecleaning. Now, I do want you to understand that I do not keep a hovel. My house is basically clutter-free and clean–at least the areas that you can see when you visit!

BUT if you look into any given cabinet or closet…well, just don’t do it, okay? It may be dangerous. I try to stay after them. I really do. But–like I said– there are so many other things to do and, with six “not-so-tidy” people living here, well, they quickly become disorganized again, anyway.

But yesterday, I decided to tackle my family room. I don’t think I had actually thoroughly cleaned the cabinets in that room for several years. They were therefore unusable. I had a basic idea what was in there, but knew I would probably find a few surprises, too. I also decided to change the furniture around to make for more seating and to clean out a few other baskets.

The messy middle came about 30 minutes into the project. This was exactly why I didn’t want to start in the first place! And why I had put it off for so long.

So. Much. Stuff.

What is this? What if I give this away and then I need it again later? What in the world does this cord belong to? Where is the case for this dvd? Why do we even have this dvd? If I haven’t read this magazine from last year, I wonder if I ever will?

While I was in the midst of all that clutter and stuff, which was spread all over my kitchen table and family room floor, one of the kids came in.

“Wow, this is a mess.”

Yes, I know. Thanks for telling me.

Another one came in.

“Whoa! What are you doing?”

?? Really? I thought it was obvious.

I started to get discouraged and overwhelmed. I would escape to my computer every 15 minutes or so to check e-mail and Facebook. Anything to escape the dreariness of what lay ahead. I did not want to finish this job. But it had to be done. For goodness’ sake, we couldn’t even eat a family meal until this job was finished.

And so, I finally made myself sit and work without any escape. I forced myself to finish the big job I had undertaken, even though I didn’t really feel like it.

After it was all done, I looked over my rearranged and clean family room with the satisfaction of a job well-done. It was so miserable in the middle, but the end result made it so worth it!

Oh, how true this is in so many areas of life! Raising kids can get very messy in the middle, can it not? Marriages can get pretty messy, too. As can extended family relationships, church situations, and job situations.

Oftentimes, we warily stand back, so fearful to address an issue. Sometimes we are just lazy. And sometimes we are just too busy. We just figure it will have to go away sometime. And, very occasionally, that does happen.

But, just like my messy cabinets weren’t going to disappear, most problems aren’t going anywhere, either. And just like the cabinets grew worse– more layers of dust, more stuff, more disorganization, so do our problems grow bigger and deeper. And so we need to face them head on and deal with them. And, YES, dealing with it will be messy and unpleasant and hard work. But we can’t give up in the middle. We have to keep going so that we can get to the other side.

And when we do, we will feel a peace and satisfaction that is comparable to little else this world has to offer.

The messy middle is no fun. That’s the truth, plain and simple. But the results are so worth it.

And now you know far more about me and my house-cleaning practices than I wish you did but don’t let it be said that I’m not willing to sacrifice my reputation for the Lord ;)

A Look Back

3 Comments / May 16, 2014 May 16, 2014

In just a few short weeks my oldest daughter will be getting married. My dining room is filled with boxes and wedding supplies as she prepares for her big day. She and her fiance are busy fixing up an old house they were able to purchase. It is fun to watch them together, as they work on wedding plans and prepare to start their new life together. But it is also frustrating because my daughter lives here and her stuff is here, but she isn’t really here. Know what I mean?

And I wondered how I felt the summer before my August wedding? Was I as in love? Were my parents frustrated with me?

But I didn’t have to just wonder. I could actually look back. Because, as you may already know, most writers journal. And so I have some kind of record of my feelings about life since about 5th grade. I have pulled out those journals every great once in awhile as I have raised my teen girls.

So a few nights ago I decided to pull out my journal from the summer of 1988. I had not read those words since I had written them. It was strange to read the words of my former self. I am the same person. And yet, I am not the same person.

In those pages, I read about events and relationship dynamics that I had totally forgotten. And guess what? I had some of the typical problems with my parents, too, as an adult living at home. Only I had a different perspective back then. I had not remembered any of that.

It was also interesting to see what I had written about my future husband and myself and the problems I anticipated us having as we headed off into marriage. And all these years later, I could see that I was right. They were the problems that we have faced over and over again in our marriage.

As I told my husband about my insight into our future as a 22 year old, he jokingly said, “well, I guess you shouldn’t have married me.”

But I can honestly say that never crossed my mind. I’d marry him all over again in a heartbeat. And so I responded, “If it wouldn’t have been those problems, then it would’ve been different ones.”

Yes, we have issues. Every marriage does. There is no perfect relationship. (Why do we think there will be? Could it be the romance novels we read? Or the chick flicks we watch? Why in the world are our expectations so high?)

But we work through them, one step at a time, with candor, forgiveness, a sense of humor, and total commitment.

And how gratifying to realize almost 26 years later, that we have made some progress. We are not the same people we were when I was writing all those years ago. We have changed and matured and become just a little bit more like Jesus as we have added years. Oh, those flaws flare up and still stare us both in the face sometimes, but it isn’t as often. And it isn’t as severe.

I don’t know if you have your life recorded in journals. If you do, why not pull one out and take a few moments and look back? See how far you’ve come. If you don’t, then just take a few moments and think about how far you’ve come. Whether you are 25 or 95, think about your past years. Has your marriage relationship improved over the years? Have you become more like Jesus? Praise the Lord if the answer is yes. The Holy Spirit is working to sanctify you, just as we believers are promised in scripture (I Peter 1:2). But if it is no, don’t despair! Start today to create a new future! One step at a time. It is never too late! (And remember, real and lasting change can only be found after our relationship with God has been made right. If you don’t know Him personally, please click here.)

Our future is created one moment at a time. We are given choices each and every day–we can choose our attitude, our responses, our reactions — and these small choices are what creates the person we will become.

I didn’t think so deeply back when I was writing that summer of 1988. I didn’t realize all of this. Now, looking back, I can see that the prayers of my parents and grandparents helped to keep me on the right track. So that’s my second point. Pray for your kids and grandkids. There is so much we don’t understand when we are young. And most of us don’t want to listen to anyone tell us about life. Let’s cover the young people we love with much prayer.

It was interesting to take a look back. And in some ways I’m jealous. Starting out in life sounds fun and exciting. But then I realize– I wouldn’t really want to go back and learn everything all over again. So, here I am, middle-aged and headed into the future. Still determined to become more like Jesus through the little choices I make every day. Failing daily, but always brushing myself off and starting over again!

Dealing with Difficult People

6 Comments / April 28, 2014 April 28, 2014

Have you ever had to deal with someone you just couldn’t make happy? Or perhaps it is someone who lies constantly, is consistently unkind, or very angry? Or maybe they just absolutely exhaust you by telling you all of their woes? Sometimes, if they are friends, we can gently extricate ourselves from these relationships. But, many times, we can’t. We may go to church together. Or we may work together. More often than not, our difficult relationships are within our own families.

So what then?

So often we continue to live with a sense of constant frustration in this state of affairs. When someone is affecting our personal peace or happiness, we can get really annoyed. But how should we look at these situations?

I have floundered in this area for years. If I was struggling in a relationship, I would grow irritated and hopeless. But then, a few months ago, I heard this sentence in a sermon–

We need to look at difficult people as the tools God uses to shape us to look more like Jesus.

Ever since that time, my whole viewpoint has changed. You see, I used to view these relationships as obstacles that were keeping me from looking like Jesus–unnecessary extra baggage that kept tempting me and causing me to fail (notice my finger of blame was pointed at them, not myself…)

But this one sentence clarified for me that I had it all wrong. ALL wrong. These people in my life are there to help, not hinder, my walk with Christ.

Because I have this new perspective, it changes everything. Oh, I still grow frustrated and annoyed, but I can see the big picture now. Instead of incidents seeming pointless and ridiculous, I see them as challenges I need to rise up and meet as Jesus would have.

I know this is so easy to say in principle. Some of you are almost buried underneath dysfunctional families or bad work situations. This isn’t an easy thing to live for any of us, but for some of you it probably feels impossible. I hope that this helps, at least a little.

You see, we can’t change anyone but ourselves. But, by the power of the Holy Spirit, we can change ourselves. Let’s rise up and meet the challenge of personal change instead of being so worried about the pointless, fruitless endeavor of changing the other person.

De-Sensitized

Leave a Comment / April 1, 2014 October 22, 2017

SO…I spent most of the past week battling some type of cold or flu. Not sure what it was, but besides making me all around miserable and even a permanent resident on my sofa for a couple of those days, it also made me lose all sense of taste and smell. While I can recall having bad colds and flus before, I cannot ever recall losing almost all sense of taste and smell. It’s actually really weird.

It first started with my morning coffee one day last week. It just tasted…off. I dumped it down the drain and tried a different k-cup. Maybe the first one was old. But, no, it was the same thing with the second cup. Coffee is usually one of the first things to go when I have a cold, so I wasn’t all that surprised. But then my fruit-infused water tasted off and basically anything I put in my mouth had no flavor. I could just barely taste salty and really sweet things.

I am still not tasting very well. It makes it very easy not to eat. Maybe someone should look into this for a new weight loss technique?

But, of course, as usual, it got me thinking. Why doesn’t anything taste good? Because I’m sick. Why can’t I smell anything? Because I’m sick.

And I started thinking over the years of my life and how my hunger for God’s Word has grown in the recent years. As a young person, I had a really hard time sitting down to read the Bible. And I wonder if I wasn’t a little like my physical body–so sickened spiritually by all the junk I was taking in or the sinful habits that had ensnared me, that I was de-sensitized to the beautiful, life-changing Word of God.

I think sometimes we wonder why God’s word doesn’t “taste” good to us (Psalm 119:103). We sit down and try to read it and we find it dry and boring. I have been there. But now I realize that it is me– not the Bible– that is the cause of my lack of interest.

If we are making a conscious effort to please God, with a humble heart and a deep desire to be holy, then, while we will make mistakes and still sin (obviously), God’s Word will fill a deep hunger inside us that will be nonexistent otherwise. And it will taste wonderful. Like life-giving water.

I’m still growing and still learning, so this is just a theory. I still have some days where I am reading the Bible and I grow disinterested or distracted. But, after this week’s experience, I may just take my spiritual temperature on those days because I know it is my problem.

You know I believe a very large part of the problem in the modern day church stems from biblical illiteracy. If we don’t know our Bibles we can not really even know God, we won’t be able to discern and defend truth, and we will fall prey to any wind of false doctrine that comes along. If Satan can trap us in a sinful habit or busyness or worldly entertainment, he knows it will diminish our hunger for the bread of life.

Wow. The things you can learn from being sick. I’ll just think about this while I sip my coffee that still tastes like…not much of anything. I am very much anticipating the return of my taste buds!

SEE–

2 Timothy 3:16

Hebrews 4:12

Psalm 119

James 1:21-22

But Why, God?

2 Comments / March 24, 2014 March 24, 2014

Something terrible happened over the weekend to a really nice family. I don’t know them all that well, but I do know that, from my purely human point of view, they certainly didn’t deserve this tragedy in their lives.

I found myself really questioning the goodness of God as I tried to sort through all of this in my mind. Bad things happen to godly people. We know this is a fact of life. And, yet, sometimes, it just hits us and our spirit cries out to the Lord, asking “But why, God?”

It wasn’t that I was questioning Him. I know (in my head) that He is good all the time. And I know that He loves this family and that hasn’t changed because He has allowed this tragedy in their lives. But my heart was having a really hard time wrapping itself around the why. What good purpose could this possibly have?

I don’t have the answer to that. Just like good purposes and lessons learned do not always show forth through the hard moments and difficult times in my own life, I may never know why this family has suffered so.

But God knows. I try to remember that He sees the whole tapestry, while I only see a tiny speck of it. One tiny dot in the scope of all of time in the whole world. I can’t help but realize that I really know nothing and should not judge God based on my very limited perspective.

As I was pondering all of this, I just “happened” to read the following in a *fiction book I am reading–

“See, typically we measure goodness by whether we like something or not. I like this, so it’s good. I don’t like that, so it’s not good. We can do this with God, pretty easily, in fact. If He does something we like or agree with, then He’s good. If He does something or allows something we don’t like, we’re not so sure anymore. We won’t usually say it out loud; that would be impolite. But we can go there in our hearts. And once we do, we start to pull away from the Lord . Do you think that could have happened here?”

And this–

“God doesn’t just do good, Shawn. He is good. His goodness flows from his very nature. Because we don’t always understand what He’s doing, some of it doesn’t seem good to us. But that’s where our faith comes into play. We must believe, as Paul says, that God is working all things together for our good. In time, His goodness and good purposes will become clearer to us. But it can take time.”

Wow. A sermon to me right in the middle of a novel, just when I needed it. And people say there is no personal God? I beg to differ.

Of course, that last sentence — about His purposes becoming clearer in time–while that is sometimes true, it isn’t always true, is it? Sometimes we will never find out this side of heaven.

But how convicted I was by that first thought— Wasn’t I judging God’s goodness based on my perception of what is good? Only God knows the ramifications of any tragedy. He knows whose hearts will be touched and what seeds will be planted. He knows the spiritual growth that will take place and the relationships that will be changed. We can’t see it all, because we are limited by time and our own perspectives. I keep coming back to that word “limited”.

And I realized something — how dare I judge God based on my own limited and humanly flawed knowledge? How dare I? Who do I think I am, anyway?

I remember a friend once saying that she believes it is actually a sin to question God and to ask why. I am not sure about that, but I do believe that if we don’t come to a place of utter submission to His will after our initial and natural questioning, we will struggle all of our lives in our relationship with Him. It is about sovereignty and submission. Very very unpopular words in this culture we find ourselves.

And, interestingly enough, as I was thinking through all of this, another friend who is going through an extremely difficult time in her life shared with me a really amazing way she has seen the Lord take her tragedy and bring someone to Himself because of it. Now if that isn’t an encouragement to keep trusting, I don’t know what is.

But, no matter what outcomes we do or do not see, scripture teaches us that we are to keep submitting and trusting, knowing that our heavenly Father loves us and will keep us in His care, no matter what we face (I Peter 5:7; Lamentations 3:25; 2 Corinthians 1:3-4).

*Walsh, Dan (2010-06-01). Homecoming, The: A Novel (Kindle Locations 3581-3584 & 3588-3591). Baker Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.