Holiness

Born to Stand Out

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Yesterday, when I was going through some old things, I came across a little jar of buttons my mom had given me a long time ago. When I was a child, my grandmother had a big basket of buttons I used to love and this jar was a little sampling of them.

I hadn’t thought of that button basket in a very long time, but my mind went back to that basket yesterday. Its home was the shelf of a large hutch that sat in the back of the main room of my grandparents’ house. In front of the hutch was a little table. I remember sitting there, sorting and playing with those buttons on many occasions.

Many of the buttons were drab and nondescript, some were pretty colors but plain and round, and then there were the special ones– heart or flower-shaped and brightly-colored. These were my very favorite buttons. They were the ones that I would search for every single time.

As my mind wandered in the past, I suddenly realized that the world is really just like that button basket.

Most unbelievers, like those drab buttons that made up most of the basket, are living life and leaving no mark on eternity. They are self-absorbed and focused on pleasing themselves. And then there are the pretty-colored, plain ones–these represent the unbelievers who are doing many good things for the world before they leave it.  But it is we Christians who should be the heart and flower-shaped buttons. We should stand out among the world by our love, by our holiness, by our godly choices, and by our actions in an incomparable manner, because we have the Holy Spirit living within us.

Only most of us don’t really want to stand out. We find it easier and even more pleasant to just fit in.

Oh, most of us Christians don’t mind looking like those pretty buttons that do some good in the world. That’s okay because it’s very acceptable. But we don’t want to change our shape, because that means we can be spotted and teased and mocked and persecuted. And we don’t really want that.

Of course, if this is how we feel, then we must ask ourselves: Do I really understand salvation?

Having a bold witness, choosing holiness, and standing up for Jesus Christ are born out of the love we feel for God because of the great grace and mercy we have been shown by Him. Our transformed life is born out of the humility, sinfulness, and utter unworthiness that we bring to the cross as we kneel there, begging for forgiveness and new life in Christ. This new life is born out of the understanding that we owe everything to Christ and are no longer our own master.

When we truly understand salvation, standing out isn’t a decision. For, of course, we will. For what else could we choose?

My savior died for me and so I will live for Him.

The brand of Christian so prevalent today isn’t doing anything of the sort. I don’t know if that means they aren’t saved at all or if they just don’t truly understand salvation (it is probably some of both) but what I do know is that it is confusing the world around us as to what being a Christian really means. It is giving the impression that Jesus is here to give me a better life on earth and some fire insurance for the hereafter. This unbiblical teaching has seeped its way into even the most conservative churches and it is hurting the Gospel.

So what to do?

We choose to live out biblical Christianity in our own little world. We choose to be brave and courageous as others falter and try to hide. We live a holy life, making even the smallest choice with a mind to please God. We speak the truths of scripture but always with love, kindness, and humility– even when we passionately disagree with someone. And we exude the joy and peace of our God in the midst of these dark, troublesome days. In living out biblical Christianity right where God has placed us, we will stand out like one of those brightly-colored and beautifully-shaped buttons. It matters not that we are standing out alone, for this is what we are called to do.

It reminds me of a saying I once heard in a secular movie–

Why are you trying so hard to fit in, when you were born {or re-born} to stand out?

I leave you with these words from I Peter 1:13-25. I hope these words will instill you with the desire to please our heavenly Father and to do so with courage, no matter what other Christians are doing around us–

 Therefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and rest your hope fully upon the grace that is to be brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ; 14 as obedient children, not conforming yourselves to the former lusts, as in your ignorance; 15 but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in all your conduct, 16 because it is written, “Be holy, for I am holy.”[c]

17 And if you call on the Father, who without partiality judges according to each one’s work, conduct yourselves throughout the time of your stay here in fear; 18 knowing that you were not redeemed with corruptible things, like silver or gold, from your aimless conduct received by tradition from your fathers, 19 but with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot. 20 He indeed was foreordained before the foundation of the world, but was manifest in these last times for you 21 who through Him believe in God, who raised Him from the dead and gave Him glory, so that your faith and hope are in God.

22 Since you have purified your souls in obeying the truth through the Spirit[d] in sincere love of the brethren, love one another fervently with a pure heart, 23 having been born again, not of corruptible seed but incorruptible, through the word of God which lives and abides forever,[e] 24 because

“All flesh is as grass,
And all the glory of man[f] as the flower of the grass.
The grass withers,
And its flower falls away,
25 But the word of the Lord endures forever.”[g]

Now this is the word which by the gospel was preached to you.

 

Our Most Treacherous Enemy

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There are few things that affect our love for God and our growth as a believer more than our love for self. For out of that many (if not all) sins are born. The world and even the church are telling us these days just how important it is that we love ourselves. We are told that we cannot experience success in any area of life unless we do.

And, yet, is this what the Bible teaches?

Of course not. In fact, if we are a true believer, we recognize that we are our own worst enemy, no matter what the world (and worldly preachers) tell us. But if we have been in the faith for awhile, we may begin to think that we are winning our battle against self-love. We compare ourselves to the world around us and, in comparison to that, we look pretty good. But therein is the issue, is it not? We are to compare ourselves to the Word of God, not to sinners around us.

If you prefer to continue believing that you are winning your battle against self, then I’d encourage you to stop reading now. The essay below, written by Richard Baxter, a puritan from the mid-1600s, will quench that thought in a heartbeat. I share it here to challenge and convict. To cause you to think and to grow. I was dismayed to realize just how very selfish I still am, but also encouraged to know that I am less selfish now than I was twenty years ago. And I guess that’s how life is, isn’t it? No perfection this side of glory, but slow and steady progress as we work our way there. I hope that you are challenged–but also encouraged–by this essay–

SELF-DENIAL

“If anyone would come after Me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow Me.” Luke 9:23

You hear ministers tell you of the odiousness and danger and sad effects of sin; but of all the sins that you ever heard of, there is scarce any more odious and dangerous than selfishness; and yet most are never troubled at it, nor sensible of its malignity. My principal request therefore to you is, that as ever you would prove Christians indeed, and be saved from sin and the damnation which follows it—take heed of this deadly sin of selfishness, and be sure you are possessed with true self-denial; and if you have, see that you use and live upon it.

And for your help herein, I shall tell you how your self-denial must be tried. I shall only tell you in a few words, how the least measure of true self-denial may be known: wherever the interest of carnal self is stronger and more predominant habitually than the interest of God, of Christ, of everlasting life, there is no true self-denial or saving grace; but where God’s interest is strongest, there self-denial is sincere. If you further ask me how this may be known, briefly thus:

1. What is it that you live for? What is that good which your mind is principally set to obtain? And what is that end which you principally design and endeavor to obtain, and which you set your heart on, and lay out your hopes upon? Is it the pleasing and glorifying of God, and the everlasting fruition of Him? Or is it the pleasing of your fleshly mind in the fruition of any inferior thing? Know this, and you may know whether self or God has the greatest interest in you. For that is your God which you love most, and please best, and would do most for.

2. Which do you most prize—the means of your salvation and of the glory of God, or the means of providing for self and flesh? Do you more prize Christ and holiness, which are the way to God—or riches, honor, and pleasures, which gratify the flesh? Know this, and you may know whether you have true self-denial.

3. If you are truly self-denying, you are ordinarily ruled by God, and His Word and Spirit, and not by the carnal self. Which is the rule and master of your lives? Whose word and will is it ordinarily that prevails? When God draws, and self draws—which do you follow in the tenor of your life? Know this, and you may know whether you have true self-denial.

4. If you have true self-denial, the drift of your lives is carried on in a successful opposition to your carnal self, so that you not only refuse to be ruled by it, and love it as your god—but you fight against it, and tread it down as your enemy. So that you go armed against self in the course of your lives, and are striving against self in every duty. And as others think—it then goes best with them, when self is highest and pleased best; so you will know that then it goes best with you—when self is lowest, and most effectually subdued.

5. If you have true self-denial, there is nothing in this world so dear to you, but on deliberation you would leave it for God. He who has anything which he loves so well that he cannot spare it for God, is a selfish and unsanctified wretch. And therefore God has still put men to it, in the trial of their sincerity, to part with that which was dearest to the flesh. Abraham must be tried by parting with his only son. And Christ makes it His standing rule, “Any of you who does not give up everything he has, cannot be my disciple” (Luke 14:33).

Yet it is true that flesh and blood may make much resistance in a gracious heart; and many a striving thought there may be, before with Abraham we part with a son, or before we can part with wealth or life; but yet on deliberation, self-denial will prevail. There is nothing so dear to a gracious soul, which he cannot spare at the will of God, and the hope of everlasting life. If with Peter we would flinch in a temptation—we should return with Peter in weeping bitterly, and give Christ those lives that in a temptation we denied Him.

6. In a word, true self-denial is procured by the knowledge and love of God, advancing Him in the soul—to debasing of self. The illuminated soul is so much taken with the glory and goodness of the Lord, that it carries him out of himself to God, and as it were estranges him from himself, that he may have communion with God. This makes him vile in his own eyes, and to abhor himself in dust and ashes. It is not a stoical resolution, but the love of God and the hopes of glory—which make him throw away the world, and look contemptuously on all below, so far as they are mere provision for flesh.

Search now, and try your hearts by these evidences, whether you are possessed of this necessary grace of self-denial. O make not light of the matter! For I must tell you that self is the most treacherous enemy, and the most insinuating deceiver in the world! It will be within you when you are not aware of it and will conquer you when you perceive not yourselves much troubled with it. Of all other vices, selfishness is both the hardest to find out and the hardest to cure. Be sure therefore in the first place, that you have self-denial; and then be sure you use it and live in the practice of it.

Published by gracegems.org. If you have enjoyed this (and others like it that I have shared on the Growing4Life Facebook page), then I encourage you to get on their e-mail list.

Just How Big is God?

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Do you know how many different rabbits there are nibbling at your garden? Could we possibly know how many leaves are on all of the trees in California? Or what is the exact number of plankton in the ocean? Just how many children are there in the world that do not have a safe and loving home? Or exactly how many people are going to get wonderful, life-changing news today?

Does anyone know the answer to these questions?

Yes!

What about questions from the past–like what caused Hitler and Stalin to grow up with such maniacal evil embedded in their hearts? Or what exactly was going through the mind of missionaries such as Gladys Aylward and David Livingstone as they traveled to mission fields that were completely heathen and utterly unknown? Or what about our questions about our own personal pasts–such as questions about abusers and favoritism and broken relationships. Or the solutions to the puzzles and mysteries that surround the people we love that remain unanswered.

Does anyone know the answer to these questions and mysteries?

Yes!

What about the burning questions of the future many of us are considering right now– What is going to happen to our country? How bad is it going to get? What kind of world will our children and grandchildren grow up in? Will Christ come and rapture us anytime soon?

Does anyone know the answer to these questions?

Yes!

GOD KNOWS.

Now before we dismiss this gigantic thought, let’s let it sink into our brains just a bit. God knows everything. He is not limited by time or space. He is not limited by equations or natural laws. He knows all things at all times. He has known all things from the beginning of time and knows what is to come for eternity. He knows every insignificant detail about everything. He knows what every molecule in the universe is doing at this very moment. Everything.

God has been teaching me this over the past month or so. A few weeks ago, I had the privilege of attending Pastor Dean’s Bible Study (my brother). I only wish I lived close enough to go every week. He is currently doing a study on the Doctrine of God. In just a short hour, I realized that although I already had a big view of God, it really wasn’t big enough.

And then, a week or two later, as I was reading from the Gospel of Matthew (my pastor has given the congregation a 2016 Read through the Gospels schedule and I am enjoying it immensely!), I came across these verses in Matthew 10, which confirmed what I was already beginning to realize–

Are not two sparrows sold for a copper coin? And not one of them falls to the ground apart from your Father’s will. 30 But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. 31 Do not fear therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.

Now think about this. Really think about this. Not one sparrow falls that God doesn’t know about. It doesn’t say not one in this city or not one in this country but not one.

This is just how big our God is.

What He writes in His word is true. What He does is perfect. His plan is best.

So often we try to create a God that makes sense to us. We want Him to see things like we do and to respond and react like we would. Our impression of how God handles things is based on our human and flawed sense of fairness.

When something doesn’t seem fair to us or we come to something like the doctrine of election and free will, we become very frustrated that we can’t understand. Some throw their hands in the air and walk away, saying God mustn’t exist. Or this isn’t the kind of God I want to serve.

I’d like to share with you an example given by Pastor Dean that really helped me to find a little perspective in this.

Let’s say we try to teach our 3 year old child (or grandchild) about Calculus. However, they are just not mature enough yet to grasp such a complex subject. Now will that three year old look at you with disgust and say, “If I don’t understand this, then it just can’t be true!” No, he won’t do this because he trusts you–the person in his life who cares for him. He will trust that you know what you are talking about even if he is incapable of understanding it.

Doesn’t this give added insight to these verses–

and {Jesus} said, “Assuredly, I say to you, unless you are converted and become as little children, you will by no means enter the kingdom of heaven. Therefore whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.” (Matthew 18:3-4)

To truly understand salvation means casting aside our arrogance and belief that we can know everything that God knows. That we can understand everything God understands. It means trusting in our Heavenly Father even when we can’t understand. Especially when we can’t understand.

Somehow as we grow into adults many of us believe we should be able to understand everything about God. And yet the gulf between a child’s brain and adult’s brain is microscopic compared to the gulf between God’s understanding and our understanding.

If we can truly begin to grasp this, then how we look at all of life changes. It changes how we approach the Word of God. It changes how we pray. It changes how we view sin. And how we view salvation.

God is more than we could ever think. Bigger than we could ever imagine. More powerful than we could dream. This shouldn’t only make us feel safe and secure, but should drive us to humble ourselves before His throne, declaring ourselves to be unworthy of His grace and mercy.

Our perception of God truly changes everything.

 

 

Seeing Ourselves As We Really Are

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Would you know what you look like if you didn’t have access to a mirror? We can hardly even imagine not having a mirror available anywhere. But just think on this with me for the next few minutes, if you will–

The era is around World War II–late 30s or early 40s. The town is London. The girl is born with a club foot. Her cruel mother hates her and thinks the girl is cursed by the devil. Because of this, the mother tries desperately to hide the girl from the world and refuses to let her leave their drab, one-room apartment. In that room she has lived her whole, short life and she sits at the tiny, lone window all day, watching the world go by below her.

One day she decides to try to teach herself to walk. It is very painful and such a struggle, but she does it! She can walk across the room. And it’s a good thing, too, because finally, one day she and her little brother are given an opportunity to escape. They board a train bound for the country and head towards freedom.

On the way there, the train stops and the kids get off the train to use the bathroom. As she limps to the sink in the unfamiliar room, there seems to be another girl washing her hands in another sink right in front of her. She is shocked at just how ugly the girl is. She is by far the nastiest, dirtiest girl she has ever seen. Her hair is knotted and unkempt. Her clothing is filthy and ripped. And then she notices the girl imitating her and she gasps. That isn’t just another girl from the train. It is her! She is looking in a mirror and the ugly girl is herself.

She has come face to face with how she truly looks and it isn’t a pretty sight.

This story is not from a Christian book and there is no indication that the author is a believer, but this part of her book helped me understand this passage from James in a whole new light–

But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man observing his natural face in a mirror; for he observes himself, goes away, and immediately forgets what kind of man he was (James 1:22-24).

When we read the Bible, we are just like that girl looking in the mirror for the first time. We, too, get a glimpse of our true self–the sinful, dark, ugly side we’d prefer to ignore. And yet, James indicates that many of us look in that mirror and then just walk away. Why is this? I think there are two reasons, which really end up being the same thing in slightly different packages–

1. We are prideful and self-righteousness.

Pride, in essence, keeps the mirror hazy. Have you ever seen a window when the sun shines on it? What looked clean in the darkness looks positively filthy in the sunlight. Pride is that darkness that keeps us from seeing the filth. When we read the Word, some of us honestly believe we are good people and that we are making a pretty good go of this thing called “life”. We don’t really need a Savior because we don’t believe we are really that big of a sinner.

2. We love our sin.

In order for us to be changed by the Word, we need to be willing to obey the Word. This is a very tall order because it affects every aspect of our lives. We can’t approach the Word with a willing heart, because we are not willing to put what God wants ahead of what we want. Looking in that mirror will require some very painful and sacrificial change. And we don’t want it. It hurts too much. So we go on in with our devotions and Bible reading but it really never changes us because we love our sin too much and are not willing to part with it.

Both of these can be boiled down into one concept: Self-Love. We love ourselves far too much to be too fazed by the mirror of the Word.

And so many who read the Bible never change. They are the same person from year to year. And this is who James talks about–the ones who are hearing but never doing. The ones who are reading but never changing.

And this is why we need to check our hearts before we come to the Word. True and lasting change is only possible if we approach the Word of God with a heart of submission and a willingness to obey. An unyielding, prideful heart will reap no fruit from time spent in the Word.

It has been a challenge for me to think about how I approach the Word. Am I willing to see the real me? And am I willing to do whatever it takes to give up the sins that I love–whether they be how I entertain myself, how I eat, what I wear, or how I react to people when I don’t get my way?

If I can answer yes! to these two questions, then the wonderful hope in God’s Word is that we are not alone in our battle against sin. God has given us the Holy Spirit to help us. Romans 1:9-11 puts it this way–

But you are not in the flesh but in the Spirit, if indeed the Spirit of God dwells in you. Now if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he is not His. 10 And if Christ is in you, the body is dead because of sin, but the Spirit is life because of righteousness. 11 But if the Spirit of Him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, He who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through His Spirit who dwells in you.

Life is not filled with hopeless battles that we can never win. Victory can be ours but only if we are willing to look at ourselves honestly. Victory can be ours but only if we are willing to cast aside the sins that we love.

If we do can do these two things by the grace and mercy of God, then– and only then– will we become doers of the Word, and not hearers only.

Mixed Signals

 

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Did you ever date someone who gave you mixed signals? I had a few experiences like that. They would say they didn’t want to date me, but then their actions would not match their statement. I am sure many of us had to work our way through those mixed signals given to us by the opposite sex in our dating years.

Unfortunately, mixed signals are quite common when it comes to the world of religion, as well. Have you ever been around one of those people that claims to be a Christian but doesn’t live it? They don’t only claim to be one, but they use all the right vocabulary when they talk about religion, sprinkling their conversations with a generous amount of Bible verses and good-sounding theology.

Meanwhile, their lives are filled with all of the things God hates with no conviction to change. They look just like the world in almost every way and defend it as acceptable in the eyes of God.

They are what we would generally call a “hypocrite.”

Hypocrite: : a person who claims or pretends to have certain beliefs about what is right but who behaves in a way that disagrees with those beliefs

Last night my daughter was telling me about a young TV star who presents quite the confusing Instagram. She claims to be a Christian, but on her page she posts verses alongside almost pornographic images of herself. While this is a blatant example of hypocrisy, this is not uncommon among movie stars and athletes.

But it isn’t just movie stars and athletes that are hypocrites. There are plenty around. I am sure you can think of at least one right now.

And these hypocrites can really wreak havoc when we are trying to share the good news of the gospel.  Their lack of holy living, their arrogance, and their disinterest in interpreting the Word of God correctly can really be stumbling blocks for many people. They do an immense amount of damage for the cause of Jesus Christ. And it can be frustrating for those of us who are really trying to live out a godly life and share the good news with others.

So what do we do about these folks giving mixed signals?

These are the folks that are living in sin, so while some confrontation may be in order, you have to decide very carefully if it should come from you. If you do decide it should, make sure your heart is brimming over with love for that person.

But if you don’t believe you should be the one confronting the person, then what can you do with all of the damage this person is doing by their mixed signals?

I would make a few suggestions–

  1.  Keep striving to live a holy, godly life. The seeds we plant will yield fruit in the future. And people will see that fruit. They will see the fruit of the hypocrite and they will see the fruit of the one who was dedicated whole-heartedly to God. Just keep doing what’s right.
  2. When these names come up in your conversations about salvation with others, point their eyes away from the hypocrite and to the Word of God. As believers, Jesus is our perfect example. We need to keep our eyes on Him and get them off of people– whether they be sincere Christians who struggle with sin (of which I am one) or blatant hypocrites.
  3. Pray for the hypocrite. Pray that God would open his or her eyes so that they could see the truth of God’s Word. So often we express frustration or irritation with someone, but we rarely will pray for that person. And, honestly, it is actually pretty hard to pray for someone who is making your life more difficult, so that does make sense. But praying for someone not only helps them, but also changes your heart–filling it with genuine love from the Father for this person.

While it seems that hypocrites are increasing by leaps and bounds in this current age, I doubt this is a new problem. Wherever you find freedom of religion and a pop culture that includes Christianity, you will find hypocrites. After all, you won’t be a hypocrite if you know your freedom–sometimes even your very life– is on the line. I guess that would probably be the one bright spot in being part of the persecuted church. No fakers there.

But, while persecution is probably coming to the Western world sooner rather than later, in the meantime we need to not only put up with hypocrites, but try to genuinely love them, praying that the blinders would be lifted from their eyes.

 

A Romp Through the Thicket

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Last Sunday night was a beautiful autumn evening. We hadn’t changed the clocks yet and so the sun sat low on the horizon as we stared at the breath-taking fall sky. We decided we had enough light remaining to take a short walk along the path we have behind our house. Our two dogs danced excitedly at our feet as it dawned on them what we had decided to do.

I have never seen a dog smile, but when we take our dogs for a walk I sometimes think I almost see them smiling. They are never happier than when they are exploring the pathway ahead of us. We think nothing of it and let them wander to their heart’s content, while we walk and talk.

Surrounding the path are corn fields,woods, and brush, with lots of places for our small dog, Belle, to explore that our Lab could never reach. And this particular evening Belle decided to follow her nose into the deepest parts of the thicket.

She is a dog, so she has no capacity to stop and think: Is this wise?

Which is too bad, for dangers abound in the thicket.

Hours later, while we were watching football, my daughter had Belle on her lap. Suddenly she cried out in dismay, “There’s a tick! And another one! And another one!”

My husband and I walked over to take a look. Sure enough, there were several small black things with legs that looked suspiciously like the dreaded disease-carriers.

Ugh. I hate those things.

How thankful I am for a husband who will do the honors of removing ticks (and splinters!) and so I found him a tweezers and he started removing the ticks.

Within a few moments, he had removed eleven of them!

Along with the ticks, he found several harmless burrs clinging tightly to her chin that were making it hard for her to open her mouth.

This romp through the thicket had been more costly than most.

The next day I gave her a bath and found one more tick lodged at her eye. I gathered my courage (is that what it’s called when you do something you absolutely don’t want to do?) and removed it myself. A dozen ticks in all.

At first, we thought they were deer ticks because they were so much smaller than the normal ticks we normally find around here. But after doing some googling and then later talking to the vet, we came to the conclusion that it must have been a nest full of just-hatched dog ticks.

As I bathed her, I thought of the possibilities of lyme or another tick-born disease. She seems fine, but now we will be watching her to make sure. But it seems unlikely (thankfully!), as they were not deer ticks and they are the ones that usually carry the disease.

So why I am telling you about my dog’s romp in the thicket?

Because we so often do the same thing!

We Christians will be traversing the straight and narrow and doing pretty well, too. But then something distracts us to our right or left. Or sometimes behind us. And we stray off the path.

We do have the capacity to ask ourselves: Is this wise? But, normally, that is not the question we are asking ourselves. No, our question often centers more around our selfish desires and whims and looks more like this: Do I want this?

Since we have a whole culture encouraging us to do what makes us happy, we consider that the blessing of man and move off the path into sin.

But how rarely we come away unscathed.

Some of us will get away with a few harmless burrs. Others will find a tick or two clinging to them. An unfortunate few will give their lives for their whims and come down with some terminal disease. At the very least, our clean, snow-white garments will become stained, torn, and dirty and the name of Jesus disgraced.

While sin looks like a blast, it rarely is. And the ironic thing is that while we chase after our happiness, leaving the path of righteousness to chase after things of the flesh (see Galatians 5:19-21 below), we really are eroding our only opportunity of true joy and happiness, which is to follow God with all of our heart, soul, mind, and strength (Mark 12:30).

Psalm 16:11 puts it this way–You will show me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; At Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.

Following our own path does not lead us to joy and, more likely than not, will lead us to heartache.

I am truly amazed at the amount of people who call themselves Christians and yet regularly commit these sins, without conviction and generally defending them to be acceptable, listed in Galatians 5: 19-21: Now the works of the flesh are evident, which are: adultery,  fornication, uncleanness, lewdness, 20 idolatry, sorcery, hatred, contentions, jealousies, outbursts of wrath, selfish ambitions, dissensions, heresies, 21 envy, murders, drunkenness, revelries, and the like; of which I tell you beforehand, just as I also told you in time past, that those who practice such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.

As if somehow these are no longer really sins.

As if God has changed.

But God hasn’t changed. And we are to avoid these things. Not only to please God but also to protect ourselves.

My pastor said something so profound yesterday about this whole topic of sin in our lives. It is something we should all consider as we leave the path of holiness and righteousness to chase after our dreams in the thicket:

Holiness always comes before joy and happiness.

Always.

Compromise with the world will not lead to happiness. Sleeping with that co-worker will not make us happy. Getting a different husband or wife will not make us happy. Getting drunk will not make us happy. Neither will cheating on our taxes, lying to stay out of trouble, or filling our minds with ungodly entertainment.

But following God whole-heartedly? Staying on the straight and narrow path? That is how we experience true joy and happiness.

Which is such a wonderful truth, isn’t it? God has designed it so that, in pleasing Him in all that we do, we actually are at our most joyous, happiest selves. True believers are not sad that they can’t join the world or participate in all its “fun” because we see it for what it is.

I love that God loves us and cares enough about us to bring us true peace and joy in following hard after Him. What a gracious and kind God we serve.

So let’s stay far from the thicket. Whatever beckons from the deep underbrush will never be worth the price we pay for it. Instead let’s keep our feet on the path of righteousness, living a life of godliness and purity, setting a glowing example for those who are following after us.

 

 

Why Are We Losing Our Kids?

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One of the most frightening things about being a Christian parent is the big question mark that lies at the “official” end of our training time. The bags are packed, we say our good-byes, and we watch the car drive away while the question is ever-present in our minds, demanding attention. Will our kids follow Jesus?

And so often today the answer to that question is no. So many good Christian families are losing their kids these days. Over the past ten years, I have watched many parents grieve the choices of their teens and twenty-somethings. A few of these kids come back to the faith, but most don’t.

So why are we Christians losing our kids? While there probably isn’t just one answer to this question, I whole-heartedly believe that it does have a great deal to do with one thing, in particular.

Christians are having a love affair with the world.

We love the world. Oh, yes, we do. Ask any Christian these days what they are listening to, watching, and doing on the weekends, and you will see that many of them do the exact same things as the rest of the world.

In the old days, we would be taught that to love the world is sinful and that in order to be holy, we must love the things God loves and hates the things God hates. We were taught to separate ourselves from the world and to be different. We were to stand out among unbelievers in a noticeable way. These sermons, books, and lessons were based on the plentiful scriptures about the dangers of loving the world and the stark contrast of worldly and holy living: Romans 12:1-2; James 4:4; I John 2:15-16; John 15:19; John 17:14; 2 Corinthians 6:17; Titus 2:11-12; I Peter 1:14-16; I Peter 4:3-4; I John 2:16. And while people still struggled with loving the world, they knew it was wrong to do so.

Fast forward thirty or so years. Worldliness is not only not taught against, it is actually encouraged! We are told in many of our churches that we need to be like the world to reach the world (if you spend any time in God’s Word at all, you will recognize this for the blatant lie that it is). We are told that to have standards is equal to being legalistic. And that to not allow our kids to attend school dances or R-rated movies means that they will be too sheltered and won’t understand the world. As if somehow we will become better witnesses for Jesus by participating in the debauchery of the culture. We are told that things like bikinis and gambling and drinking alcohol and entertainment aren’t any big deal and that to have standards about these things is completely unnecessary.

And while we listen to this garbage that is surely found nowhere in scripture, Satan is stealing the hearts of our kids.

Think with me for just a moment.

If our kids are listening almost 24/7 to music that glorifies sex, drugs, and violence, should we expect them to follow hard after Jesus?

If our kids are watching horrid violence, sexual perversions of all types, and hearing abundant bad language on the screens that are before their eyes, should we expect them to have a vibrant faith?

If our children want to be like the world and we don’t discourage this (and many times even encourage them)– by how they dress, what they attend, and who they hang out with– should we really be surprised when they find holiness and reading God’s Word boring and unnecessary?

Really?

And I would add here that, as parents, we are often so tempted to want to be cool and hip to our kids. We don’t want to be that downer parent who doesn’t let our kids do what everyone else is doing, so many of us– even if we don’t really feel a peace about what is going on– will capitulate to the begging and the demands.

In fact, many of us take it a step further and in trying so hard to be the cool parents, we ourselves ignore God’s commands for purity and holiness. We wear immodest clothing, watch sinful movies and TV programs on a regular basis, and tune our radios to music that is anything but godly– all in the name of being “cool”.

And I get it. It is tempting. I have been the mother of teenagers. In fact, I still am. It is so very hard to stand your ground when all the world– and even most of the “church”– is telling you to relax and just go with the flow.

And if we Christian parents aren’t trying to be cool, we are often at the other end of the spectrum, burying our heads in denial. Look, I don’t care if your kids go to public school, Christian school, or are home-schooled, they are going to run into bad kids. They are going to be given pornography website addresses and they are going to be offered horrible, ungodly advice. They will have classmates who cut themselves, are addicts, or struggle with eating disorders. They are going to deal with threats, bullies, and unkind adults. They are going to deal with temptations and circumstances that we can’t even imagine. We need to help them! The need is urgent. Burying our heads in the sand at this moment could mean spiritual death for our kids!

Let’s teach them that we find our standards in God’s Word and this is what we base our life upon. Let’s live what we are teaching them. And then let’s be a safe place that they can go to share their worries and concerns. Don’t raise your eyebrows and and control your expressions of disgust or surprise. Many times our kids are facing really BIG problems and we need to be there for them.

I wish I could tell you that we did everything right. But, of course, we didn’t. It is truly only by God’s great and marvelous grace that our kids are living for Him. We had some rough, heart-breaking moments. We feared for their salvation and futures. We praise Him for His great kindness and mercy to us and give Him the glory!

Raising kids is a scary, daunting task. Especially for Christian parents. We so much want our kids to live for the Lord, but we can’t make the decision for them.

However, there are some things we can do to encourage them to choose Christ. The most important thing is to encourage them to love righteousness and hate evil. We need to show them that peace and joy are found in following Jesus– not in a love affair with the world. Teach them to obey Christ in all areas of their lives– not just the politically correct ones. (i.e. of course, we are told to help the poor, but this is just a small portion of what it means to be a Christian– it is certainly not the defining trait of a Christian, as we are being told these days by the mainstream church). We need to teach them by our words and by how we live that our worth and purpose is found in our relationship with God, not in the things of this world.

We won’t be perfect, but we need to show them what it means to be going the right direction and growing as a believer.

It’s not about perfection, it’s about direction.

And, finally, pray. Pray often and pray hard for the souls of your kids. Pray that they would hunger for God’s Word. And that they would love righteousness and hate evil.

Satan will try to trick you into believing that your kids are a lost cause–that it is impossible to raise godly kids in this culture and in this era, but don’t you believe him! It is not impossible– not when God is on your side. And God has provided His precious Word as a guide.

Yes, it will be extremely hard and require much courage.

And, yes, it will take sacrifice.

You will probably lose a few friends through the process.

And, yes, there will definitely be frequent moments when your kids and their friends will think you are uncool.

But keep your eyes on the goal. Don’t let them stray. You have a job to do. You can’t afford to get distracted. God will guide and direct you. You will make mistakes, but His grace and mercy will cover them. Stay humble and stay teachable.

And, finally, give up your love affair with the world. Because if you don’t, it will cost you. A lot.

 

The Thing Anger Never Accomplishes

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Anger is just one of those things we justify, isn’t it? We can come up with so many different reasons why we should be “allowed” to be angry. Such as–

Someone said something unkind

Our spouse didn’t meet our expectations

Someone isn’t giving us something we want

Our co-worker isn’t carrying their load

Our kids are too noisy or too defiant or too annoying

The line is soooooo long

We are cut off on the highway

Our phone quit working

We spilled coffee on our laptop

The dog chewed a hole in the carpet

There are over a million reasons that we Christians will use to rationalize our angry outbursts or our seething, simmering, cold silences.

As in —pretend they aren’t sinful. Pretend they aren’t our fault. Pretend that we aren’t to blame for our anger. We convince ourselves that it is someone else’s fault. It is certainly not ours.

When we do this, we do feel better, don’t we? At least on the surface. This requires no repentance. No work on our part to change. No guilt.

The past few weeks we have been reading in Proverbs in our Bible Challenge. There is so much wisdom in this book of the Bible that I have found myself liberally highlighting many of the verses there. But the verses on anger may have been especially appropriate for me with this read-through. Let me tell you why–

Recently, I have fallen prey to this dangerous anger game. I would be irritated or frustrated and instead of taking responsibility, found it easier just to blame it on someone else. Even as I write, I find myself a little reluctant to take full responsibility for my anger. After all, she did this…or he said that

And then my Sunday School teacher said something the other week that stopped me in my tracks. (Thank you, Morris!)–

Your anger will never accomplish anything for God’s righteous purposes.

I felt like he was speaking directly to me (and–if I’m honest– maybe to my husband, too!) We have had an interesting last few months. Interesting seems a good word, since I don’t want to complain. Most of what is happening is really good–some of what is happening is not so good, but, through it all, we are very aware that we are so blessed. But what all of these changes have led to is a whole lot of stress and intensity of feelings that is a bit outside our norm as a family.

My teacher’s words struck a chord deep within as I realized that I had been trying to use anger (it’s cold, punishing silence and the occasional unkind outbursts) to try to make things the way I want them to be. Or to fix something. Or to make someone feel guilty. Or to change someone’s mind.

There are many reasons to be angry and to act on that anger– but none of them are for God’s glory.

Anger can be a very effective tool. But there is always a way that we could do it better and more effectively. Anger is never the best way. Sure, we may be able to make our kids obey us by screaming at them, but if we train them to only respond when our voice reaches a certain pitch, then they will continue in that same pattern with their own kids. How much wiser to keep our voices low and demand obedience immediately, with consistent consequences to follow.

And let me make something very clear– I am not saying that we did this right. I am here saying we didn’t do this right. Anger has always been a struggle for us in our family. We can see the fruits of it in our kids’ lives and we are sending them off into the world to fight their own battles with this sin. We could have done such a better job in this area. Oh, we never threw plates or shouted obscenities, but we did let many angry words fly over the years and for that I have great regret.

Especially when I think of it in light of the words of my teacher.

I remember someone talking about angry words years ago and comparing them to toothpaste– once they are squeezed out of the tube, you cannot put them back in. Our kids don’t forget the mean, hateful things we say in the heat of an argument or temper tantrum. Neither do our spouses and other family members. Self-control–that fruit of the Spirit listed in Galatians 5:22-23–is very much in need when it comes to this sin of anger. For even if we are angry, we need to think first and confess before we act on it.

If we are human, we will have to admit that anger is as natural a feeling as being happy or sad. We humans, without exception, hate our plans being thwarted. Sure, some of us get worked up much more easily than others, but we all have our limit. We all have our threshold of when enough is enough. How that looks is different for all of us. Some of us are screamers. Some of us grow icy cold and quiet. Anger is a sin in both cases, although screamers tend to have more pieces to pick up after it’s all over. Some withhold conversation or physical touch in order to punish, others may yell and curse– or even occasionally throw something –but both reactions are sinful reactions.

There are a few sins that have become extremely accepted by the church — to the point that we rarely even discuss them anymore. I believe anger is one of them.

I have no idea today if you have fought this battle, are fighting this battle, or aren’t even convicted about this. You know where I’m at. I need prayer. These next few months promise to be so happy and exciting, but also stressful and demanding and, yes, even a little sad. I want to rise to the occasion and be a good testimony– I don’t want to flounder in my own wants and desires, demanding my own way. I want to remember that anger never accomplishes God’s righteous purposes!

I hope that you feel the same way. Here are some verses to get us started on our way to battling this sin.

Proverbs 16:32
Ephesians 4:26
Ephesians 4:31
Ephesians 6:4
Colossians 3:8
I Timothy 2:8
James 1:19
Galatians 5:16-26
Matthew 5:22

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The Many Faces of Pride

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I’ve had a really rough week. You don’t need details, but suffice it to say that I came face to face with my loathsome, prideful self yet once again.

Does that ever happen to you? Or am I the only one? You think you are doing pretty well in this Christianity thing and then something happens that you didn’t see coming or someone doesn’t meet your expectations and you react. And that’s when you realize that you still have so far to go. While it can be really painful, I am so thankful for these times, for they remind me of why I need a Savior so incredibly much and they help me to grow more like Christ.

Pride is an insidious, deadly sin. It gobbles up our peace and joy so quickly. It destroys most everything in its wake. Or, at the very least, keeps any relationship from being the best it could be.

Humility is the opposite of pride. Christ was humble, even to death on a cross, and humility is what He requires of us. First and foremost, humility is necessary for us to understand our need for a Savior. But, after our initial conversion, it is also so key in staying in a right relationship with God. It is absolutely critical for healthy family relationships. Humility helps us to be a better co-worker, a better child, a better spouse, a better parent. We are happier when we are humble. We bless others when we are humble. We experience much greater peace when we are humble.

When we think of pride, we often think of the kind that David exhibited in I Chronicles 21 (and 2 Samuel 24). David took a census. This was apparently an act of pride that cost him (and the whole nation of Israel) dearly. We can’t know for sure, but according to my Bible study notes, David’s act of taking this census could have angered God for a number of reasons. Perhaps because David was trying to gratify his pride in the great strength of his army and military power. Or he was putting more trust in his forces than in his God. Maybe this was showing that he was taking credit for the many victories of Israel. Whatever his reason, we know that God was angry, as we read in the passage.

And our pride often looks like David’s in our own day-to-day living. We take credit for something; we want the glory; we draw attention to our accomplishments and awards and accolades.

But let’s just say that we don’t really struggle with this type of thing. Maybe we hate attention and would never boast about ourselves. We would never count our successes and victories and put them out there for all the world to see. Is there still the possibility that pride could still be an issue for us, if boasting and taking censuses isn’t our style?

Of course, the answer to this is a resounding YES.

So what are some ways that pride hides out in the dark corners of our minds and hearts? I have been really thinking about this topic of humility this week. Knowing that in order for my relationships to work right, I need to be humble. In searching some of my favorite authors on this topic, I came across a $2.99 Kindle book called Sermons on Humility by Charles Spurgeon. I have not finished it, but in the first few pages he shares several different ways pride exhibits itself in even the most “humble” of us. I will follow each one with a few practical, modern-day examples —

There is the pride of the heretic, who will utter false doctrines, because he thinks his own judgment to be better than the word of God, never content to sit like a child to believe what he is told, he is a disputant but not a disciple. He will insist upon it that his own reason is to be the well-spring of his own beliefs, and he will receive nothing beyond his own reach.

This is immediately what I think of when I think of the Christians who claim that homosexuality isn’t a sin, that unity is more important than truth, or that the world evolved. They have the pride of the heretic–relying on their own intellect or on the intellect of other men instead of on the Word of God. The other person that comes to mind is the one who says there are many ways to heaven or that there is no hell. They, too, are holding their own thinking in higher merit than the Word of God.

There is next the pride of the Papist, who attaches merit to his own works, and hopes to will heaven as the reward of his own doings.

While they may not brag or boast about this, many think they are good people, quietly assuming that their good deeds outweigh their bad ones and this will be what gets them into heaven. Even many, many Christians (or shall I say people who identify with the religion of Christianity) believe they are going to heaven based on their own merit. This is pride. This is the kind that keeps our eyes blinded to our need for a Savior.

Next there is the pride of the curious. The man who is not content with simplicities, but must pry into mysteries. He would if he could climb to the Eternal Throne, and read between those folded leaves and break the seven seals of the mysterious book of destiny. You know well our apostle has many things in his writings which are hard to be understood, yet he uttered them because of the Spirit, and you never meet with any attempt in the apostle’s writing as you do in the preaching of some ministers, as you do in the conversation of some professors, to reconcile predestination with free will. He was quite content to preach to men as free agents, and exhort them to repent, quite willing to speak of God as working in us to will and do of his good pleasure, while we also work out our own salvation with fear and trembling. Paul was never curious to find out where the lines of truth met, he was perfectly content to take his doctrine from his Master’s spirit, and leave the old wives fables and endless genealogies and disputings, and questionings, to those who had no better guests to entertain.

I included this whole section here because it goes so very well with my post from Monday. I agree with Spurgeon whole-heartedly– it is prideful to think we have to understand the things we can’t understand. Yes, the ungodly will call you stupid and unintellectual when you take this approach (mostly because of their own personal pride). They don’t know God the way we do if we are saved. They don’t understand that submitting to His sovereignty is an incredible blessing. That some questions can go unanswered because the ones that really matter have already been answered. They can’t get it. Their eyes can’t see.

Again, there is the pride of the persecutor; the man who is not content with his own notions, but would hunt to death another, the pride which suggests that I am infallible, and that if any man should differ from me, the stake and the rack would be the due deserts of so great a sin, against so great a person as myself.

We may not want to see someone physically harmed when they don’t agree with us, but how many broken families and split churches fall under this type of pride? Millions? Trillions? This is perhaps the most tempting one for “godly Christians”. We think we are right. We believe that our opinion is best. We believe we are infallible. But if it’s not within the pages of scripture, is it actually something worth a broken relationship?

Is any special piece of furniture or bank account worth the fracturing of a family upon a parent’s death?

Is any decision of our adult children worth the tense and strained relationship that comes when we keep insisting they are doing the wrong thing or making the wrong choice?

Is any opinion of mine worth holding on to if it’s causing stress and constant argument in my marriage?

Is my hurt pride over what I heard that someone said about me worth a broken friendship?

NO, a thousand times NO. The answer to all of these questions is NO.

And so, so many of us fall prey to this deadly sin, leaving a trail of broken hearts and strained relationships. I don’t want to do this. I want my marriage more than I want to be right. I want a right relationship with my kids more than I want to be right. I want to be a good testimony more than I want to be right.

Keep in mind I am not talking about biblical truth here. Of course, we have to stand strong and fight for the truth held within the pages of scripture. I might add here that even these biblical debates can and should only be done with great gentleness and kindness. But most of us are not arguing over biblical doctrine (a few more of us should be! We seem to not find that important, while inane, silly things get us so riled up!), instead, we are debating and arguing over issues which have no biblical mandate. No right or wrong. I am talking about the silly, stupid stuff we won’t bend on. The stuff that isn’t worth it.

Life is hard. Relationships take work. And no relationship works well without at least one party practicing humility. Joy and peace elude us without humility. Unanswerable questions haunt us without it.

And so we start with us. Today. The only place we can start. And we take our desire to be right, our yearning for glory, and our prideful thoughts about how good we are and hand them all to the Lord, asking Him to humble us and to become more like Him.

Often crying and screaming inside our heads as we endure the emotional pain of the process.

 

 

Spurgeon, Charles (2014-09-28). Twelve Sermons on Humility; Titus Books. Kindle Edition.

 

Is Magic That Big of a Deal?

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I could feel my little-girl heart beating fast inside my chest. My hand slowly reached out to hold onto the little piece that was supposed to move ever so slowly on the Ouija Board in front of us and give us the answers to our most important questions. My two friends’ hands were also on the piece. We waited expectantly.

Somewhere way down deep inside me, this felt absolutely wrong. Yes, I was young but I knew, without a shadow of a doubt, that this was not something I should be fooling around with. After just one question, I made up some reason why I couldn’t keep playing and we left the evil game behind and went outside to play.

That moment is forever etched in my mind. I knew that this was no game. And I knew that I was playing with danger. My spirit was so vexed within me, I almost felt like I couldn’t breathe. I needed to get away from that game. I don’t remember details but I remember that feeling!

I thought of that memory the other day when I was reading about Saul. In our 2015 Bible Reading Challenge this past week, we read about Saul’s death and David being crowned King of Judah. In the midst of all of that, we are reading many of the Psalms. They are like a breath of cool, crisp air in the midst of all of the action and drama we are reading, giving much needed encouragement and refreshing the spirit.

But when I read about Saul’s death the other day in the I Chronicles passage, something really hit me. His death is recorded this way–

(I Chronicles 10:13-14) So Saul died for his breach of faith. He broke faith with the Lord in that he did not keep the command of the Lord, and also consulted a medium, seeking guidance. 14 He did not seek guidance from the Lord. Therefore the Lord put him to death and turned the kingdom over to David the son of Jesse.

Saul died for disobedience and lack of faith. But he also died for seeking guidance from a medium.

We know from other passages that God abhors sorcery and witchcraft. It is abundantly clear in scripture. Here are a few passages that make this clear–

Deuteronomy 18:9-12
Isaiah 8:19-20
2 Chronicles 33:6
Acts 19:19
Galatians 5:19-21
Revelation 21:8

So if Saul died partly for his use of sorcery and we see clearly that anyone who practices sorcery will not inherit the Kingdom of God, then I can’t help but wonder if our lackadaisical attitude towards witchcraft and sorcery as believers is a problem?

We seem to just accept this as innocent and fun entertainment.

But is it?

What should our attitude be towards books and movies that are driven by magic and spells? What about Ouija Boards, tarot cards, and horoscopes? Are these things just light-hearted fun or are they dangerous tools? Should anything having to do with sorcery be in our homes?

I’m just asking.

Here’s the thing–

I know that so many of you draw the line at having actual magical items in your homes, but really leave your guard down when it comes to entertainment. For some reason, many of us Christians, while we believe it’s wrong to actually participate in something we know God hates, we think it’s okay to read it or watch it. I don’t really get this, but I do recognize that Harry Potter books sit on the shelves of many believers. Some own every Twilight movie. And they may even record The Medium. In each of these series, the whole plot is driven by magic and the supernatural in a very entertaining way–they focus on an unknown world that so intrigues us all.

We love a good fantasy, don’t we?

A place where we can get lost and escape for a little while and these books, movies, and shows do just that for us.

I named three of the most popular, but I know there are many other examples of this kind of entertainment in so many of our home libraries. Even some Disney movies push the limit in this area of magic and spells. There are several we chose not to own for this very reason.

We tend to be very “frog-like” in this area of entertainment. And Hollywood takes great advantage of this, throwing in a little black magic  (or sex or bad language, etc.) and increasing it ever so gradually and so subtly that what starts out as “not that bad” ends up very wicked.  And this has led us to the point that we actually have Christians reading, watching, and endorsing things like Harry Potter and Twilight (and The Bachelor and Shades of Gray and all other kinds of wicked things).

I have to confess that I am completely and utterly befuddled by this.

But, listen, I am not going to tell you what you can and cannot watch. That is certainly not my place. I recognize that we are all at a different place of conviction and spiritual maturity. But can I at least ask you this–

If we are trying to live a life that pleases God and we know with complete certainty that He hates sorcery, should we at least consider the appropriateness of having entertainment that glorifies these things in our lives and the lives of our children?

It is my belief that Satan has used the human propensity for entertainment to wield many believers almost ineffective for the cause of Christ. We have put our swords of truth down (the Word of God) and have instead found ourselves wrapped up in the goings-on of pretend worlds. We find ourselves powerless and hungry for supernatural experiences that will prove to us that we aren’t as powerless as we feel.

May I encourage you to pick up your Swords and use them? May I encourage you to clean house of all that you know God hates–and not just things full of magic and witchcraft, but all of the other stuff, too?

I  believe that it is impossible to live the full and blessed Christian life that Christ offers until we are willing to give up our ungodly entertainment.

Would you at least consider praying about this?

 

 

 

 

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