biblical counsel – Page 25

Found Out a Little Too Late

2 Comments / June 20, 2013 June 20, 2013

It all started when I decided to start running again. I began getting severe pain in my left knee, but I figured it was just because I hadn’t run in awhile, so I pushed through it. But when the pain became excruciating, I decided to use the elliptical machine for a little while to try to settle it down a bit. About a week before my scheduled Color Run (the reason I started running again), I decided to finally go see the doctor.

He looked at it, poked and prodded a bit, and then put me on an anti-inflammatory, telling me to use it as much as I was able and to come back if it doesn’t get better.

Fast forward four weeks. I took the pills, ran only about a third of the 5K and walked the rest. And then I came home and limped around for awhile. But the more I used the knee the more excruciating the pain became until I was forced to return to the doctor. He scheduled an MRI, which I had done yesterday. I am now waiting for the official results.

So why do I tell you this? I assure you that it is not to garner your pity, concern, or prayers. It’s just a knee. I can still walk and do what I have to do. I am not dying.

But here’s the thing– every time I sit down, every time I get up, every time I move that left leg, every time I bend or lift or stand or walk, I feel pain.

And I realized something. I have had over 45 years of trouble-free knees that I took completely for granted. I never thought about how well they worked or how much my life would be affected if they don’t. All of a sudden, I am calculating just how much walking a trip to the mall will be or just how long I can work in the garden without completely debilitating myself. Almost everything is now done with that painful knee in mind.

Chicago sang a song in the 80s called “Hard Habit to Break.” In that song is this line:

You don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone, and I found out a little too late.

That’s just so true, isn’t it? This singer is singing this song about a relationship he lost with a special girl, but we could sing these lines about many valuable blessings in our lives that were never appreciated until they were lost, couldn’t we?

~Our babies and toddlers.

~Our youthful, wrinkle-free bodies

~Our good health

~The financial means to meet our needs and many of our wants

~A job

~Our parents

~Our siblings

~Our spouse

~Our vehicle, or refrigerator, or washing machine, or dishwasher

~Our cell phone

How many of these things have we ever said thank you for? How many of them have we lost and then went on to complain about? Whether it be the death of a loved one (a BIG deal) or a broken cell phone (so minor in the scope of life, it’s hardly even worth mentioning)?

To keep myself filled with a heart of a gratitude, I started a journal about six months ago. In it, I write three things for which I am thankful. I don’t write every day or even every other day. But a few times each month, I stop for a moment to truly ponder what I am thankful for and to give whole-hearted thanks to God.

Funny how my knees never made it in on that list. I guess I will be writing “working knees” the next time.

I want to appreciate what I have while I have it, instead of missing it and realizing a little too late just how incredibly much I had been blessed.

What are you trying to tell me?

Leave a Comment / June 17, 2013 June 17, 2013

I was taking a Sunday afternoon nap. Sound asleep, I was suddenly jarred awake by a little white ball of fur leaping on my bed. My dog, Belle, did a quick circle and then hopped back down and literally ran out the door. I settled down for a moment or two before she returned, this time making her way up to my pillow and laying down right above my head, panting madly.

I knew she was trying to tell me something, but I could not figure out what it was. The other night, she had acted similarly during a storm, but this particular afternoon the weather was clear and, to my knowledge, nothing else traumatic was going on. What was she trying to tell me? When I asked her what was wrong, she didn’t magically speak to me but instead just stared at me, as if trying to send a message with those dark brown eyes.

Trying to understand what she was trying to tell me felt a little like trying to understand what God is trying to tell me about a specific decision sometimes. Sometimes I just want to say, “God, how about if you send a lone bolt of lightening for YES and big loud thunderclap for NO?” Wouldn’t that be nice?

Unfortunately, it is a rare occasion that God makes the answer to a decision extremely clear, but–on the bright side– there are some good biblical principles to follow which will help us discern the right direction–

1) What does the Bible say? Search the scriptures and discern everything God’s Word has to say about what you are agonizing over. You may have to do a generalized search. For example, if you are trying to decide about a new house or car, then search God’s Word for everything you can find about material wealth and our attitude towards it. If you are married and trying to decide about a business lunch with an attractive co-worker, then find all the passages you can on marriage and falling into adultery.

2) Obey what you know. There are some basics in God’s Word that we know we are to do: The Ten Commandments, loving God with all our hearts, loving others as we love ourselves, submitting to our husbands, loving our wives, submitting to our bosses, praying for our leaders. Let’s obey in the areas that are clear, so that we will be in right relationship with God and will be better able to understand the Holy Spirit’s guidance in the areas that are unclear.

3) Examine your motives. Is this decision all about me? Am I concerned with my feelings, my experience, my life, at the cost of anybody else’s?

4) Think about the outcome. What will be the fruit of this decision? Will it mean being in debt? Will it put you far away from family? Will this damage your reputation? Will this decision be a detriment to your relationship with Christ or others? Just spend a few minutes contemplating the fruit of the decision.

And if you do all of that and you still don’t know, I’ll tell you what I do: I pick a path and start walking, all the while praying that the Lord will close the doors if I didn’t pick the right one. He is faithful! He does show us which way we should go when we are in fellowship with Him; when we truly desire to please Him more than fulfilling our own selfish desires.

So much confusion and strife results when I make a decision based on what I want…when I live my life based on my desires and ambitions. I know this, because I have done it many times and continue to struggle with this.

Life can be tough and we rarely, if ever, get a message from God telling us what to do. But, thankfully, we have His Word as a guide and His promise to care for us. This is great comfort in the midst of making a decision.

I Peter 5: 6-11 Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you. Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil walks about like a roaring lion, seeking whom he may devour. Resist him, steadfast in the faith, knowing that the same sufferings are experienced by your brotherhood in the world. But may the God of all grace, who called us to His eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after you have suffered a while, perfect, establish, strengthen, and settle you. To Him be the glory and the dominion forever and ever. Amen.

Knowing What’s Real

Leave a Comment / June 13, 2013 October 7, 2015

My daughter was making a fruit pizza for a party she was attending. She even generously volunteered to make an extra one for us to eat. I love homemade snacks that I don’t have to make!

She went to the store and bought the ingredients and then came home to get to work. As I came into the kitchen she was looking at a jar of strawberry glaze she had purchased to spread on top of the pizzas. On the front were the words “Naturally Fresh”. The pleasant label caused us both to assume that the glaze was full of natural ingredients.

“Do you think this will be any good?” She wondered as she opened the jar, took a bit on a spoon, and tasted it.

She then handed me the spoon, “here, you taste it.”

Ugh. It was the most fake and disgusting” strawberry” flavor I have EVER tasted. It was just awful.

I picked up the jar and looked at the ingredient list. I immediately understood why it tasted so terrible. There was less than 2% of “natural and artificial flavors.” Instead of good and fresh ingredients, this red and sticky substance was made out of of high-fructose corn syrup, food starch, man-made chemicals and, of course, red dye.

That certainly was a good lesson in reading ingredients for both of us.

And it made me think of how often we Christians do this same thing with books and media, too. We will see the word “God” or “Christian” on the cover and naively purchase it. But instead of studying the contents, we just eat it right up, never even stopping to investigate if it is biblically correct.

As I walked through a Christian bookstore the other week, I was amazed at the number of books that had covers alluding to Christianity while containing themes that were completely unbiblical. With just a little investigating, I saw some that were just shallow and sugary and all about self. A select few were so philosophically off as to be very dangerous. And many were just self-help books couched in “Christianese”– very full of man’s wisdom, with little, if any, of God’s.

And then yesterday, I was listening to a Christian song on the radio. The voice singing was lovely and the tune was catchy but as I listened to the words, I realized that the message was completely unbiblical. This happens frequently. Christian music is often written by artists that care nothing for theology, and their lyrics show this clearly.

Now we can eat this stuff and it won’t kill us. But, just as that strawberry glaze is not good for our body’s system, so these unbiblical books and other things claiming to be Christian are not good for our spiritual system. We need to fill our bodies and our minds with healthy food. Only by studying God’s Word can we develop that proper grid for what is true and right.

We have a responsibility to bring good, healthy food into our homes and feed it to our families. But even greater than this responsibility is the one to bring good, healthy spiritual food into our homes. We should always stand guard against the fake. We need to keep our eyes open for the stuff that looks real, but isn’t real at all.

Let’s pay attention. We have to pay attention. We cannot let down our guard.

Oh, and on a side note, the fruit pizza was delicious without any glaze at all!

Wednesday Wisdom: Questions to Ask Your Mirror

1 Comment / June 12, 2013 April 8, 2015

I remember hearing a really great series by Nancy Leigh DeMoss on the controversial topic of modesty. I thought this may be a good time of year to remind us women what modesty means and so I headed over to Revive Our Hearts to see if there was anything written regarding this subject.

I’ve always thought I hold a pretty high standard, but as I read this article, I was challenged to remove some items of clothing occupying space in my closet. I hope that you have a heart yielded to God and His will as you read this helpful article, just in time for our summer wardrobes–

There’s no question about it. The decision to live your life for God’s glory will require some tough choices. It will probably take more time to shop, and your clothing may actually cost a little more.

You may not look as cool or “in” as you would like, and sometimes you just might have to stand out in a crowd as someone who is different. But remember, you are different. You have a different citizenship, and you were bought with a costly price!

As you evaluate your wardrobe, you’ll need courage to ask specific, practical questions, like these:

Is there writing (or pictures) on my clothing that emphasizes private parts of my body?
If someone were to look at me, where would their eyes naturally go—to my face, eyes, hips, thighs, breasts, etc.? Where do I want men looking when I come into view?
Is the fabric that I’m wearing too sheer? Could someone see through it to private parts of my body?
Am I wearing tight, form-fitting clothes? (A well-known designer once said, “Your clothing should be tight enough to show that you’re a woman, but loose enough to show that you’re a lady!”)
Do my pants fit correctly? Are they too tight? Do they cling to the hips, thighs, etc.?
Am I wearing anything provocative? (Today, underwear has become outerwear—often designed to be provocative. To expose undergarments is to tease men.)

As you examine individual items in your wardrobe, stand in front of a mirror. Bend forward and ask yourself, “Can I see private parts that a man (other than your husband, if you’re married) shouldn’t see?” If the answer is “yes,” you are dressed immodestly.

Look from all angles— front, back, and sides—while walking, sitting, moving, stretching, and bending. Remember, we often bend over to pick up packages or children, or to get into and out of a car. Ask yourself, “What will others notice and see? Where will others’ attention be drawn—towards breasts, hips, thighs, etc.? Why do I want to wear this outfit? Why do I like this style?”

Your heart attitude is key here. Ask the Lord to help you represent Him well. Ask for a teachable, open, obedient heart. If you’re married, ask your husband to help you understand what your clothes and appearance communicate to men. Ask him if your clothing is modest. If you’re not married, ask your father or an older woman these same questions.

Modesty Resolutions

Prayerfully consider, “Am I truly modest—according to God’s standard?” Then determine to be a woman after God’s own heart. Do you desire for your appearance to reveal a modest, godly heart?

If so, here are seven choices I challenge you to make:

Resolve to live to please God and to bring Him glory.
Yield (dedicate) your body to God. Say, “Lord, this body belongs to You.”
Resolve to be modest because that’s what pleases God.
Resolve to be pure (inwardly and outwardly).
Resolve never to dress in a way that could tempt men to have lustful thoughts.
Be willing to stand against the culture, whenever the culture is contrary to the Word and ways of God.
Be humble and open to the input of others.

Remember that it’s possible to have a modest outward appearance while having the heart of a Pharisee (critical, self-righteous, and judgmental towards those who do not see things the way you do). Modesty doesn’t mean that you have the corner on truth. Give God room and time to work in the lives of other people—don’t say, “Because I see it that way, that’s how it should be.” Remember, you’re not the Holy Spirit! Ask God to help you communicate modesty to others in a winsome way. Speak truth with a tender heart, compassion, and love.

Make the truth as attractive as possible.

-This article was written by Nancy Leigh DeMoss and can be found here, along with many other good articles.

Why I am not a fan of The Message

5 Comments / June 10, 2013 September 23, 2018

As I listened to a sermon the other day on Titus 2, I remembered just how unpopular that passage is with women. Just reading the verses can make some womens’ blood boil. I decided to look it up because so many Christians have done their best to explain these verses away, using cultural differences as the excuse. In fact, Bible translations like The Message change the words to make them more palatable. Just look at verses 3-5 of Titus 2 in each version–

the King James Version says–

3The aged women likewise, that they be in behaviour as becometh holiness, not false accusers, not given to much wine, teachers of good things;

⁴That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children,

⁵To be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.

And here is how The MESSAGE Bible translates that same passage–

Guide older women into lives of reverence so they end up as neither gossips nor drunks, but models of goodness. By looking at them, the younger women will know how to love their husbands and children, be virtuous and pure, keep a good house, be good wives. We don’t want anyone looking down on God’s Message because of their behavior.

Do you notice that they eliminated the word obedient completely? They also eliminated the purposeful action of older women teaching younger women. Instead of using the word admonish they turn it into a passive action of the younger women–they will know how by simply looking.

While similar to the KJV, The Message has eliminated an unpopular and unpolitically correct command –to be obedient to husbands — and also altered the biblically commanded relationship between older and younger women.

Let me make it clear here that I am not a “King James only” person. I have used it in this post because it is the most familiar text we have in the English language today. I use New King James for my personal study and have also studied from the ESV. I have heard that the NASB is also a reliable version, although I haven’t personally used it.

I truly believe that one of the ways that Satan is getting his foot in the door of many of our lives is through these watered down versions of the Bible we are using. Can God use a version like The Message to speak to you? Perhaps. But is it the best choice for our spiritual growth? I would say unequivocally that it is not.

Why not do your own study comparing different passages in The Message against a more reliable version if you still have doubts about what I am saying? I assure you that you will find many more examples like this if you are searching.

I know that translations like The Message are more readable and easier to understand, but they change the real message in many places. And don’t forget, if we are born again, we have the Holy Spirit to guide and instruct us as we read. We don’t need contemporary language and a culturally relevant version to help us understand.

May I suggest that you get a reliable version for your Bible Study? One that stays close to the original text and isn’t concerned with what the current culture or the modern-day church thinks?

I want you to know that this wasn’t even the topic I was planning on writing about today. But when I happened upon reading Titus 2 in these two translations of God’s Word, the differences were remarkable and disturbing. I felt compelled to bring it to your attention.

The world and even the church will tell you that it doesn’t matter which version you use as long as it is the Bible. I hope I showed you that it certainly does matter.

God bless you as you seek to grow in Him.

Revelation 22: 18-19 For I testify to everyone who hears the words of the prophecy of this book: If anyone adds to these things, God will add to him the plagues that are written in this book; and if anyone takes away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part from the Book of Life, from the holy city, and from the things which are written in this book.

Berry Lessons

2 Comments / June 6, 2013 June 6, 2013

I couldn’t help noticing the other night, as I picked strawberries, the incredible variety of sizes, shapes, and shades. No berry is alike. There are some that are small and misshapen and others that are large and picture perfect. Some are pinkish, others are bright red, and some are red on one side, while remaining a whitish green on the other. Some ripen a bit at a time while others seem to ripen quickly and completely. It is amazing that these ripe berries, no matter their size or shape, taste delicious.

That is unless they have matured while laying on the garden bed of dirt. Then it often gets too moist and they perish to mold and rot and insects. I throw countless berries away every year, as I will reach for a beautiful, bright red berry just to find that one side has rotted away or a hole has been bored into it by some insect. Berries like that, while appearing attractive at first glance, are good for nothing.

Oh my, how much like people these berries are. Just as there are all shapes and sizes of berries, so there are all shapes and sizes of people. Is a large, perfectly shaped berry better than a small, misshapen berry? The world would tell you that it is, but a berry is a berry and sometimes those small, misshapen berries taste better than the large ones. Of course, most of us prefer the pretty berries and anything that is not so pretty probably gets sent to the jam factory. But when you have your own patch (or pick your own at your local CSA) you realize that there are very few perfect berries in life. You also realize that it doesn’t really matter.

I get so frustrated at the narrow definition this culture has for beauty. You have to be a certain body shape (which 90% of us aren’t) and a certain height and weight. We are told that this nose is too small and that one is too large for there to be true beauty. That one is too long-waisted and this one’s hair too thin. Who in the world makes these rules, anyway? Is anyone else sick of being told what is beautiful by Hollywood and magazine editors?

The other thing that we should consider is that, just like every berry ripens in its own given time, so it is, too, with people. We have to be careful not to expect someone to be a mature Christian, when they are not at that point yet in their walk with Jesus Christ, showing themselves to still be a shade of pinkish-green instead of bright red. Oh, the frustration and damage that is caused by harsh judgement on and unrealistic expectations for baby believers. We need to be very, very careful about this.

We can’t control our body size and shape (I am referring here to our healthy size and shape, not overweight, which can be changed) and we can’t control how fast the people around us mature as believers, but there is something we can control–we can keep ourselves out of the dirt.

Laying in the dirt leads to mold and disease and insect infestation. As a new creature in Christ, we have the power through the work of the Holy Spirit, to keep ourselves up and out of the dirt and muck of the world. If we don’t do it, it is very likely that we will end up good for nothing, at least as far as Christianity and sharing the gospel is concerned.

So let’s stop worrying about the things we can’t change and let’s stop casting arrogant, unforgiving eyes on those around us, and let’s start focusing on the thing we can control–keeping ourselves out of the dirt.

And there you have it– a few lessons from the strawberry patch!

Wednesday Wisdom: The Church’s Power Over the World

Leave a Comment / June 5, 2013 June 5, 2013

I haven’t used one of my favorite authors on here for awhile. As I find in almost everything he writes, the following excerpt by A.W. Tozer seems like it could have been written yesterday rather than over fifty years ago. While some of the terms have changed over the years, I can’t help but wonder if this is even more relevant today than when it was written, if that is possible.

The world seems to possess a real genius for being wrong, even the educated world. We might just let that pass and go fishing except that we Christians happen to be living in the world and we have an obligation to be right—in everything, all of the time. We cannot afford to be wrong.

I can see how a right man might live in a wrong world and not be much affected by it except that the world will not let him alone. It wants to educate him. It is forever coming up with some new idea which, by the way, is usually an old idea dusted off and shined up for the occasion, and demanding that everyone, including the said right man, conform on pain of deep-seated frustration or a horrible complex of some kind.

Society, being fluid, usually moves like the wind, going all out in one direction until the novelty wears off or there is a war or a depression. Then the breeze sets another way and everyone is supposed to go along with it without asking too many question, though this constant change of direction should certainly cause the thoughtful soul to wonder whether anyone really knows what all the excitement is about after all.

Right now the zephyrs are blowing in the direction of social integration, sometimes also called social adjustment. According to this notion society is possessed of a norm, a sort of best-of-all-possible model after which we must all pattern ourselves if we want to escape sundry psychosomatic disorders and emotional upsets. The only safety for any of us is in becoming so well adjusted to the other members of society as to reduce the nervous and mental friction to a minimum. Education therefore should first of all teach adjustment to society. Whatever people happen to be interested in at the moment must be accepted as normal, and any nonconformity on the part of anyone is bad for the individual and harmful to everybody. Our highest ambition should be to become integrated to the mass, to lose our moral individuality in the whole.

However absurd this may appear when thus stated baldly it is nevertheless a fair description of the most popular brand of philosophy now engaging the attention of society. So many and so efficient are the media of mass communication that when the Brahmans of the educational world decide that it is time for the wind to change, the commonality quickly get the drift and swing obediently into the breeze. Anyone who resists is a kill-joy and a spoilsport, to say nothing of being old-fashioned and dogmatic.

Well, if to escape the charge of being dogmatic I must accept the changing dogmas of the masses, then I am willing to be known as a dogmatist and no holds barred. We who call ourselves Christians are supposed to be a people apart. We claim to have repudiated the wisdom of this world and adopted the wisdom of the cross as the guide of our lives. We have thrown in our lot with that One who while He lived on earth was the most unadjusted of the sons of men. He would not be integrated into society. He stood above it and condemned it by withdrawing from it even while dying for it. Die for it He would, but surrender to it He would not.

The wisdom of the cross is repudiation of the world’s “norm.” Christ, not society, becomes the pattern of the Christian life. The believer seeks adjustment, not to the world, but to the will of God, and just to the degree that he is integrated into the heart of Christ is he out of adjustment with fallen human society. The Christian sees the world as a sinking ship from which he escapes not by integration but by abandonment.

A new moral power will flow back into the Church when we stop preaching social adjustment and begin to preach social repudiation and cross carrying. Modern Christians hope to save the world by being like it, but it will never work. The Church’s power over the world springs out of her unlikeness to it, never from her integration into it. (emphasis mine)

—The Price of Neglect, A.W. Tozer

For the Graduating Seniors

2 Comments / June 3, 2013 May 31, 2017

One more child graduated from high school on Saturday. Three down –only one to go. Where in the world has the time gone? As I sat listening to the commencement speaker address the group of gifted kids that made up my daughter’s senior class, my mind started to wander (no reflection on the speaker–just on my easily distracted mind). What would I say if I had the opportunity to address these kids? Trust me, I am under no grand illusion that anyone will ever ask me to speak to a group of graduating seniors but it did make me wonder: What would I say to a group of kids ready to embrace life as an adult?

In some ways, it feels like just yesterday that I was the one hugging my friends, saying good-bye to favorite teachers, and smiling for the camera. But it wasn’t yesterday, it was a lifetime ago. And it is amazing what one learns in a lifetime. And so here it is in a nutshell–my commencement address to anyone who is finishing up an education, whether it be high school or college–

1. Develop a deep love for the Word of God. Let it function as your guide and help for the many tough decisions you will be facing. Make it your moral compass. Many has been the time that my husband and I have said to each other that we don’t know what we would do without the Bible. It truly is a source of comfort, strength, and guidance—like a solid rock amidst the crazy sea of life.

2. Who you marry matters–A LOT. It will make or break your life. Make a decision right now to only marry someone who not only says they are a believer, but actually lives like they are one. You will spare yourself much, much heartache in the long run. I have seen so many young people make the wrong assumption that the person they marry will eventually be saved or they will change that bad habit, but, while it does happen on occasion, it is much more likely that you will end up in a very difficult marriage. Choose wisely!

3. Make every decision with the desire to please the Lord. Whether it be the smallest thing (what movie am I going to see tonight?) or the largest (what career should I choose?), seek the Lord’s will. Rather than trying to gratify your temporal desires now, live with an eternal perspective. I’d like to say this gets easier as you get older, and while in some aspects it does, as long as we are on a fallen earth, this is difficult to do.

4. Don’t sweat the small stuff. Life has enough big stuff to work through without making the small stuff so significant. This one I have certainly learned (or shall I say continue to learn) firsthand. I have the personality that can get very easily distraught over something very trivial. It has taken many years –and still I sometimes catch myself doing it– to relinquish the worry and frustration over the stuff that just doesn’t matter in life. But I have learned that life is so much sweeter if you don’t let the small stuff get to you.

5. Feed your mind well. If you spend your nights watching mindless television shows that mock all things Christian, you will never grow as a believer. Do not accept the mindless entertainment of this culture but, instead, think deeply, and then teach that to your children. Choose a church that will help you to grow in your knowledge of biblical doctrine and in the application of God’s Word. And remember–just because something has a Christian label, doesn’t mean it is Christian. Do you remember that verse about Satan coming as an angel of light (2 Corinthians 11:14)? There are a lot of books, music, and other media that twist the truth just enough to be completely out of whack. Know the truth, so that you can spot the lies.

6. Whatever you do, do it well. Some of you know what path you are headed on and some of you are still trying to figure it out. As you choose to go a direction, sometimes God will close doors and make it clear He wants you somewhere else. But whatever job you happen to be in right now–wherever He leads you–do your work heartily, as unto the Lord and not to men (Colossians 3:23). This world desperately needs people with a good and honest work ethic. Be that kind of worker.

7. Feelings matter but the truth matters more. Be careful not to base your life on your feelings. This is especially hard in a culture where almost everything is based on feelings. You don’t feel like going to work? Just call in sick. You love that guy who doesn’t know the Lord? Just marry him. You don’t love that girl anymore? Just get divorced. You are depressed about having a baby? Just kill it. But God calls us to live righteously even when our feelings don’t agree. Your life will end up so much better –in the here and now and for eternity– if you follow this advice: Do what is right and don’t worry about your feelings.

8. Make people a priority. Material stuff is very enjoyable. I mean who doesn’t like a cool car or a new iPhone? But keep people more important than your stuff. Don’t get so wrapped up in texting or the world online that you miss the potential relationships right in front of you.

9. And, finally, stay humble enough to learn from those who have gone before you. Learning from the elderly is not “cool” in our culture. Youth, and all things young, are what it’s all about. But you will spare yourself much heartache if you take the time to ask godly men and women questions and then listen to their answers. Sure some of us older people can be downright irritating–we know it, too–but that is because we love you so much. Give us a break and don’t write us off completely because we have learned a lot and we would love to share it (at least most of us).

I know I will never have the opportunity to share this in front of a group of graduating seniors, but this is what I would say. I don’t mean any offense to the educational gurus out there, but let’s face it, by the time you are 35 or 40, no one cares where you went to school. In fact, they don’t even really care if you went to school. But they do see how you are living your life. Live a life dedicated to Jesus Christ and by doing so, go out and make a difference for Him. Live with conviction and integrity so that you will shine like a bright light in the midst of a very dark world. After all, that is what really matters.

How to Succeed in Business

6 Comments / May 30, 2013 May 30, 2013

Twenty-six years ago, a kid, just graduated from college, loaded a used John Deere riding mower on the back of his old pick-up truck and went to work. All these years later, that kid and his bride (my husband and I) have learned a fair amount about running a business. If you are interested in starting your own company or are in the process of starting your own company, you may find these suggestions worthwhile–

1. Have a thankful heart. We often joke around about how we had NO idea what we were doing all those years ago. Eric didn’t go into business to make money. He just did what he loved and what he believed the Lord was calling him to do. As his wife, I just went along for the ride. We didn’t pour over profit and loss statements or balance sheets. We probably should have done a bit more of that, but because we didn’t, we know that God has really protected and cared for us in this venture. We have seen Him work in marvelous ways–helping us to meet payroll or feed our family in the lean years. We try very hard to not take his grace and care for us for granted. A thankful heart, even in the midst of the hard times, is important.

2. Plan for the worst. We try very hard not to over-stretch ourselves financially. We know that at the whim of a culture or the downturn of the dollar, our whole business could change. We keep that in mind as we determine what debt to take out. Eventually, we are trying to work it down to zero, but that takes time. However, we have made some progress and can already see some rewards of our efforts to reduce debt.

3. Work hard. This sounds so simple, but we have noticed that there are so many who aren’t willing to put in the long hours necessary to get a business up and running. I think this is the main reason that we have been successful–because of my husband’s willingness to work hard (not mine–I don’t have near the same drive). Any success we have experienced is mostly because of the gift of hard work that God has instilled in Eric. We see so many people who want to go into business to make easy money. What they don’t realize is that the money doesn’t come easily at all and it takes a lot of hard, hard work and many, many hours. Especially those first five to ten years. Success can only be realized if you are willing to work hard.

4. Don’t sacrifice your family. One of the things I appreciated early on was Eric’s willingness to meet the needs of his family despite the long hours. He always (aside from crazy springtime) makes time to talk to me and the kids. He goes to sports games (most of the time) and plays basketball in the backyard. And, honestly, in our early years, one of the ways he did that was by following God’s command to keep the Sabbath holy. He kept Sundays work-free and our family is stronger because of it. Oh, don’t get me wrong–we did sacrifice as a family with dad’s long hours, but keeping the family a higher priority than the business is important for both the family and the business.

5. Don’t give up! Persevere through the tough times. I know sometimes people look at successful companies and assume that they just got lucky, but it’s not like that. At least it wasn’t for us. We have been through some very difficult times (and know that at any time we could go through them again). Eric just keeps going (and drags me with him, even when I feel like giving up!) He refuses to give up and that has benefited our business over and over again.

6. Treat your customers and employees like you would want to be treated. So often bosses treat others with condescension and harshness. We try very hard not to do that. Oh, we are not perfect, by any stretch of the imagination, but we want our employees and customers to know that they are valued as people to us and that we realize we would not be where we are today if not for them!

7. Follow God’s way as written in His Word. We sometimes get frustrated when we watch (or hear about) other company’s taking money “under the table”, lying on tax returns, and not getting the proper licenses or insurances. But, early on, as Christians, we made the choice to be on the “up and up” with everything we do and we have never regretted it. We can sleep at night because we know that we are doing things as God would want us to and that is what matters most.

8. Don’t get stuck in status quo. No matter what business you find yourself, it is constantly changing. Don’t stick your heels into the ground and determine to stay where you are. That is almost a sure way to kill your company. We have ebbed and flowed with various trends through the years. We have adjusted and changed and moved, all according to where the industry was going. We continue to do this.

9. Be Generous. Don’t hang on to any material blessing too tightly. Use what you have to further God’s Kingdom and to support and encourage Christian brothers and sisters.

10. To God be the Glory. Sure, we may have done some things right, but we have done a whole lot more wrong. But through it all we have tried to honor God. Any credit for any success goes to God alone. Along with that is the realization that any success is fleeting in the scope of life. We put our future in God’s hands and trust Him completely.

These are just a few of the lessons that we have learned and put into practice over the years. When I asked Eric to read over this, his first concern was that I was bragging too much on him. And maybe it does sound like that. I do have a lot of respect for this man who is my husband. However, much of what we have learned has been through much heartache, tears, and many arguments. It was a long and difficult road. My main desire here is to spare some of you the same grief we went through.

Many of you are not running companies, but many of these same principles can be applied to any job…any life. It is my prayer that these principles will be helpful to you, wherever you find yourself in life.

Wednesday Wisdom: Once Upon a Time

Leave a Comment / May 29, 2013 May 28, 2013

When writing about the breakdown of the family in Communist China back in the early 1960s, Valentin Chu made this observation:

“The family everywhere is a man’s source of strength and courage as well as his emotional harbor at times of natural disaster and personal misfortune. In China it was even more so. It was society itself. The Chinese communists were acutely aware that their control of the people could never be effective unless the monolithic family system was destroyed, along with religion and conventional morals.”

Can you destroy the family without destroying pure religion and morals right along with it? Consider Mr. Chu’s words as you read the following excerpt–

Once upon a time, men were men, women were women, and both seemed to not only be okay with this, but they liked it quite a lot. More than a lot. They loved it. And they loved each other. All in a manner approved by the Southern Baptist Convention, of course.

Consequently, they loved their life. All of it. Not all of the time, maybe, but close enough to seem crazy from a contemporary perspective.

These men and women would come together to build homes; not the brick or wood kind, but the people kind. They would then seek to have and raise children. Many children. As many as they could have…and then they’d want more.

They loved their homes.

They loved their children.

They loved their God, and it was their love of and devotion to this God that had made all the rest of it possible. Life was good.

Older family members were lovingly tended to and taken care of by the younger. Their wisdom was treasured. Little boys and little girls basked in the glow of their stories, experience, and hard-earned depth.

They all lived, loved and laughed together.

They even ate together.

Are you feeling sick yet?

Is this all just a little too Little House on the Prairie for you? Or maybe a lot?

Don’t sweat it; that’s a normal reaction to the sight of God’s plan for families in action from a contemporary secular perspective. It happens all the time. It’s called “improper emotion sickness,” and while Dramamine doesn’t do much for this form of disorientation, there is a solution, so try to relax. We’ll get to it shortly.

This is just a hyper-Rockwellian fantasy spin on history, you might be thinking. But you’d be wrong. And I think you know it already. I think that we all do. All Common Believers, anyway.

We all know that God gave us something of matchless beauty and power in His ordination of the family, and that we, as we tend to do with every good and precious thing entrusted to our care, have profoundly trashed it in every way imaginable (and then some). So we like to pretend that those vivid, detailed family pictures painted in His perfect Word are completely detached from reality; rendered impossible by the “more factual” representation dictated by the prevailing views of the time in which we now live. We’d never say it out loud—God’s Word being “completely detached from reality”—but we definitely think it. And we act accordingly.

We divorce at rates in perfect harmony with the openly anti-Christian folk roaming the landscape. We pursue relationships and romance in the same distinctly unbiblical manners so highly esteemed and advocated by the culture. We know that homosexuality might technically be a problem, but we love Will & Grace. We value children like the culture, meaning: We murder and defend the right to murder innocent babies just as the world does.

When we do let them live, we abdicate our responsibility to raise and educate our children, instead shipping them off to government-controlled schools for Christ-less “education.”

We define success just as the world does, exalting the pursuit of careers, education, titles, cars, and houses well above the pursuit of a large and growing Bible-centered and happy home.

In short, we are the world. There is no discernable, substantive difference. So what is the solution to all of these profound problems and “improper emotion sickness” too?

Is it a new ten- or twelve-step program?

Maybe a cool set of acronyms to help you memorize a new ten or twelve step program?

Could it be a cool new hip and relevant ministry aimed at helping you realize your best family now by repainting your Christian faith with a bluesy, jazzy new perspective?

Nope.

It’s just the Bible. Sorry folks; that’s the only real thing I’ve got to offer here. (And no, I’m not really sorry at all…and you won’t be either.)

Buss, Scott Alan (2011-09-25). Fire Breathing Christians, R3VOLUTION Press. Kindle Edition.

This is the first time since I have started writing the Wednesday Wisdom post each week that I have used the same book two weeks in a row. I am about half-way through Fire-Breathing Christians, the Common Believer’s Call to Reformation, Revival, and Revolution. I find myself wishing that every Christian would read this book. In a rather quirky and very readable writing style, the author educates the reader on many of the unbiblical teachers and movements of the modern-day church, using God’s Word as his grid.