biblical counsel – Page 38

Pushing Too Hard

4 Comments / April 26, 2012 April 26, 2012

A few evenings ago I found myself grating soap for a project*. Three bars of Fels-Naptha soap had to be grated into a bucket for this project to be completed. And so I unwrapped the first bar and started grating. I pushed really hard on the grater and could feel its plastic frame bending beneath the pressure. My arm grew tired and I started wondering what I had gotten myself into. When I had only a little bit of that first bar left, it hit me. Pushing the soap onto the grater so strongly may be hindering this process…not helping. And so with the next bar, I decided to let the grater do the work. Instead of pushing, I simply guided the soap. The last two bars went so much more smoothly than that first one and were half the work. And I realized that had I kept pushing so hard, I would have probably broken my grater and came away from the project with a very sore arm.

And I wondered…could this be similar to how it works with someone we love? Specifically, I was thinking of my husband and older children. When I see something in their lives that just isn’t honoring the Lord, do I tend to push (nag, complain, punish, constantly bring it up)?

Of course, there are situations where we have to push. But, more often than not, in my own personal experience, pushing leads to broken relationships and a very tired “pusher”. Could it be that guiding and praying is a better way to deal with some situations?

I can think of several issues over the years where this has been true, but most recently, a specific issue comes to mind. A few years ago I became very concerned about a pattern I was seeing in the life of one of my children. This child was drinking multiple sodas every day and eating a ton of candy. They were old enough to make their own decisions and spent enough time outside our home that I could not control what they were putting into their body. I grew worried about the long-term ramifications of this pattern and so I started pushing. “You shouldn’t be drinking this.” “You shouldn’t be eating that.” I was mostly ignored. “I’ve got to die from something, Mom,” they would say. After awhile, I realized that my words weren’t helping and I backed off and started praying.

That was probably a year ago now. A few months ago, this child started making changes in their eating patterns. Awareness had dawned and changes were following. Only a few weeks ago, this same child came to me one morning and shared their serious intention to start curbing their sugar intake. Their choices since then shows that they meant what they said that day. Wow. Really? Thank you, Lord! You can change my child without my constant pushing and nagging!

Parenting is tough. Marriage is tough. But perhaps sometimes we make it so much harder when we try to push and pull and be the ones to bring about change in the lives of the ones we love instead of leaving it up to God?

And that is what I learned from grating a few bars of soap.

*In case you are curious, the project was making my own powdered detergent for my HE washer. I found the recipe on Pinterest and thought I would give it a try. I have used it for several loads already and so far, so good!

“Enough” Day

Leave a Comment / April 23, 2012 July 14, 2015

Perhaps it is time to let the Joneses know that the war is over and they have won. Perhaps we should declare Enough Day. Enough of keeping up with the Joneses, enough gadgets, enough clothing. As I browsed through a New York City store on Saturday, I became aware of how important this declaration is. As my daughter and I walked through the store and saw the expensive earrings, the amazing dresses, and the stylish shirts, the gnawing of “if only” started in our hearts. If only we could afford this. If only we could buy that.

But if we buy it we are only going to want something else. We realize that, right? It doesn’t solve the “want it right now” problem–we just find a different thing to want. I have first-hand experience with this, so you can trust that I know what I am talking about.

So what are some ways to help curb our appetite for “stuff”?

1) Go shopping as little as possible. You really don’t even know what you are missing if you don’t pay too close attention. It isn’t until I walk through a store that I realize what I can’t (or shouldn’t) buy. It isn’t until I walk through the store that I even care.

2) Realize that we don’t need the next best thing. Technology is the place where we really struggle with this insatiable desire. And Apple and Microsoft play off of this, don’t they? We buy the latest and greatest and within a few short months it is outdated and old. I found this true with my iPad 1. I was so excited to get an iPad. And I do use it quite a bit for both business and personal use. But shortly after I bought it, iPad 2 came out. Oh well, I don’t really need a camera on my iPad. Then iPad 3 came out. Wow, they keep talking about the incredible retina display. Perhaps it is time to upgrade? But after a few minutes of thought, I realized I don’t need an iPad 3. It was that unhealthy desire creeping in. In the world we find ourselves in, a cool new thing is introduced every few months. Oh, how we need to learn to be content with what we have.

3) Stop making our stuff such a priority. Have you ever seen someone get angry if they find a tiny scratch in their car? Or perhaps really get upset if someone accidentally breaks their latest gadget? We tend to put too much importance on our stuff. It becomes more important to us than it should. This is a tough one. Sometimes we value our stuff more than we value people. We often have our priorities all turned around. We need to get them back to the way they should be.

4) Use our material blessings for the glory of God. We need to remember that, as believers, all we own isn’t ours, anyway. If we have been blessed with a spacious home, then let’s use it for Christian hospitality. If we have some extra money in our budget, let’s give it away instead of buying something for ourselves. Let’s remember that everything we have has been given to us by God to use for His glory. We are to be good stewards of any material possessions that have been graciously provided to us. Sometimes we forget this important fact.

5) Keep our eyes off of others’ stuff. This is true in more ways than one. First, we need to keep our eyes off of others so we don’t covet what they have. If we see that so-and-so has a brand new car, we tend to grow discontent that we can’t have one, too. But we also need to keep our eyes off of others so that we don’t judge them when it comes to material possessions. We need to remember that what someone has or owns is between them and the Lord. We don’t know that person’s heart or their salary. We should never judge anyone for what they do or do not have. Let’s worry about our own lives and hearts and what God is calling us to do and keep our eyes off of others.

The declaration of “Enough” day actually came from a sermon by David Jeremiah that I was listening to the other day. It hit home for me. I truly do need to learn to be content with what I have. Because it is only through contentment that we can experience the true joy and peace that should come along with being a Christian.

Philippians 4:11-12 Not that I speak in regard to need, for I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content: I know how to be abased, and I know how to abound. Everywhere and in all things I have learned both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.

Our View of God, Our View of Man, and Why It Matters

Leave a Comment / April 19, 2012 October 2, 2016

Following is an abbreviated version of the talk I prepared for a Mom’s group this morning. I thank them for having me and, as this is the second request to speak on this particular topic in a matter of months, I thought some of you might be interested in it, as well.

Holiness. What is it? And why does it matter? Why has this word almost disappeared from mainstream Christianity?

I think it is in great part because we do not have a biblical definition of Who God is. We like to read about a “god” who meets our every need, who helps us find our purpose, and who grants our wishes. We aren’t so thrilled about a God who requires us to live holy and pure lives. We fill our minds with books that tell us who we want God to be, instead of the biblical description of God. God is holy, all-knowing, supreme, and loving. He hates sin and cannot tolerate it in any form. We need to get to know the God of the Bible in order to properly understand holiness. God doesn’t exist to give me purpose and He doesn’t exist to fulfill my every need. His wrath is mentioned in scripture more times than His love. We can’t fully understand holiness if we are trying to define God in a way that pleases our emotions.

I also believe that an unbiblical understanding of who we are as human beings is to blame. I heard a song on Christian radio a few months ago that says “Jesus help me understand that I was worth dying for.” I turned it off immediately. That isn’t biblical at all. The Bible tells us we WEREN’T worth dying for. That is the amazing beauty of salvation. It is God’s free gift to us, even though we were without any merit whatsoever. Over and over, outside the church and inside the church, we hear the common theme of how beautiful we are to Jesus. But this is not a biblical theme. Only through Jesus do we become pure and white and beautiful. Only through Him do we have any merit.

If we have a LOW view of God and a HIGH view of ourselves, it leads us to have a very LOW view of sin. We start believing that sin isn’t important. That God understands and will forgive. We don’t care about pleasing Him…we are more concerned with receiving blessings from the big “genie” in the sky. We become wrapped up in our own selfish desires, rights, and concerns and expect God to meet us there…instead of bending ourselves to His will and purposes. Holiness isn’t about a list of do’s and don’ts (what many like to call “legalism”), but it is instead a desire to show our love and gratitude to the God who has made a way for me, a sinner, to be reconciled with Him through the amazing sacrifice of His Son.

And this idea should affect all areas of our lives. I like to use the word “peas” to help me remember some of these areas (I really wanted to think of a meaningful word–but, alas, “peas” is the only thing my mind could come up with!)

1. Presentation–how do we present ourselves? What kind of language do we use? Are we modest in our dress? Do we complain all of the time? What do our priorities show about what we view as important? Can people tell we love the Lord by how we present ourselves?

2. Entertainment–what do we watch? What do we listen to? What do we read? If we couldn’t invite Jesus to join us…if our choices are full of the things God hates…then we can be sure we shouldn’t be watching, listening to, or reading it. I fail to understand the rationalization that goes on in this area on a consistent basis by believers. If God hates it, we shouldn’t want any part of it — in real life OR on a page, a screen, or our car radio.

3. Attitude–Who are we at home? Are we kind, loving, and patient, or do we only put that face on when we are at church or work? How would our families describe us? Do we think of others and their needs? Do we have an attitude of graciousness and kindness or do others view us as selfish, unpleasant, or angry?

4. Stewardship–How do we spend our money? Do we live in constant debt? How do we treat the bodies we have been blessed with? Do we overeat or eat to comfort ourselves? How about the hours of each day? Do we waste hours on activities that have no eternal value whatsoever?

Each of us probably struggles in one area more than another, but we all struggle. I, personally, REALLY struggle with some of the things I have just mentioned. But all four of the things listed above aren’t options but should be an outpouring of the love we feel for our God.

You see, holiness is about pleasing the Lord with every area of our life. Eric Ludy puts it this way: ” Anything that turns the mind to self instead of the heavenly is opposite of Jesus; if it will not serve the purposes of Jesus Christ it has no allowance to be there.”

You know in your heart today where you struggle. You know what part of your life you are struggling to live in purity and holiness. We are all different. But we are all the same in this: We battle against our flesh and selfish desires.

But let us remember this:

“God is only truly known in the soul as we yield ourselves to Him, submit to His authority, and regulate all the details of our lives by His holy precepts and commandments.” A.W. Pink

May we never give up our quest to please our heavenly Father with our life and our choices. May we keep Him and knowing Him as our priority. May we turn away from our rebellious hearts. And may we be wise and discerning in what we allow in our minds and our lives. And may we never forget that the Lord will be with us all of the way, to strengthen and guide us. He is faithful forever. What a great God we serve!

Resources:

The Attributes of God by A.W. Pink (book) I wish every Christian would read this book. It has been invaluable in helping me understand who God is.

The Power of a Holy Life by John MacArthur (article) Excellent article on how Holy Living affects the world around us.

No More Games: Living and Breathing the Holiness of God by James MacDonald (sermon series) I haven’t heard this whole series but what I have heard is excellent!

Using Words Wisely

Leave a Comment / April 12, 2012 April 12, 2012

Before I start today, I just want you to know that I have my husband’s permission to tell this story. He learned a good lesson through this incident several years ago. I feel so blessed to be married to someone who admits his mistakes and chooses to grow from them. Now on to the story–

“What does he want now? He always has a problem, doesn’t he? He is such a pain!” These words, or at least words like these, spilled out of my husband’s mouth as he spewed much of the frustration he had felt towards a troublesome customer for some years. His employee was at the complaining customer’s property and had called with a question. Unfortunately for my husband, the employee on the other end of the call was using his Nextel and had put it on speaker phone. He had called with the customer right beside him and said customer had just heard my husband’s entire deluge of words directed at him.

What to do? Our employee handled it as best he could. He left my husband know immediately and in a nonchalant way that the man was right beside him and listening. The conversation became stilted and was finished quickly. My husband’s heart sank. What kind of mess had he gotten himself into now? He tries to treat all customers courteously and kindly, but every now and again, one stretches him to his limits.

After the mortifying realization of what had occurred, he made the decision to go and apologize to this man. And, quite honestly, he was very well received. After the apology and some open discussion, our relationship with this customer improved considerably and he is still our customer to this day.

As we laugh about it now, we also realize that there are some important lessons to be learned from the unfortunate incident.

1. There will be people who frustrate us in life. It is important that we apply scriptural principles in our dealings with them. In Luke 6:31, Jesus says: And just as you want men to do to you, you also do to them likewise. If we apply this principle with the irritating people in our lives, it should change our responses.

2. It is important to choose our words carefully, even when we are frustrated or irritated. Too often we spout off words we don’t even mean in the heat of the moment. Whether they are about someone or directly to that person, we need to use self-control when we express our frustration.

3. Don’t be too proud to apologize. The last thing my husband wanted to do was to go to this customer and apologize. First, he doesn’t know him that well personally and second, it was just downright embarrassing. So many times we are afraid to face the person we have offended or hurt, so we just pretend it will go away. But it doesn’t! That pain and hurt, even if forgiven, often lingers on in the heart of the person we hurt. It is important that we offer our sincere apology immediately. In the case of this customer, it was the best thing my husband could have done. And, from my own experience (with my many mistakes in life!), it does get easier the more you do it. If you are out of practice of apologizing, the first time will be agonizing. You will stumble over your words and hesitate and feel foolish. But try it! I think you will find it so beneficial to your relationships, and at the very least, you will know that you have done the right thing.

4. It is important to choose our words carefully always, but especially when we are in a public setting–on the phone, in the bleachers or on the sidelines, in a church hallway, or at a family gathering. Ephesians 4:29 says: Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers. Does my speech impart grace to the hearers? What a great test for our language.

Life is full of unpleasant, uncomfortable, and awkward circumstances. It is important that we don’t miss the life lessons hidden in those moments. The story above was just one such moment and even now, years later, we still think on the lessons we learned from that unpleasant incident.

Glorious Freedom

2 Comments / April 5, 2012 March 23, 2016

Johnny was born into slavery. He was hauling water and helping his mama in the kitchen since he could remember. As he grew older, he became his master’s special servant. He would help his master get dressed in the morning, run errands for him, and serve his meals. He was expected to be available at all times, just in case his master needed anything. Johnny obeyed his master, Mr. Clark, because that was his duty.

But, over the years, a strange thing happened. Mr. Clark began to feel a fatherly love in his heart for young Johnny. He saw Johnny’s lack of education and hired a tutor. He saw his need for clothing and hired a tailor. He even started having Johnny join him in the main dining room for meals. You see, Mr. Clark did not have any children and was a very lonely man. After several years, Mr. Clark decided to adopt Johnny as his very own son. Mr. Clark even changed his will so that Johnny became the sole heir of his vast estate.

After Mr. Clark adopted Johnny, you may think that their relationship changed. Suddenly, Johnny could do what he wanted. He was free. But Johnny continued to serve Mr. Clark in the same capacity. Only now it wasn’t because it was his duty but, instead, because of his love for his master–who was now also his father.

I would submit to you that our freedom in Christ is quite similar. I believe that Christian freedom has been misinterpreted for so long now, that we don’t even question whether or not today’s definition of “Christian Freedom” is biblical. Christian freedom isn’t about what we are allowed to do–it is about what we can do. What can we do to please the Father who adopted us as sons and daughters? What choice will bring glory to God?

This applies to everything–from the tone of voice we choose to use when we are frustrated to whom we decide to marry. From what show or movie we watch on our television after a long, hard day to which career path we follow. Our desire to please the One who saved us should encompass every decision we make.

If we view Christian freedom as an excuse to fulfill our own desires and lusts (Galatians 5:13), we mock the cross. Christ loved us so much that He died to free us from the heavy chains of sin. And yet so many of us crawl right back to the sinful place we started and wallow there, claiming Christ’s continual forgiveness–or even worse yet, claiming that our salvation has eradicated the need for “rules”. And you would be right: Rules no longer dictate our behavior after we are saved.

But is this even the question we should be asking? Just like Johnny obeyed out of love, so we, too, upon our adoption by our Heavenly Father, change from obeying God’s law out of duty to obeying it out of love. The law doesn’t change–our hearts change. What is expected of us doesn’t change, it is why we do what is expected of us that changes. No longer do we feel like obedience is a chore, but, instead, we now consider it a privilege. And so, from the smallest choice to every life-changing decision, our question becomes: How can I best please my God?

As we celebrate Easter this weekend, may we remember that Christ died and rose again to free us from our chains. May we consider this amazing grace and our eternal inheritance with all sobriety and sacredness. And may we endeavor to please Him because we love Him more than we love ourselves.

Righteous Anger

8 Comments / March 29, 2012 March 29, 2012

I found myself really angry the other day. My daughter, Susan (names have been changed to protect the innocent), had said something very hurtful to me. We were sitting as a family at the dinner table eating and talking, when out popped this comment from Susan’s mouth. I felt myself grow hot with anger. My pride was hurt and I grew cold and quiet. I escaped to my office and spent the rest of the night working, as far from Susan as I could get. The following morning I did not treat Susan very kindly. She finally asked me about why I wasn’t being very nice. And, I am ashamed to say, that all of that coldness and those hurt feelings came welling up in me and I started explaining to her in a very loud and not-so-nice voice why her comment had been hurtful, unkind, and downright wrong. And then I walked out and I may have even slammed the door.

I was immediately totally and completely ashamed of myself. My whole reaction from the time the comment was made to the moment I spoke unkindly was sinful. What had I just done? And why was I so angry? I was angry because of a derogatory comment directed towards me. My sinful self shines so brightly in situations like this. And I am mortified at how quickly it shows itself. And so, within five minutes, I was apologizing, and a few minutes later we had a good long talk as to why that comment was made in the first place (which was actually frustration about a totally different situation).

So what does it matter? Why do I feel this is worth a blog post? In a conversation with a woman the other day she was telling me about her husband’s anger and how he will use the excuse that Jesus got angry. Many of us do that. Well, Jesus got angry, so I am allowed to get angry. We don’t view anger as the sin it is.

But, let’s stop and think for just a moment about that incident in the temple (Mark 11). Jesus went into the temple and drove out the moneychangers. Why was He angry that they were there? He was angry because they were offending God the Father. They were turning worship into a business.

And then let’s turn back to the last time we got angry. Was it because someone used God’s name in vain? Or because they are murdering babies in the womb every day? Or perhaps because they have glorified sin and have offended my Savior? In my case, it was because someone offended my pride. Other times it is because I don’t get my own way. Or perhaps someone did something hurtful to my child and I get angry about that.

Truly righteous anger is when we are offended because someone is offending our God. Any other anger is sinful. That is hard to swallow if we are someone who grows angry rather quickly. Some of us are so prone to outbursts of anger that we don’t even give it a thought anymore. It is just part of who we are and we don’t even feel conviction about it. We tell our spouses and children that it is just who we are and we can’t change it (which is just a lie and an excuse, of course).

And some of us rarely get angry. Our personalities are just pretty laid back and we don’t get riled about much of anything. If you are like this, you are probably wondering why I would even write on this topic.

And some of you are like me – very convicted about how angry and offended we get and realizing that this is not an attitude that pleases God. And so we continue the cycle of growing angry and then apologizing. And while I don’t expect perfection on this side of heaven, I have seen many people grow and mature in this area of anger. Even in my own life I have noticed that these angry moments have grown fewer and farther between. We can have victory in Christ! We don’t have to let our anger rule over us…but instead must choose to rule over it.

As I look out my window this morning, I see a beautiful sun-drenched sky. I see the beginning of a new day. Let’s take our focus off of ourselves for this one day. Let’s turn away from our offended and angry thoughts and stop and think for just a second about why we are so angry instead of letting our emotions take over. Let’s say YES to the Spirit and NO to the flesh. (Galatians 5: 16-25).

My Heart, Christ’s Home

Leave a Comment / March 15, 2012 March 15, 2012

Below is an old story that has brought delight and conviction to others for many years. When I read it the first time, my heart was smitten. I realized how much of my life I was withholding from the Lord. We truly are to surrender all. I believe this little story is a good reminder for all of us.

My Heart, Christ’s Home

by Robert Boyd Munger

One evening I invited Jesus Christ into my heart. What an entrance He made! It was not a spectacular, emotional thing, but very real. It was at the very center of my life. He came into the darkness of my heart and turned on the light. He built a fire in the cold hearth and banished the chill. He started music where there had been stillness, and He filled the emptiness with His own loving, wonderful fellowship. I have never regretted opening the door to Christ and I never will – not into eternity!

This, of course, is the first step in making the heart Christ’s home. He has said, “Behold I stand at the door and knock: if any man hear my voice and open the door, I will come in to him, and will sup with him, and he with me.” (Revelation 3:20). If you are interested in making your life an abode of the living God, let me encourage you to invite Christ into your heart and He will surely come.

After Christ entered my heart and in the joy of this new relationship I said to Him, “Lord, I want this heart of mine to be Yours. I want to have You settle down here and be perfectly at home. Everything I have belongs to You. Let me show You around and introduce you to the various features of the home that you may be more comfortable and that we may have fuller fellowship together.” He was very glad to come, of course, and happier still to be given a place in the heart.

The Library

The first room was the study – the library. Let us call it the study of the mind. Now in my home this room of the mind is a very small room with very thick walls. But it is an important room. In a sense, it is the control room of the house. He entered with me and looked around at the books in the bookcase, the magazines upon the table, the pictures on the walls. As I followed His gaze I became uncomfortable. Strangely enough, I had not felt badly about this before, but now that He was there looking at these things I was embarrassed. There were some books were there that His eyes were too pure to behold. There was a lot of trash and literature on the table that a Christian had no business reading, and as for the pictures on the walls – the imaginations and thoughts of the mind – these were shameful.

I turned to Him and said, “Master, I know that this room needs a radical alteration. Will You help me make it what it ought to be? – to bring every thought into captivity to you?”

“Surely!” He said. “Gladly will I help you. First of all, take all the things that you are reading and looking at which are not helpful, pure, good and true, and throw them out! Now put on the empty shelves the books of the Bible. Fill the library with Scriptures and meditate on them day and night. As for the pictures on the walls, you will have difficulty controlling these images, but here is an aid” He gave me a full-size portrait of Himself. “Hang this centrally,” He said, “on the wall of the mind.” I did, and I have discovered through the years that when my thoughts are centered upon Christ Himself, His purity and power cause impure thoughts to back away. So He has helped me to bring my thoughts into captivity.

May I suggest to you if you have difficulty with this little room of the mind, that you bring Christ in there. Pack it full with the Word of God, meditate upon it and keep before it the immediate presence of the Lord Jesus.

The Dining Room

From the study we went into the dining room, the room of appetites and desires. Now this was a very large room. I spent a good deal of time in the dining room and much effort in satisfying my wants. I said to Him, “This is a favorite room. I am quite sure You will be pleased with what we serve.”

He seated Himself at the table with me and asked, “What is on the menu for dinner?” “Well,” I said, “my favorite dishes: money, academic degrees, and stocks, with newspaper articles of fame and fortune as side dishes.” These were the things I liked – worldly fare. I suppose there was nothing radically wrong in any particular item, but it was not the food that should satisfy the life of a real Christian.

When the food was placed before Him, He said nothing about it. However, I observed that He did not eat it, and I said to Him, somewhat disturbed, “Master, don’t You care for this food? What is the trouble?”

He answered, “I have meat to eat that you do not know of. My meat is to do the will of Him that sent Me.” He looked at me again and said, “If you want food that really satisfies you, seek the will of the Father, not your own pleasures, not your own desires, and not your own satisfaction. Seek to please Me and that food will satisfy you.”

And there at the table He gave me a taste of doing God’s will. What a flavor! There is no food like it in all the world. It alone satisfies. Everything else is dissatisfying in the end.

Now if Christ is in your heart, and I trust He is, what kind of food are you serving Him and what kind of food are you eating yourself? Are you living for the lust of the flesh and the pride of life – selfishly? Or are you choosing God’s will for your meat and drink?

The Living Room

We walked next into the living room. This room was rather intimate and comfortable. I liked it. It had a fireplace, overstuffed chairs, a sofa, and a quiet atmosphere. He also seemed pleased with it. He said, “This is indeed a delightful room. Let us come here often. It is secluded and quiet, and we can fellowship together.”

Well, naturally as a young Christian I was thrilled. I couldn’t think of anything I would rather do than have a few minutes with Christ in intimate companionship. He promised, “I will be here early every morning. Meet me here, and we will start the day together.” So morning after morning, I would come downstairs to the living room and He would take a book of the Bible from the bookcase. He would open it and then we would read together. He would tell me of its riches and unfold to me its truths. He would make my heart warm as He revealed His love and His grace He had toward me. These were wonderful hours together. In fact, we called the living room the “withdrawing room.” It was a period when we had our quiet time together.

But, little by little, under the pressure of many responsibilities, this time began to be shortened. Why, I’m don’t know, but I thought I was just too busy to spend time with Christ. This was not intentional, you understand; it just happened that way. Finally, not only was the time shortened, but I began to miss a day now and then. It was examination time at the university. Then it was some other urgent emergency. I would miss it two days in a row and often more.

I remember one morning when I was in a hurry, rushing downstairs, eager to be on my way. As I passed the living room, the door was open. Looking in, I saw a fire in the fireplace and Jesus was sitting there. Suddenly in dismay I thought to myself, “He was my guest. I invited Him into my heart! He has come as Lord of my home. And yet here I am neglecting Him.”

I turned and went in. With downcast glance, I said, “Blessed Master, forgive me. Have You been here all these mornings?” “Yes,” He said, “I told you I would be here every morning to meet with you.” Then I was even more ashamed. He had been faithful in spite of my faithfulness. I asked His forgiveness and He readily forgave me as He does when we are truly repentant.

“The trouble with you is this: you have been thinking of the quiet time, of the Bible study and prayer time, as a factor in your own spiritual progress, but you have forgotten that this hour means something to me also. Remember, I love you. I have redeemed you at great cost. I value your fellowship. Now,” He said, “do not neglect this hour if only for my sake. Whatever else may be your desire, remember I want your fellowship!”

You know, the truth that Christ desires my companionship, that He loves me, wants me to be with Him, wants to be with me and waits for me, has done more to transform my quiet time with God than any other single fact. Don’t let Christ wait alone in the living room of your heart, but every day find some time when, with your Bible and in prayer, you may be together with Him.

The Workroom

Before long, He asked, “Do you have a workroom in your home?” Down in the basement of the home of my heart I had a workbench and some equipment, but I was not doing much with it. Once in a while I would play around with a few little gadgets, but I wasn’t producing anything substantial or worthwhile.

I led Him down there. He looked over the workbench and what little talents and skills I had. He said, “This is quite well furnished. What are you producing with your life for the Kingdom of God?” He looked at one or two little toys that I had thrown together on the bench and held one up to me. “Are these little toys all that you are doing for others in your Christian life?”

“Well,” I said, “Lord, that is the best I can do. I know it isn’t much, and I really want to do more, but after all, I have no skill or strength to do more.” “Would you like to do better?” He asked.

“Certainly,” I replied. “All right. Let me have your hands. Now relax in me and let my Spirit work through you. I know that you are unskilled, clumsy and awkward, but the Holy Spirit is the Master-Worker, and if He controls your hands and your heart, He will work through you.” And so, stepping around behind me and putting His great, strong hands over mine, controlling the tools with His skilled fingers He began to work through me.

There’s much more that I must still learn and I am very far from satisfied with the product that is being turned out, but I do know that whatever has been produced for God has been through His strong hand and through the power of His Spirit in me.

Do not become discouraged because you cannot do much for God. Your ability is not the fundamental condition. It is He who is controlling your fingers and upon whom you are relying. Give your talents and gifts to God and He will do things with them that will surprise you..

The Rec Room

I remember the time He asked me about the playroom. I was hoping He would not ask about that. There were certain associations and friendships, activities and amusements that I wanted to keep for myself. I did not think Christ would enjoy them or approve of them, so I evaded the question.

But there came an evening when I was on my way out with some of my friends, and as I was about to cross the threshold, He stopped me with a glance and asked, “Are you going out?” I replied, “Yes.” “Good,” He said, “I would like to go with you.”

“Oh,” I answered rather awkwardly. “I don’t think, Lord Jesus, that You would really want to go with us. Let’s go out tomorrow night. Tomorrow night we will go to prayer meeting, but tonight I have another appointment.”

He said. “That’s alright. Only I thought that when I came into your home, we were going to do everything together, to be close companions. I just want you to know that I am willing to go with you.” “Well,” I said, “we will go someplace together tomorrow night.”

That evening I spent some miserable hours. I felt wretched. What kind of a friend was I to Jesus when I was deliberately leaving Him out of my associations, doing things and going places that I knew very well He would not enjoy? When I returned that evening, there was a light in His room, and I went up to talk it over with Him. I said, “Lord, I have learned my lesson. I can’t have a good time without You. From now on we will do everything together.”

Then we went down into the playroom of the house and He transformed it. He brought into life real joy, real happiness, real satisfaction, new friends, new excitement, new joys. Laughter and music have been ringing through the house ever since.

The Hall Closet

There is just one more matter that I might share with you. One day I found Him waiting for me at the door. An arresting look was in His eye. As I entered, He said to me, “There is a peculiar odor in the house. There is something dead around here. It’s upstairs. I think it is in the hall closet.” As soon as He said this, I knew what He was talking about. Yes, there was a small closet up there on the landing, just a few feet square, and in that closet, behind lock and key, I had one or two little personal things that I did not want anyone to know about and certainly I did not want Christ to see them. I knew they were dead and rotting things left over from the old life. And yet I loved them, and I wanted them so for myself that I was afraid to admit they were there.

Reluctantly, I went up with Him, and as we mounted the stairs the odor became stronger and stronger. He pointed at the door. “It’s in there! Some dead thing!” I was angry. That’s the only way I can put it. I had given Him access to the library, the dining room, the living room, the workroom, the playroom, and now He was asking me about a little two-by-four closet. I said to myself, “This is too much. I am not going to give Him the key.”

“Well,” He said, reading my thoughts, “if you think I’m going to stay up here on the second floor with this odor, you are mistaken. I will take my bed out on the back porch. I’m certainly not going to put up with that.” Then I saw Him start down the stairs.

When you have come to know and love Christ, the worst thing that can happen is to sense His fellowship retreating from you. I had to surrender. “I’ll give You the key,” I said sadly, “but You’ll have to open the closet and clean it out. I haven’t the strength to do it.” “I know,” He said. “I know you haven’t. Just give me the key. Just authorize me to take care of that closet and I will.” So with trembling fingers I passed the key to Him. He took it from my hand, walked over to the door, opened it, entered it, took out all the putrefying stuff that was rotting there, and threw it away. Then He cleaned the closet and painted it, fixed it up, doing it all in a moment’s time. Oh, what victory and release to have that dead thing out of my life!

Transferring the Title

Then a thought came to me. I said to myself, “I have been trying to keep this heart of mine clear for Christ. I start on one room and no sooner have I cleaned that then another room is dirty. I begin on the second room and the first room becomes dusty again. I am so tired and weary trying to maintain a clean heart and an obedient life. I am just not up to it!”

So I ventured a question: “Lord, is there any chance that You would take over the responsibility of the whole house and operate it for me and with me just as You did that closet? Would You take the responsibility to keep my heart what it ought to be and my life where it ought to be?”

I could see His face light up as He replied, “Certainly, that is what I came to do. You cannot be a victorious Christian in your own strength. That is impossible. Let me do it through you and for you. That is the way. But,” He added slowly, “I am not owner of this house. I am just a guest. I have no authority to proceed, since the property is not mine.” I saw it in a minute and dropping to my knees, I said, “Lord, You have been a guest and I have been the host. From now on I am going to be the servant. You are going to be the owner and Master and Lord.”

Running as fast as I could to the strongbox, I took out the title deed to the house describing its assets and liabilities, location and situation and condition. I eagerly signed it over to belong to Him alone for time and eternity. “Here,” I said. “Here it is, all that I am and have forever. Now You run the house. I’ll just remain with You as a servant and friend.”

He took my life that day and I can give you my word, there is no better way to live the Christian life. He knows how to keep it in shape and deep peace settles down on the soul. May Christ settle down and be at home in your heart as Lord of all!

Marilla’s Crust

Leave a Comment / March 8, 2012 March 8, 2012

This summer we are planning a trip to Prince Edward Island. The movie, “Anne of Green Gables” and its sequels have long been a favorite in this home (well, at least among its female members). But I had never read the books. So I decided if we are going the whole way to P.E.I. I should at least read the first one. It was delightful reading, full of realistic, stirring characters and lovely descriptions of the landscape–a perfect escape for dreary winter hours. But I digress!

Last night, upon finishing the first of the series, Anne of Green Gables, I couldn’t help but think of the character of Marilla. Marilla was a spinster who, along with her brother Matthew, brought an eleven year old orphan girl into her home to raise. She had never been taught to share her feelings and found it difficult to praise Anne, even when Anne had accomplished something remarkable. Marilla, in effect, had a crust around her heart. And, yet, the author made it clear just how very much Marilla loved Anne and showed the conflict that Marilla felt within herself in those moments where something positive should have been said.

It gave me great insight into the characters we run into every day. Just a few weeks ago, I was quite pleased with something I had accomplished and someone, off-handedly, made me feel like they thought it was silly and unimportant. Marilla’s character helped me understand this in a new way.

You see, I am not sure we always say what we feel. Some of us just spout off words without thinking how they sound. And some of us, never having seen an example of giving encouragement and praise, find it extremely difficult to say nice things. Some of us, when we are overcome with emotion, say things that may even sound brusque or harsh. But we love deeply, just the same.

And I guess Marilla’s crusty exterior teaches us two things–

1) Our relationships with others must overflow with grace. We should never give up on anyone. Oftentimes, we do not know the circumstances or relationships that formed who they are today. People always do things for a reason. Life is too short to be holding grudges, anyway. Let’s strive to love others like Jesus loves them, no matter what they have said to us. Grace — what a wonderful word.

2) It makes me examine my personal use of language. Before speaking, let’s ask ourselves: Is this a necessary thing to say? Will it add or take away a block to the wall between us? Are these words going to edify this person or tear them down? (Ephesians 4:29) Scripture makes it quite clear that even when we need to confront someone about sin, it is to be done in Christian love. There is never room for harsh, unkind words. And yet some of us use them almost every day. May we strive to encourage others with our words, and, when necessary, may we wrap confrontation with loving kindness.

I am so glad I picked up Anne of Green Gables, by Lucy Maud Montgomery. It is a beautiful story full of life lessons. I highly recommend it!

Obeying the Coach

4 Comments / March 5, 2012 March 5, 2012

A month or so ago I found myself sitting on the bleachers in a gymnasium, waiting for a basketball game to start. I watched the floor as the assistant coach took the team through rigorous drills. He commanded and the team responded immediately. They didn’t care what they looked like or who was watching. As soon as their leader barked an order, they obeyed. That same immediate obedience and passion continued as the team played the game. Each player always had an ear out for what the head coach was shouting to them and obeyed his instructions. We all know this is really the only way a team can be successful. If one of them would have decided not to listen to the coach, it would have caused disorganization at the very least and chaos at most.

It was a team of high school boys and I couldn’t help but reflect on how often boys that age don’t want to be told what to do. So why were they so acquiescent for these coaches? I believe it is because playing basketball is something they love to do. The cost of obedience and hard work was worth the opportunity to play a sport they enjoy.

I couldn’t help but compare that to how we follow Jesus. We say we love Him and yet, so many of us want to listen to our own voices instead of His. We take Bible verses out of context and instead of obeying what it is truly commanding, we devise meanings that soothe our souls. And, in the meantime, the body of Christ reaps the harm of our personal choices.

We often choose to not obey, or perhaps partially obey:

“God, I will give you this $100, but I just can’t afford to give 10% all of the time.”

“God, I know that you have blessed me with this comfortable home, but I just don’t have the energy to host anyone.”

“God, I know you have given me a healthy, strong body and that there is something I could be doing to minister in my church, but I just don’t have time.”

“God, I know you call me to live a pure and holy life, but the entertainment of today is just so funny and it is only portraying real life.”

Of course, there would be many more examples. And we end up hurting not only ourselves but our team (the body of Christ) with our selfishness and our insistence to do things our own way. And I can’t help but go back to the question of why.

The basketball players obey because they love the game of basketball. Many of us claim to love Jesus, but we do not want the obedience and call to selfless and holy living that goes along with that claim. Oh, we want the perks of peace and joy and eternal life. But we would prefer to ignore the commands like deny ourselves (Luke 9:23), to be generous (2 Cor 9:5), to live a holy life (Ephesians 1:4), and that we should not love the world or the things in it (I John 2:15), just to name a few. We are called to completely surrender our lives to Christ.

So I look way down deep in my heart and ask the question: Do I love Jesus enough to follow without question or exception? Or am I squirming and questioning when it gets inconvenient and uncomfortable and costs me something? It is a sobering thought.

The S Word

7 Comments / February 27, 2012 February 27, 2012

If you are a Christian woman, you are very familiar with this word. You may have chosen to ignore it, you may refuse to do it, or you may struggle with it every day of your life. I am referring to the word submission. This is one of the hardest words for Christian women to come to terms with…or is it just me?

I do not even feel qualified to write about this. This is a constant struggle for me. But I guess if I only wrote about the things in life I have perfected, I would never write anything!

Whether we like it or not, the concept of a wife submitting to her husband is biblical (Ephesians 5 and Colossians 3). If you are a woman with leadership skills and a strong personality this directive is especially challenging.

Many of us are women who naturally take charge. We don’t mean to portray anything negative or unkind. Lots of times we don’t even realize we are taking control from our husbands. We are often so busy organizing and controlling our children that we just start trying to do the same with our husbands.

In our home, this leads to some fireworks! Thankfully, my husband isn’t going to tolerate me taking over his role as leader and so we have had to deal with this word on a frequent basis. I have truly had to give some contemplation to this word and what it means for me and my role in my marriage.

The other day while I was reading Galatians 3:28, which is the verse about how we are all one in Christ Jesus, my eyes slid down to the MacArthur notes at the bottom. And something caught my eye. It was about submission:

Nor is this spiritual equality incompatible with the God-ordained roles of headship and submission in the church, society, and at home. Jesus Christ, though fully equal with the Father, assumed a submissive role during his incarnation.

I don’t know why, but I had never thought of that before. And I realized that Jesus is our perfect model for submission. On the night before his crucifixion, when He prayed “Not My will, but Yours, be done,” He was submitting to the Father, someone who was His equal.

I think perhaps that is where I get messed up. In our culture, submission means inferiority. The lesser person submits to the powerful, greater person. But when the Bible talks about submission it is never about the issue of inferiority. It is hard for us to work through that, isn’t it? Submission feels like inferiority. But if we are practicing biblical submission and our husbands are practicing biblical love, then we are experiencing God’s perfect design for marriage. And it is good.

On this day, we all find ourselves in different places. You may be like me and have lots of fireworks in your home as you work through this issue. You may have this down because you are naturally a follower. You may be struggling because you have a husband who refuses to lead. Or you may have a husband who is unloving and unkind in his leadership. But, somehow or other, we Christian women all need to deal with this word. What a comfort to see Jesus’ example of this as He went to the cross to die for us.

May we be women who never give up trying to grow in this area of our lives, no matter how our husbands choose to play their role as leader. And by growing, may we set a good example for our daughters and the young girls who are watching us.